Prologue
‘Cut the arm out or I will kill all of your family members!!’ A voice said threateningly.
‘Please don’t make me to do this.’ I cried out.
‘You have no choice, take up the scalpel and cut it out, now!! I wanna see a fountain of blood, ha ha ha...’
‘Nooo!!’ I screamed then startlingly awoke by someone hand tapping on my shoulder.
‘Your turn sir.’
Soft woman voice ran through a hot and humid air into my auditory system. I opened my eyes slowly. A young nurse approached me with a semi-robotic smile on her face. Her eyes were like a Barbie-Doll, beautiful but lifeless.
‘Sir, it’s your turn.’ She repeated.
The feeling of her touch was an adequate proof that I was already out of the gruesome daydream of mine. I looked at her face bewilderingly, then give her back a semi robotic smile in return.
The next thing I remembered was, I found myself obediently followed her on the way to the examining room. The picture from my unpleasant daydream still vividly stamped on my mind, it popped constantly and steadfastly up disturbing my reality. It was the same dream that I had experienced last night. And because of this realistic dream that took me here, in this musty and gloomy hospital, to see my doctor or to be more precise, my psychiatrist.
‘Oh…my…god…it’s been a long while.’ The doctor greeted me with a semi exclaiming tone.
‘Hi doc, I know, I was a bad patient and I am sorry.’ I said and sat down on the cold metallic chair in front of him. ‘But it’s because my conditions was getting better and better since we’ve met the last time. That’s the reason why I chose to be away from your face for a while’ I said and smiled apologetically. ‘You were great, doc.’ I continued to give him compliments.
‘You are lying my friend.’ The doctor said and smiled. Then he started reading my treatment history file.
‘I heard that you start practicing some meditation as a self-help remedy. How is it going?’ He continued without looking up at me.
‘It is going quite well, it’s doing just fine.’ I said and had a little wondering how the doctor knew about my little secret.
‘Good to hear that, so, what can I do for you today?’ The doctor went right straight to the point.
‘Arr…I have been having a dream.’ I suddenly I felt like it was quite difficult to start telling the doctor about my troublesome conditions.
‘A dream? Are you talking about a nightmare or something?’ The doctor inquired.
‘No, just a dream. Not a bad dream. But it seems very real to me.’ I said seriously.
‘Seems very real? How real was it?’ The doctor inquired.
‘It’s like after you have slept for a while then suddenly you woke up again in a completely different place and felt like living in someone else life, again a completely different person. In the dream, you would play a completely different role to your real life. And all the pictures and events in the dream were very vivid and seemed to be real, which could easily convince you to believe them. You could even smell all the smells in that dream.’ I elaborated.
‘Sound like fun, huh?’ The doctor tried to make a joke out of my dream.
‘No, it was not fun.’ I said sternly. ‘Because the problem arose after I was widely awake, I felt like I haven’t slept even just a bit for nights. It was a very exhausting experience. Actually, I feel like I haven’t slept for a while now.’ I continued.
‘You dreamt about the same subject every night or in many different situations?’ The doctor inquired.
‘Only the same subject.’ I said and frowned.
‘I see. For how long you have been having this problem?’ The doctor asked and twirled his pen across his fingers back and forth. I was his fixative behavior.
‘About five days now.’ I said.
‘How about any other symptoms, do you have any?’ The doctor inquired.
‘Yeah, a headache and a little nausea, it always happened when I woke up and always occurred at the same position on the back of my head here.’ I said and pointed the doctor where the pain occurred.
‘Anything else?’ Said the doctor then he wrote something down on my treatment record.
‘I don’t think…oh yeah, one more thing, a nose bleeding’ I said.
‘How often?’ The doctor said.
‘I have just a little blood come out form my nose but it occurred almost every morning and it’s always come out from my right nostril.’ I elaborated.
‘I see. Do you have any dramatically increasing of your stress or worrying for the time being, maybe at your work or about your personal life or something of that sort?’ The doctor said.
‘No, my life is perfectly fine except for this dreaming shit.’ I said confidently.
‘I see. What did you usually do before you get to sleep recently?’ The doctor inquired.
‘I’ve been doing some meditation since the day I turned down the modern way of my mental curing.’ I replied sincerely.
‘Does that mean every night?’ Said the doctor.
‘Almost every night, but only when I have a chance to do it, you know, for some night when I had a visitor, I kind of chose to skip it.’ I replied.
‘Interesting. For how long each time?’ The doctor said.
‘One and a half to two hours, why? Does my meditation have something to do with the dream?’ I said curiously.
‘Nothing, I just ask about my patient’s routines for the treatment records, that sort of thing. You know.’ The doctor said and smiled.
After that, the doctor began to write something down on my treatment history. I guessed it might have been my medication prescription. He closed the file and sent it to the nurse who was standing beside us all that time. But it seemed to me like she did not have any participating feelings toward our conversations at all. Her existence was a nonexistent one. Her robotic smile was still on her face when she left the room to submit my prescription.
‘Okay, I will give you a new medication this time in order to help your sleeping. Just take it fifteen minutes before you get to your bed and you will sleep like a baby. There will be no more dreaming, of that I can guarantee.’ The doctor said and smiled gently.
‘Sleeping pills?’ I asked.
‘No, much better than that, but you need to take it seriously and strictly only five days, no more no less. Because it has an addictive side effect, so I don’t want you to get addicted to it. And on the last day, I mean the fourth night. You have to take it double doses of this medication to end the first dosage, okay?’ The doctor expounded.
‘Okay, I got it.’ I replied.
‘And if your symptom is getting worse, you can come back to see me anytime.’ The doctor assured.
‘Thanks a lot doc, always good to see you.’ I said and presented my right hand intended to shake with his.
‘No, we are not quite done yet. About your headache and nose bleeding, I recommend you to have your brain a CT scanning.’
‘A CT scanning? Is that serious?’ I said puzzlingly.
‘No, nothing is serious. I just need to make sure that your symptoms are not caused by the physical conditions of your brain. Because headache constantly at the same position and one side nose bleeding could be a sign of a brain tumor.’ The doctor said.
‘So, in this case, I don’t have any other choice, I guess? So, let’s do it now I want to get to know the result either.’ I said decisively.
‘Good, you are a determined person as always, I will have a nurse escorting you to the changing room. So you can change your clothes there. And you will be ready to scan within two hours.’ Said the doctor.
And that was the last thing we talked about before I left the consulting room. The pictures of the gruesome dream still vividly stamped in my mind when I left the consulting room.
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