The next evening, Matthews thought long and hard about whether he could strip to the waist so he could feel Kent’s hands on his bare skin, but in the end decided it was too soon. The important thing was to win Kent’s trust and build his confidence, not to gratify himself, not yet, so he was fully dressed when he let him in, an hour or so after dinner. He was glad of it when Kent asked him confidently to lie down for his massage without waiting for him to suggest it. If he was surprised to find Kent had no hesitation in kneeling next to him and placing his hands on his shoulders, he was absolutely staggered when Kent asked him tentatively whether it would be all right if he sat astride him.
“Oh my God yes!” Matthews paused, “Sorry, that came out a little intense, didn’t it? It would be absolutely okay with me if you sat on my legs. Does that sound better?”
Kent laughed, surprising both of them.
Matthews was exceedingly glad he was facedown when Kent settled himself on his legs and reached forward to massage his shoulders. He could feel Kent’s warmth sinking into his thighs, the firm pressure of his knees on each side, the rocking motion as Kent moved back and forth to reach his neck and shoulders. Matthews suspected he wasn’t going to find the massage remotely relaxing. He was already halfway to an erection.
“Is that okay?” asked Kent innocently. “Are you comfortable?”
Did Kent know what effect he was having on him, or not? Several wildly inappropriate answers occurred to Matthews but in the end he managed. “I’m fine, but I don’t think comfortable is quite the right word here.”
Kent stopped moving as he tried to work out what Matthews meant. “Do you want me to get off?”
The Captain couldn’t help it, he snorted with laughter; he’d thought he was the one doing that. Luckily he didn’t say that aloud. “I’m sorry, Richard, that was just really funny,” he apologised hastily. “Please don’t be offended.”
But by then Kent had worked out what was going on. He sat frozen, mortified. Gingerly, he stood up then knelt down next to the Captain again and began to pummel him vigorously, working off his embarrassment.
“I’m sorry! You know I didn’t do that intentionally, don’t you?” The sudden expression of horrified dismay on his face was almost enough to set Matthews off again.
“I know,” admitted the Captain and couldn’t resist adding, “But it was fun while it lasted.”
He got to his feet and offered Kent a seat. “Drink?” he asked. “I’ve got an Orion brandy?”
The other man accepted gratefully, needing some time to regain his composure. Matthews gave him the drink then sat down and reached toward him. “All I’m going to do is hold your hand but it won’t be in a handshake and I won’t be thinking of you as my Lieutenant, okay? Give me your hand please, Richard.”
The Captain stretched out his hand and Kent moved his own hand slowly toward him, still feeling rattled by what he’d just done, inadvertent as it had been. As he watched the two hands, Matthews’ strong and firm, his own similar but with slightly longer fingers, it suddenly struck him that this was the most sexual thing he’d done in his life. Heat rushed to his face and his mouth went dry. He could scarcely move. Time slowed right down until the universe consisted only of two hands reaching for each other. The Captain’s fingertips touched his own and he flinched violently. The spell was broken and he felt a bit of a fool. To his infinite relief, Matthews did not laugh at him but told him quietly to relax and try again.
Kent settled back in his chair and put his hand out to Matthews again. The Captain gripped it lightly, palm on palm. This time there was no erotic connotation, just two hands holding each other. Kent sipped his brandy and tried to relax as the other man began stroking his palm in small circles with his thumb.
“Thought for tonight, Richard. You’re going to become my lover.” Matthews smiled at him as he jumped.
They said good night a few minutes later and Kent looked surreptitiously at his hand, as if he expected it to look different. Lover? Him? And what position do you hold on the ship, Lieutenant? Oh, me? I’m the Captain’s lover. It was strange that the words didn’t sound as ludicrous as he’d expected. He was still fairly certain though, that it wasn’t going to happen.
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