Papyrus came back. He was wearing a shirt that said COOL DUDE, basketball shoulder pads, a baseball hat and comedically-oversized shoes.
"NYEH!" Papyrus exclaimed. "WHAT DO YOU THINK OF MY SECRET STYLE!?"
"I just want to go home," Melody sighed.
"I think it's nice." Faye commented, biting her lip.
"Yeah, I think it's cute," Cody told Papyrus.
The eighth human gave Papyrus a thumbs up. Papyrus gasped, eyeing them.
"NO!" he exclaimed. "THE FLIRTATIOUS ONE HAS GIVEN ME A GENUINE COMPLIMENT...!" The dating power went up. "HOWEVER... YOU DON'T TRULY UNDERSTAND THE HIDDEN POWER OF THIS OUTFIT! THEREFORE... WHAT YOU JUST SAID IS INVALID! THIS DATE WON'T ESCALATE ANY FURTHER!" Papyrus smirked. "UNLESS YOU FIND MY SECRET! BUT THAT WON'T HAPPEN!"
"You sayin' I can't find your secret!?" Brayden said, accepting the challenge. He grinned. "I won't just find your secret! I'LL BEAT THE HECK OUT OF IT!"
"That's not possible." Percy told him.
"SHUSH, NERD BOY!" Brayden yelled.
The eighth human had already found the secret. They pointed at Papyrus' hat.
"MY HAT," Papyrus commented. His tone escalated. "MY HAT! NYEH HEH HEH!" His cap came off, revealing a wrapped present. "I SUPPOSE I HAVE NO CHOICE... IT'S A PRESENT... A PRESENT JUST FOR YOU ALL!"
The eighth human opened it. A plate of spaghetti was sitting on Papyrus' head.
"DO YOU KNOW WHAT THIS IS?" Papyrus asked.
"Spaghetti..." Cody shuddered.
"A long, thin, cylindrical, solid pasta. Spaghetti is a staple food of traditional Italian cuisine. Like other pasta, spaghetti is made of milled wheat and water." Percy answered like he was the internet.
"Pasta, I guess." Clover shrugged.
"FOOD!" Brayden yelled, punching the air.
"YOU ARE ALL SO RIGHT!" Papyrus exclaimed. He cackled. "BUT OH-SO WRONG! THIS AIN'T ANY PLAIN 'OL PASTA! THIS IS AN ARTISAN'S WORK! SILKEN SPAGHETTI, FINELY AGED IN AN OAKEN CASK... THEN COOKED BY ME, MASTER CHEF PAPYRUS!"
"Wouldn't that be kinda mouldy, though?" Clover asked, raising her brow.
"Ageing food is a great way to achieve new flavours," Percy replied. "Though it's traditionally associated with blue cheese and Christmas pudding."
"Ageing works on other foods too," Cody agreed. "Like-"
"CAN WE JUST EAT THE SPAGHETTI NOW!?" Brayden interrupted.
The eighth human was giving him a look. So was Cody.
Brayden groaned. "Oh yeah, that's right, it sucks."
"Shh!" Cody begged.
"HUMANS!" Papyrus bellowed. "IT'S TIME TO END THIS! THERE'S NO WAY THIS CAN GO ANY FURTHER!"
The eighth human held up a fork. They looked like they were braving themself up. Cody gasped like it was the end of the world.
"Good luck, pardner." Clover told them, patting their shoulder.
"It smells terrible," Melody sighed. "Try your best, hm?"
"So brave..." Faye admired, biting her lip.
Brayden punched the eighth human's shoulder.
"Go for it!" he yelled.
The eighth human took a small bite of the spaghetti. Their face reflexively scrunched up. Brayden realized it must've tasted... out of this world, if they were making an actual expression.
"WHAT A PASSIONATE EXPRESSION!" Papyrus exclaimed. "YOU MUST REALLY LOVE MY COOKING. AND BY EXTENSION, ME! MAYBE EVEN MORE THAN I DO! AUGH!" He shook as the dating power increased. "URGHHH! NOOO!"
The dating power went off the charts. There was white everywhere.
"WHAT THE HECK?!" Brayden yelled.
"What's goin' on?" Clover looked suspicious.
"RED HUMAN," Papyrus spoke. The eighth human looked up. "IT'S CLEAR NOW. EVERYTHING YOU DO. EVERYTHING YOU SAY. IT'S ALL BEEN FOR MY SAKE. HUMAN WITH THE STICK. I WANT YOU TO BE HAPPY, TOO. IT'S TIME FOR ME TO EXPRESS MY FEELINGS. IT'S TIME THAT I TOLD YOU... I, PAPYRUS..." Papyrus returned. He looked flustered. "UM... BOY, IS IT HOT IN HERE, OR IS IT JUST ME?"
"JUST TELL THEM ALREADY!" Brayden yelled.
"OH, SHOOT," Papyrus sighed. He looked away. "RED HUMAN, I... I'M SORRY. I DON'T LIKE YOU THE WAY YOU LIKE ME. ROMANTICALLY, I MEAN. I MEAN, I TRIED VERY HARD TO!"
The eighth human just shrugged it off. They patted Papyrus on the femur bone.
Papyrus frowned. "I THOUGHT THAT BECAUSE YOU FLIRTED WITH ME... THAT I WAS SUPPOSED TO GO ON A DATE WITH YOU! THEN, ON THE DATE, FEELINGS WOULD BLOSSOM FORTH! I WOULD BE ABLE TO MATCH YOUR PASSION FOR ME! BUT ALAS, I, THE GREAT PAPYRUS... HAVE FAILED. I FEEL JUST THE SAME AS BEFORE."
The eighth human shrugged. They didn't mind.
"So... the date's over?" Brayden asked.
"PERHAPS IT IS, BRAYDEN," Papyrus sighed.
"Hey! You remembered my name!" Brayden cheered.
"BUT FIRST!" Papyrus exclaimed. "I MUST MONOLOGUE ABOUT HOW I DRAGGED THE POOR RED CHILD INTO A DEEPER POOL OF PASSION FOR ME. HOW COULD I HAVE DONE SUCH A THING TO EVERYONE'S BELOVED FRIEND?" He whimpered. He gasped. "NO! WAIT! THAT'S WRONG! I CAN'T FAIL AT ANYTHING! RED HUMAN! I'LL HELP YOU THROUGH THESE TRYING TIMES! I'LL KEEP BEING YOUR COOL FRIEND... AND ACT LIKE THIS ALL NEVER HAPPENED. AFTER ALL, YOU ARE VERY GREAT. ALL OF YOU! IT WOULD BE TRAGIC TO LOOSE YOUR FRIENDSHIPS."
"Hey, we're still friends!" Cody cried out.
"SO PLEASE, HUMAN THAT WIELDS A STICK..." Papyrus pleaded. "DON'T CRY BECAUSE I WON'T KISS YOU. BECAUSE, I DON'T EVEN HAVE LIPS. AND HEY, SOMEDAY, YOU'LL FIND SOMEONE AS GREAT AS ME." The eighth human looked unsure. "WELL, NO, THAT'S NOT TRUE. BUT I'LL HELP YOU SETTLE FOR SECOND BEST! NYEH HEH HEH HEH HEH!"
Papyrus left the room... before returning a second later.
"OH, AND IF YOU EVER NEED TO REACH ME... HERE'S MY PHONE NUMBER!" He gave the kids a phone number. Percy added it to the phone's contacts. "YOU CAN CALL ME ANYTIME! PLATONICALLY." He grinned. "ANYWAY! WE SHOULD ALL WATCH A MOVIE! THEN YOU CAN ALL TRY SOME OF MY SPAGHETTI!"
Everyone gazed at each other, grimacing.
The kids and the skeletons all watched some really terrible comedy film with awful puns every ten seconds. They all sat on the squeaky couch or the floor. Brayden was sitting next to Faye on the couch, of course. If Brayden was honest, this movie was one of the worst movies he'd ever seen. But yet he was laughing every ten seconds.
"SCREW THIS MOVIE!" he yelled about thirty minutes in. He started laughing again.
"is it really that bad?" Sans asked. Some character in the movie fell over. Sans winked. "i guess you could say... it flopped."
"I'm surprised Sans isn't a character in this abomination." Melody groaned.
"thanks, melody," Sans replied. "but if i was in it, it would fall below the standards of 'abomination'. in fact, it would probably..." Another character slipped on a banana peel. "slip up."
"SANS!" Papyrus screamed. Faye giggled.
"This movie has fallen down further than we have." she commented, snorting.
"Don't YOU start!" Brayden grumbled, glaring at Faye.
"But Brayden, puns are funny," Faye quietly protested. "Even if they flop all the time."
Everyone groaned again.
A little bit later, the kids were starting to get tired. Even Brayden was getting tired. He ended up falling asleep on Faye's shoulder. She didn't seem to mind, even if she couldn't really move. She just watched the end of the movie, grinning at her best friend's head snoozing on her shoulder.