Today was a good day for me.

Not great, not bad, just good. It’s weird how some days you feel like you’re on top of the world and you’ve been progressing in life more than you could have ever imagined and some days, you think to yourself, am I really progressing? Is it only me seeing my progression or are other people aware of it also?

I had such a hard time admitting this to myself but I still was a shy person six months ago. I found myself shying away from group hang-out because I did not feel good about having to fight for the attention of other people and having that little tension whenever you’re talking. I hate it. I hated it so much that I refused to watch any real life show or interview that included more than two people. I was extremely aware of the people who wanted to speak but could not get to do so because they were overpowered by someone else. Two or so months ago, I forced myself to watch it along with forcing myself to hang out with groups of people (assorted types of groups of people) and I can say that I have been comfortable around the idea of talking to a group of people…

Except when I am around a group of people who, for some reason, are uncomfortable with commenting on the things I say. I don’t know how to describe it exactly but you can just sense it when other people are holding themselves back from saying something and it just gets to me. It doesn’t feel good. Especially since I still feel a bit insecure about if I am an amazing company to others or if I talk too much about myself.