Many characters in this story, including Winslow, Reid, and Kiernan, are members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Members of this church are also commonly referred to as “mormons” despite it being an unofficial/outdated term.

Many of us who were raised in this church have A LOT to unpack as we grow, because our morals and beliefs are often unsupported by the behavior of other people of our faith. Doctrine says that Jesus loves everyone, but then people turn around and spread hate in His name. It's hard to find a place where you can comfortably worship God while also fighting for what's good and right in the rest of the world.

When this idea comes up, many people will say the issue isn’t so much the church as it is the church's culture. The doctrine itself isn't to blame. I think this is true. Sometimes I joke that I believe in a different God than the rest of the people in my church, because the things that I believe do not align with what I see so many other members promoting, including many leaders.

As a result, I've largely distanced myself from the church as an organization, instead choosing to worship on my own and deconstruct my beliefs.

Hopefully you'll better understand what I mean as you make your way through this story.

Everyone is welcome and encouraged to engage in thoughtful, respectful discussion of church topics in the comments, because I know there’s a lot of bad stuff (in addition to the good) that comes from this church, and much of that will be brought up in this story. However, hate speech of any kind will NOT be tolerated, nor will any talk of the LDS church being a cult. You can have that discussion somewhere else if you desire, but not here.

My hope is that by sharing my experiences (in this fictional yet faithful manner), I can help foster a community where both the church and deconstruction are better understood. Your engagement in these conversations, regardless of your affiliation with the church, helps build that bridge. For that, I thank you.

Lastly,

If you've left the church, you are valid.

If you've stayed in the church, you are valid.

If you're not familiar with this church but you want to explore it, you are valid.

If you're not familiar with this church and you don't want to explore it, you are valid.

What's best for one person isn't always what's best for another. Let's let each other make our own choices, shall we?