Night in the town square, happening at the same time as Lysander and Hermes’s discussion. Townspeople milling around the square. Demetria and Helene enter.

HELENE

This, Your Highness, is the town of Taedmorgan.

DEMETRIA

It’s…quaint.

HELENE

You’ve never been outside of a palace before, have you?

DEMETRIA

When does a princess ever have time to leave her palace? Besides, peasants are filthy.

HELENE

(Aside.)

Buying into yet another stereotype about princesses.

(To Demetria.)

Well, good rulers are out having conversations with their subjects to understand the problems. They’re also able to fully understand themselves and what they want out of life.

DEMETRIA

I don’t have to be a good ruler if I’m a princess. Besides, I already have what I want out of life.

HELENE

Well, you may have what you want as of right now, but riddle me this: what did you want when you were a child? Before your Evil Stepmother even stepped into your life?

DEMETRIA

Even then I knew I wanted to be a princess.

HELENE

Tell the truth.

DEMETRIA

That is the truth!

HELENE

You gotta dig a little deeper! Find out who you really are!!! What are you compensating for?!?

DEMETRIA

Nothing!!! I have nothing to be ashamed of because I’m an open book!!!

HELENE

If that’s so, why don’t you just tell me everything about your childhood?

DEMETRIA

Why are you being so nosy?

HELENE

Cause it’s kind of my job to figure out what everyone needs and make it happen!!!

DEMETRIA

Well, I guess that since it has nothing to do with what’s going on at the present moment, so I guess it’s all right.

(Aside.)

Besides, I can always just omit the stuff that paints me in a bad light.

HELENE

What did you say?

DEMETRIA

Nothing.

(Sighs.)

My mother was the kindest and most merciful queen out there. She cared deeply for me and encouraged my love of faerie tales and faerie tale endings. She taught me to have pride in myself. Then…

(Long pause.)

HELENE

What?

DEMETRIA

Then…nothing. My mom died, my stepmother took over, she cursed me, Hermes kissed me, and I became a princess. And we lived happily ever after. The end.

HELENE

Wait, wait, wait! You were about to say something deep and meaningful!!!

DEMETRIA

No, I wasn’t.

HELENE

Yes, you were! Stop lying to me!!!

DEMETRIA

Well…I would tell you, but how can I trust someone to believe me if they keep calling me a liar?

HELENE

I keep calling you that because you haven’t been honest with me once!!! The only time you’ve been real with me so far is when you told me that half complete backstory!!! Don’t you know that as a writer you should never leave a story incomplete?

DEMETRIA

Oh? And what would you call the stories within 1001 Arabian Nights?

HELENE

What do you mean?

DEMETRIA

The story goes that a murderous king who executed all his previous wives was married to a young girl. The night before she could be executed, she began a story, but didn’t finish it so the king was kept wanting more and her execution was postponed. The next night she began telling an entirely different story and didn’t finish it, and it went like that for 1001 nights. According to this, none of those stories were finished so why should I finish mine?

HELENE

Wow. You are really going all out just to distract me so you don’t have to finish the story, aren’t you? But I will admit that you are very good at persuasion.

DEMETRIA

Why, whatever do you mean? I’m just a naïve princess.

HELENE

Anyone who talks like that definitely has something to hide.

DEMETRIA

Fine. You wore me down. I’ll tell you.

HELENE

Excellent!!! Tell me everything!!!

DEMETRIA

The truth is…

(Glances around. Leans in.)

I’m actually part of the Faerie Tale Management Agency.

HELENE

Oh really? Tell me more about this.

DEMETRIA

At the Faerie Tale Management Agency, it’s our job to make sure that the canonical faerie tales don’t go awry. We are there to ensure that Cinderella meets and gets her prince while keeping the evil stepmother at bay, and we are there to make sure that no other faerie tales get mixed with the wrong ones in the process.

HELENE

So…your job is to make sure that we don’t do our job?

DEMETRIA

Yep! Unless the happily ever after follows the story, that is.

HELENE

Well, our job is to make sure that everyone gets the happy ending they deserve so that would probably never happen. I’m sorry to say, but your company isn’t real.

DEMETRIA

Drat!

HELENE

So…won’t you be kind enough to tell me the truth? Or, if you don’t trust me with the whole truth, a part of it?

DEMETRIA

Fine. I will tell you that one thing: When I was younger, before my mother died, I had a childhood friend, who I deeply cherished. A friend who was a hero of another story, who was fearless, strong, and wicked smart. With them, there was hope in my life. When my mother died, my hope of having a happily ever after with them died with her because I saw that my story was playing out just as it was written, and I couldn’t do a thing about it.

(Long pause.)

HELENE

Do you want me to find your friend for you?

DEMETRIA

No! I told you that story because I was hoping that you would leave me alone!!! I don’t want anything from you right now!!! Just leave me alone!!!

(Exits.)

HELENE

(Aside.)

Wow, Helene, nice going!!! You couldn’t stop yourself from interfering and now, Zelda’s going to murder you!!! Gods, how could I puck up this badly on my first job???

(Yells offstage.)

Wait!!!

(Starts running off and begins panting.)

Dang!!! You move fast for a girl in a long dress and high heels!!!

DEMETRIA

(Offstage.)

Thanks!!! As a princess, I had to be trained for every situation, even if it’s not a part of my canonical story!!!

HELENE

Well, it certainly shows!!!

(Exits running after Demetria, panting. The scene fades out.)