I can see the moon through the open curtains of my window, thankful for the light.

The repetative tick of the clock, in the living room, does nothing to calm me.

Laying on my bed, I glance at my phone once again. Almost 12. Midnight!

My stomach is tied up in knots. My heart is racing.

I'm not exactly scared, but the nervous anticipation is killing me.

I have waited a whole month, for tonight, but it seems like forever.

He has to come tonight, if he doesn't I will be devastated!

I cant bear to wait for another whole month.

Once a month is just not enough.

I guess it would have been better if it hadn't started, if he had never come at all.

If he had just let me live my life oblivious.

If he had just let me move on from our love, and find another purpose.

But no, he had come back when I had thought I had forgotten him. Or at least the memory had faded, a little.

My overwhelming love for him had come back in a sudden rush.

Did he realize that he was being unfair?

Could a ghost really be this selfish?

Does he know how hard this is for me?

To have him with me just once a month? One night, twelve times a year.

He has made me a prisoner.

Forever tied to this house.

I can never leave

If I left, he would never find me.

He would be..... Where? I don't know where! Would he be in some sort of limbo? Some place halfway between Heaven and Earth? Hovering, searching for me?

I cant bear to think of that!

Thats why I stay!

I close my eyes and wait.

I feel movement in the bed next to me, a gentle pressure as his arm falls across my chest, his kiss against my cheek sends a shiver through me.

I open my eyes, to find him studying me. A misty translucent figure, that I can just make out in the moonlit room. His face just inches from mine.

I reach out a hand to cup his cheek, fingers sinking into the space where they should rest against skin.

I bring my hand back down to my side, sadness filling me. A tear gathers in the corner of my eye.

But I know I can endure it. I have done it many times already.

I will lay here looking at my love, until the sunrise. Until he drifts away with the morning light. And I am left hollow and alone once more.