It was a pretty normal day until I took a bite out of my guinea pig, Charlie. Once the squealing started I knew I had to finish the job before my dad came up stairs to check on him. But that didn’t work out. He just walked in on me covered in rodent viscera, holding a dead lump of something I used to care about. I couldn't quite get my jaws to work so the whole situation was really awkward.

“What are you doing?”

“Nothing man I Just… I just wanted to crunch… ya know?”

“Jesus Christ Jerome… You loved Charlie… what the hell!”

His throat was too tight from surprise to scream in the anger he so obviously boiled with. He was honestly getting really annoying. I mean I hurried so he wouldn’t worry but he still had to walk his dumb ass up the stairs and fuss at me with his stupid human face.

I tackled him with all the force I could muster, knocking what little air he had held onto out of his lungs.

I ripped his jugular with my teeth as they unrolled out of my mouth, and that was that.

What a mess. This human thing was more trouble than it was worth.

Worth.

What was it worth.

What is my purpose.

Feed.

That’s right.

This body is a vehicle.

I stuck the key in the ignition while the meatcar slept last night.

That’s why I didn’t care.

Because I’m not me anymore.

I’m the driver, not the car.

“Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha.” I laughed out loud, slowly, covered in familiar blood and cheerful embarrassment. What a hoot. I was wondering why I had started eating things all randomly. Gotta crunch. Good to know that everything is A-OK.

Better call Natalie and cancel our lunch date.

“Lunch date! HA HA HA HA HA” I looked at the mirror in the living room, my jowls still unfolded, and laughed at my own great wonderful hilarious joke.

I reached into my pocket for my phone, but I had mindlessly put what was left of Charlie there before eating my father’s throat. What a mess. Man I am all over the place today. Well, someone is!

HA HA HA HA HA

I’m hilarious. Humor is fun.

I just decided to pick up the home phone and try that.

I don’t….. I don’t remember Natalie's number. I can’t.

Already little details like that are…. Going. Jerome is… almost gone.

I slurped my loose teeth back into my mouth, and my jowls rolled back up like a cartoon character’s tongue after it had been stretched all the way out. Almost, but not entirely gone.

I went to the bathroom for a shower. I finished pushing my face back into it’s human shape. I wonder when it unfolded. I need to keep a watch on that instinct I guess. Hopefully I’ll stay full for a while. I need to see if the others are here.

I didn’t stay full.

Dad wasn’t very satisfying, but by the time I was done with that, and my second shower, it was time for my date with Natalie.

It was a normal morning in New York City. All the smells I pretended to remember were there, freshly rotten as always, but more intense than my quickly fading records could begin to record.

Thankfully the humans in this building and this street were anti-social. I did not have to interact much. A constantly raised left hand seemed to do the trick for everyone. One long “wave”. Good Idea, me! What a smooth walk.

Natalie was there, in front of the “star buck”.

I raised my right arm as to double wave. She cocked an eyebrow in mild amusement. I am a master of socializing by this point. What quick progress.

“Hey you! How’ve you been?”

“Not hungry, that’s for sure! HA HA HA HA”

She laughed at my joke, caught off guard by my comedic genius.

“HA HA HA HA” I continued.

She stopped laughing.

“Ugh, I was worried they’d mess up the integration protocol. Are you really that clumsy?”

“What? What are you talking about Natalie?”

“I guess I can’t leave you to fend for yourself.”

I don’t remember much after that, except that I got to see what it looked like when one of us unrolled our jowls.