Growing up, my father always held weird secrets from me. However, I easily found them out, I was stealthy and quiet and I was surprisingly good at seeing things i wasn’t supposed to. My father thought of it as a game, finding me snooping like Hide and Seek. He would swoop me up into his arms and swing me as we both laughed. My mother on the other hand didn’t like that I was sneaky, and she didnt like when I'd scare her. I'd carefully creep up behind her and yank on her apron or shirt causing her to yeep and yell.
My mother would always say “Go snooping and you’ll find yourself right where you don’t want to be. Then you’ll end up in a life you didn’t want with people you-“ I forget the rest. She wasn’t too happy with me and dad around.
That was why i thought she left me and dad, right before i turned 20. I quickly got over it and i was able to find comfort in studying. I went to college locally to continue my knowledge in Biology and Anatomy. Something about it make me so happy and enthusiastic. The fascination with the human body and life itself had always caught my eye and I was always yearning to know more. I was so close to completing college when something happened to make me regret not leaving with my mother.
One evening my father went into the basement like usual. It was his favorite place to be, but i wasn’t allowed down there. About 35 minutes after i heard him down there, commotion followed.
“No! STOP!” I heard a lady’s voice scream from downstairs. I quietly walked down the stairs, avoiding the steps that made those creak noises. My breath was heavy and I finally got to the bottom of the staircase. There I saw my father wrestling around with a small skinny woman. She looked almost malnurished and scared. I looked directly at her, into her eyes. She screamed
"HELP, YOU'VE GOT TO HE-" Quickly her shreaks came to a halt and I heard a thump, I quickly hid my head in fear of my father seeing me. After a moment I heard the sound of something being dragged along the floor, the door opened, and I heard it slam shut. My stomach was in knots and I couldnt breathe. After I knew for sure my dad returned back into the basement, I slowly and shurely made my way back up into my room. As soon as I sat on my bed I started to tear up and ask myself why.
Why would my father do that to a person? Why didn't I help stop it? Why couldn't I just be a man?
I sat in my bed and cried for the rest of the duration of the night. Eventually I fell asleep and woke up to the bright sun in my window and a noise coming from my phone. A text.
'Hey. We need to talk once I get home from work today. I have some things I need to ask you.' It was from my dad. My stomach immediately began to ache. I couldn't face him, there's no way.
Later that evening I got a knock on my door. I quickly answered it as my father had been late getting home. My hopes were that it was him, but I was wrong.
"You are Cyrus Ledger correct?" It was the county cheif.
"Yes, I am him."
"Your father seemed to have got into an accident on his way home, it was a hit and run due to the fact that we couldn't see another car around and the car looked mangled with your father inside. He unfortunately passed at impact."
My mind drew a blank. Anything said after that I can't and will never rememeber. I couldn't beleive it. My father was dead. The officers bowed and went off, after I closed the door, I looked at the entrance of the basement and shuttered. My mind raced for the duration of the night. And I couldn't sleep until at least 3:00 in the morning. Then and only then could I peascefully sleep without the waves of guilt and sadness rushing over me.
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