(this chapter takes place just after the last chapter (aka in the past)) 

The next day he woke up early enough to go for a run before breakfast. He spent the majority of the Sunday to try out the songs he had found the night before on the drums. He played faster and faster, and loved the way his mind went blank as his hands moved and how he could feel the sound of the bass drum in his stomach. After hours of playing the drums he felt calm enough to spend the evening drawing. He tried not to think too much about the fact that he was working on a portrait of Noah. He hadn’t heard anything from him all weekend, but he was stubborn enough not to pick up the phone and contact him.

Just as he had laid down in bed, he got a text.

To: Emo fuckboi

(22:40) Hey

Daniel stared at the text for a while. Hey? Hey!? Is that all he got after weeks of silence? Daniel let out a huff. He wasn’t that desperate, he thought as he put the phone down and laid down in bed. He rolled over and stared at the wall. It took under a minute before he sighed and rolled his eyes. Of course, he was that desperate. He reached for the phone and stared at the screen, before he typed an answer.

To: Noah

(22:45) Hi.

Daniel knew Noah could sense the passive aggression in his text. But if he did, he didn’t acknowledge it as the phone lighted up almost as soon as he had sent the text.

To: Emo fuckboi

(22:45) can we meet?

(22:46) Pond, 10 min.

Daniel sighed. He cursed as he rolled out of bed and started putting his clothes back on. If he had any self-discipline, he would go back to sleep and not care about Noah. But who was he kidding? He would do anything for the boy, and if that meant losing his night’s sleep, so be it.

The Pond wasn’t too far away, and with a bike, it only took Daniel a couple of minutes to get to it. He showed up well before his ten minutes, but Noah was already sitting at the pier, looking out over the pond, with his back to Daniel. Daniel wondered if he had come here before texting him, and was suddenly glad he had responded to the text. He didn’t like the thought of leaving Noah here all by himself.

Noah turned his head as he heard Daniel approach. As he turned, Daniel swore he could see something dark across his face. But it only lasted a tenth of a second, and then he was back to being Noah, and his face was lit up in a smile, his eyes shining, and his white teeth visible in the dark. Daniel walked slowly out on the pier and sat down on the edge, next to Noah. He had never liked the water, and especially not like this, when it was dark, and bottomless, and threatening. He sat stiff on the edge, his hands gripping the pier on each side of his legs, his knuckles turning white. He took three deep breaths and forced himself to relax.

“Do you hate me?” Daniel asked into the silence. Noah whipped his head to look at Daniel, a frown on his face. Daniel looked back at him uneasy.

“What?” Noah asked.

“Cause if I did something, you need to tell me. You know I’m not good at this kind of things, I don’t know what I- If I fucked up, or¬¬—”

“No”, Noah cut him off, “No you didn’t – I’m not mad at you, okay?” Daniel gave a small nod as he looked across the pond, biting his lower lip.

“I just thought-”, he said with a small voice. “You’ve been kind of ignoring me.”

“I know”, Noah sighed. Daniel could see him slouch in his sideview. “I’m sorry. It’s not because I’m mad at you, though.”

They sat in silence for a while, and when Noah didn’t elaborate, Daniel asked cautiously, “Is it because of Emily? Because you two broke up?” Noah sighed and ran a hand through his hair.

“I don’t know, man. I mean – I guess? I’ve just had a lot to think about.” Daniel didn’t say anything, but Noah didn’t need his encouragement before he continued. “I think… After we broke up, that I understand more – Like, I see clearer now that we might’ve not been as good together as I thought. And I just – I don’t know… I’ve just been really confused about-” Noah stopped abruptly. Daniel frowned at the pause, but he didn’t say anything, or even looked at him and tried to keep his face as neutral as possibly when Noah continued. “– Things… I don’t even know, dude.”

They sat in silence. Daniel didn’t know what to say, or if Noah even wanted him to say anything. They just sat side by side, staring into the darkness. Noah could barely see the outline of Noah and he could feel the temperature dropping slowly.

“Are you mad at me?” Noah asked quietly.

Even though his voice was thin, it made Daniel jump. He looked down at his hands as he frowned. “What, no. Why would I be mad at you?”

“I’ve been a shithead, lately. You are allowed to hate me a little.”

“I don’t – I’m not… I’m not mad at you”, Daniel said quiet. He didn’t dare look at Noah, but could feel his eyes on him. Suddenly he felt Noah lay his hand on top of his. He looked down on his lap and their hands, before he looked up at Noah. Noah gave him a small smile.

“We’re good?” he asked. Daniel gave a small nod and let out a weak ‘Yeah’. Noah removed his hand and Daniel looked away. He swallowed nervously and bit his lip, thankful that Noah couldn’t see him blushing in the dark. Daniel then stood abruptly.

“I should get home”, he said without looking at Noah. Noah got up too, and together they walked out of the woods and parted at Daniels house. He tried to sneak as silently he could inside his house, and let out a tired sigh as he looked at the watch. 01:23. He collapsed into bed and fell asleep as his head hit the pillow.