Wicked Games (The Weeknd)

"So tell me you love me... only for tonight."

 "Damn."

"Atticus."

"Colin."

"Atticus. Look at me." No. I don't want you to see me like this. My legs feel weak, even though it's cold I feel hot and fuck.. Wet.

I shyly look at him to find him watching me. His eyes teasing me. He knows. He knows what an absolute mess he can make of me. He knows I won't stop him either. I kinda get off to it. The fact that he can do whatever he wants to me and I'll do nothing. He can use me over and over again and I won't stop him. I want him to use me. To make a mess out of me. Make me cry and scream. Use me, Colin. Make me yours. Show the world that I'm on my knees for you. Begging you. Bre said I probably count all the bad things you do to me and I do. I bet you do too. I bet you get satisfaction from it all. Replay it in your mind before you fall asleep. I bet you imagine me crying your name begging for you to want me back. I bet it builds your ego. I bet every desperate text I send, you send it to your group chat and laugh with all your little fake friends how needy I am. But fuck you have no idea how needy I can be. If I have to, I will. I will willingly crawl on my knees for you. Anything for you Colin.

And you know it. You know I will always want you.

"Atticus," Colin says. Both hands move over my breast. He gently moves the palm of his hands against my nipples. I breathe in sharply and look away again. He gently continues rubbing them. Barely touching them, the oil now runs cold. It feels amazing. It tingles. Sending electricity through me. My breathing picks up. The pads of his palm move faster.

"Colin-" I whine, moving away from his hands. He quickly grabs me. His right arm comes to wrap around me bringing me even closer. He holds me there.

"If you like it, why do you move away?" I glance at him.

"It's just a reaction I have to pleasure," I say softly. This is embarrassing. But I trust him.

'Unfortunately'

"Oh. But you did like it?"

"Yes. I'm… sensitive, so my body can't handle a lot of pleasure at once and tries to move away." Maybe you can tie me down as you fuck me. Force me to take it. I want you to make me cry in pleasure. Fuck me so good I can't walk or think, so good that the only thing I'll feel is you. How many years will I have to wait for that?

I finally have the courage to face him. His face is red and he holds a new look. Not like before when he wanted me. No. This one is scary. Controlling. It makes me think… no. But just maybe you thought the same thing I did. You imagined yourself on top of me. While I'm all tied up and defenseless. Perfectly bent over, ass in the air, hands tied behind my back and my legs tied to the bed just waiting, begging for you to fill me. And you will. Oh fuck Colin you will and it will feel amazing. Using me like an object for your own satisfaction. Taking no account of what I feel. Just you. I can imagine your face. All scrunched up and stupid looking. Head thrown back in absolute ecstasy. I can almost feel your rough grip on my hips as you move me. The pain I'll be in from your nails digging into me. I'll scream. But you won't stop. It'll feel amazing. So fucking good.

I don't know how to feel about this new emotion you're showing me.

Oh, the mess I have made of you Colin.

He looks at me. Watching me. I feel small. Weak. I lay my hands on his shoulders. My body is boiling on the inside. I feel mushy and dead. A fish out of water. I look him in the eye. Silently begging for him.

'Please don't make me beg out loud'

But I will.

He pushes his lips against mine much like he did last night. Messy and unplanned. He's not slow and memorizing as he was before, but starving. His lips and tongue are everywhere. His hand that was holding me moves to flatten on my back pushing me against him. I tilt my head to give him more room to devour me. He feels so good. His mouth is wet and I feel our mixed saliva drip down my chin. My underwear is sticking to me and it feels so uncomfortable. But I don't want him to stop. His left hand that's still on my chest pinches my nipple and I jump. Moaning as I move away from him.

"Colin-" he pushes me back to him. His mouth is quickly on mine as if it never left. He pinches and pulls. Oh fuck. My eyes roll and I flinch. My thighs squeeze him and his right hand moves to my hip. Moving me like before and it's too much. He grinds faster and faster. He twists my nipple with his thumb and pointer finger.

"Fuck!" I rest my forehead on him as I moan. My hands grip his curls as he slides perfectly against my clit.

"Oooo- ah!" I grip him harder, biting my lip. My eyes roll back. Fuck he's there. He's right there. Rubbing, I twitch and try to move but he holds me. My toes curl and my mouth goes slack. Our breath mixes and I can't tell what's his and what's mine.

"Oh fuck Atticus I can't-" I look at him to find him in the same state as I. Face red and his eyes bleached with pleasure. His mouth is wide open as he looks at me. His eyes are questioning me. And I know what he wants. I quickly jump out of his arms and between his legs. He lets me. Both his hands fishing for the covers as he watches me. I pull him out of his pajama pants and take him as deep as I can go.

He throws his head back.

"Atticus." He repeats.

I stroke what I can't fit and suck on his head, his pre cum laying nicely on my tongue before I go back down.

"Atti" He looks down at me. His face mad. The look of desire in his eyes. I hold eye contact as I move up and down. Hollowing my checks and swirling my tongue.

And he's gone.

"Fuck!" His mouth drops in a silent moan as he cums. I swallow all of it. Making sure not a single drop escapes. He sits there for a while. Catching his breath as I put him back into his pants. I lean on Lillibeth's bed as I watch him. Only for a while before putting my shirt back on. I glance at the clock.  

Wow it's- 

"It's late." He says. I look at him. He's mostly back to normal. But his face is still red.

"Yeah. Do you just" I shrug. "Want to stay?"

He smiles. "Ok." But what about tomorrow? I'll deal with that tomorrow. Colin moves to lean against the headboard as I make my way from the floor. Crawling on the bed and grabbing the remote.

'The light is still on.'

I sigh, turning my body in a weird way.

"I got it." As if reading my mind Colin uses his long arms to turn the light off leaving us in darkness.

"Thank you." I turn back to the tv switching through the channels. I feel Colin get under the covers and I hit his foot as it lays beside me.

"What was that for?"

"What do you want to watch?"

"Harry Potter." Where the hell does he see-? Oh. It's at the bottom of the screen. I click it. Placing the remote on the nightstand as I make my way over to him.

"Nerd." I crawl between his legs and make myself comfortable. I lean against his chest and wait for my body to warm up, bringing the covers to my shoulders.

"Didn't you have a Hollows backpack in middle school?" He teases.

"Shhh."

He laughs. Bring the covers up higher, covering my head.

"Hey!"

"What? Just trying to get warm. Not my fault you're short."

I turn to glare at him. "Now if my memory is correct, Carter when we first met I was taller than you."

"Same height."

"No, I was taller." It's true. Colin was 12 and was like a short little carrot. A baby carrot. His hair was more red then and his face and body were round with baby fat. Little me thought he was just the cutest thing. Little did she know the damage that cute short redhead would do.

"Whatever, sure. Tell yourself that." Oh, I will.

We grow silent and my body is finally warm. Too warm. I can't focus. His breathing is even and it's all I can think about. The feel of him against me. This is new for us. Cuddling. I can feel his legs push against mine. The patchy feeling of his pants. I can't stop thinking about it. I'm still tingling and wet. I want to open my legs but his are blocking mine. I'm trapped. I miss the touch of his hands on my chest. The pinch of his fingers. My breathing picks up. Would he notice if I played with myself? Or maybe I can sneak away to the bathroom. I can still taste him. Feel the glide of his dick against me. I lean my head on his chest. I'm not even going to try to pretend I'm paying attention. He made a mess out of me. It's weird to hear myself moan. Moan his name.

'Colin.'

I can say that name all day.

I feel his hands come to my shirt and unbutton it. I stay silent. His hands slowly move up to my breast moving them.

"Sorry. Can I?" Even though he's asking, he doesn't stop his playing. Squeezing and bouncing.

"Yeah."