I thought that supporting Austin for his tryouts just meant showing up. I was wrong. Everyone seems to take it very seriously. At lunch, I notice that I am the only one not wearing the school's colors. Emma even painted her face. I sort of feel out of place.
“Don’t worry,” Austin comforts. “I’ll find you a scarf somewhere.”
“I have another question. If that is what you guys do for tryouts… what do game nights look like?”
“I have no idea,” Austin answers with his usual happy smile. “On game nights, I have my eye on the ball and nothing else.”
“Liar,” Emma calls out. “You live for the attention.”
Austin smiles like he agrees with her. I like that he tries to be modest about it but he also acknowledges that he enjoys the attention.
“I’m expecting greatness,” I declare. “Everyone keeps telling me how good you are.”
“Coach calls me his ‘star player’. But I know how to take it for what it is.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m high school good. Actually, I’m high school great. But that’s real-world average. I love baseball, but I also know that I’m going to peak in high school. So I’m making the most of it while I can. I’m just lucky enough to have friends who put on a show for me.”
“So you’re not going to carry on at college?”
Austin shrugs. “We’ll see. I really love the game, so if an opportunity arises, I might take it. But I know that college varsity is a lot of work that I might not be willing to put in. So… I keep my options open, but I’ve made peace with the idea that this is the best I’ll ever get.”
“Then I’ll happily wear the scarf,” I promise.
People genuinely like Austin. Few people have come to watch the tryouts – which is understandable because it really is a bit boring and the weather isn’t great – but there’s a little group for Austin, consisting mostly of the people from lunch and other students who I’ve seen around but don’t know yet.
It starts raining almost immediately after the beginning of the session. It’s a drizzle more than actual rain, but it still says a lot that all of Austin’s friends decide to stay.
“Still no trace of Noah?” Lena asks Emma.
She shakes her head. “He did say he wouldn’t be there.”
“Yes, well… it’s Noah,” Lena replies, her tone clearly indicating that she never takes for granted any plan he makes in advance. I guess I should be flattered that he actually showed up at my… unboxing thing.
“I’m pretty sure that if he showed up to school, you would have seen him before me,” Emma comments.
It’s a weird exchange.
I can’t tell if it’s a genuinely nice exchange between two people on friendly terms, or if there's a bit of a power contest under their words. This isn’t the only instance either. Lena has talked to me about Emma before. Not in a mean way, but… I don’t know.
It was weird.
From what Lena told me, Emma never had lunch at our table; she only joined when she started dating Noah. She added that it was brave of her to change her habits for something as uncertain as a relationship with Noah. But she also admitted that Noah isn’t an idiot, and that he wouldn’t date Austin’s sister if there weren’t something real and genuine there.
So… yeah, I don’t know if they like each other or not. The best friend and the girlfriend. It’s a weird dynamic, and I get that, but… are they friends trying to adjust to a new dynamic, or are they being friendly because they have people in common when they really don’t care for one another?
Then again, Emma is Austin’s sister and he’s the nicest person I’ve ever met. Noah chose her as the girl to ‘settle with’ or whatever, and he is – from what I saw so far – a nice guy too, even if it’s on another register. Just by association, it makes me think that Emma must be someone great as well. I’m probably reading too much into things because of my disillusions with friendship.
I try to return my attention to Austin, but I don’t really understand what’s happening. I lean closer to Lena. “So… what are the rules?”
“I don’t know. Just clap when everyone else is clapping.”
Everyone laughs.
“I can teach you a thing or two,” Emma offers.
“Can you teach me just enough so Austin feels like I know what I’m talking about?” It's a joke, but she delivers beautifully.
Most people left after they cheered for Austin playing. I don’t blame them. The drizzle turned into real rain. Even under the covered part of the bleachers, it’s wet and cold. But Lena has to wait for her bus, and I am not particularly eager to be home, so we wait for Austin with Emma and another girl called Jen.
I haven’t really talked to Jen, but from the few things I heard her say, I think she might have a crush on Austin.
As much as part of me wishes that the last few months didn’t happen and I was still home with my family and my friends like it was before… it’s very interesting to join a group of strangers and observe their dynamics. I don’t know Jen, and maybe her crush developed slowly enough that no one noticed. But to me, it’s quite obvious. The way she keeps bringing back the conversation to him, the way she can’t really look away, how she is waiting under the rain for him when she has a car… I mean… Sure, it’s Austin’s day – sort of – and I am waiting too, but… I don’t know.
I try to picture her with Austin, but I don’t know any of them well enough to be able to say if it would be a good match. I don’t actually even know if Austin has a girlfriend or not.
Austin joins us with a big smile on his face. “So, are you on the team?” I ask.
He shrugs. “The names come out tomorrow. But I think so. Have you seen me play? I was on fire!”
I congratulate him, using a couple of the sentences that Emma taught me.
He sees right through me though, and winks at his sister. “Are you trying to turn Will into a sportsperson?”
Emma shrugs. “You managed to get me interested in baseball. So if one of your friends wants to be brainwashed too, I’m happy to spread your weird little cult.”
“I know I’ve said this before,” he speaks, “but I’m very flattered that you’re here and that you’re trying.”
I can physically feel the glare that Jen shoots me. Like I took something from her. It annoys me. It’s not like I’m begging for Austin’s attention. I feel sorry for her if he is more interested in the new kid than her, but it’s not exactly my fault.
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