Jaden's POV
Due to the distraction of Neil and Bax's constant bickering, I didn't realize how much they took my mind off of Blake. At least until I reached the front lawn. Either way, I did enjoy seeing some new reactions out of Neil. I'm not even sure that I should be worried about him, unless it had to do with his inner stubbornness.
Alas, I didn't get a chance to ask what went on between the two.
As I slinked back home, I stared at the red door and at the house that was filled with Blake's every scent. Maybe I should take a walk around the block. Looking at the time on my phone, it was too late for a student to be out. In reality, I was just trying to make another excuse to avoid Blake.
I needed to brace myself before looking at Blake in the face. I'd have to pretend that seeing him smile, didn't hurt me. He'd smile but there would be that gut wrenching sadness in his eyes. It would be all my fault. I was the one who made him etch such a face all because of my selfishness. The more those ideas floated up in my head, the more I didn't feel like to enter the house.
I reached the porch, but felt my feet get cold under me. It was almost comedic how I did a 180 turn heading back unto the streets like some stray dog. Blake didn't need to feel like he was guilty of something. He obviously did nothing wrong.
"Jaden Bradley Arons."
The vocalization of my full name had me frozen in place. Susan had always called me Bradley when she was mad. Turning around, I saw a version of Blake that I secretly went crazy for since forever. His hair was a bit dishevelled and he had on his trademark 'dad' apron suggesting that he had been cooking. Blake's sleeves were rolled up nice and neat, as he distractedly wiped his hand in a washcloth.
"Glad to see that you've finally decided to join me," he stated from the doorway.
Standing awkwardly in the yard, I scratched my head weighing my options. If I walk away, I would only be acting like spoiled brat- not a very grown up way to handle things... I think. Just speaking to him was already bringing back the dull ache that I had been able to ignore until that very moment.
"Actually, I was just about to get some fresh air," I lied.
I wanted to run away with my tail between my legs. Sure, I wanted to go back to how we were, how we used to be, but looking at it now, it was impossible. I just cared for him a little bit too much to pretend that I could forget about it. It was his fault too in a way. If he would only properly reject me, then I wouldn't have to play peek-a-boo with my emotions.
"Perfect, dinner is ready," he said walking back inside, his eyes not giving anything away. He had a look that said he was putting his foot down.
"Blake, I don't think you understand," I tried again, more anxiously.
"I don't huh? We should talk about it over lunch," he threw over his shoulders.
Damn it Blake! I know you heard me.
Reluctantly, I went inside and quickly rushed up into my room. What was he planning? Nothing about the way he spoke gave anything off. I should be happy about this. Blake was trying to move pass our... stump? If you could called it that. Maybe that's the best way of doing it. Maybe Blake found it easier to pretend that nothing happened between us over the past week, and I should just leave it at that.
I sighed and felt the strong urge to just get out of the house through the window but I'm on the second floor. That would be a painful drop from my window to the ground on these skinny legs. Apart from feeling like I should make a quick escape, my logic to stay and reason this out was warring inside me.
Swallowing the bile in my throat, I took couple breaths to try and calm myself. I could feel the panic raise up in me. I felt unstable as I tried to talk myself down. My nerves were all on end and I-for the life of me-didn't know what to do. With one look in the mirror, I huffed at myself "Be a man Jaden". Nothing like a good pep talk before heading into the kitchen.
The table was set as neatly as only Blake would do it. The difference is that he placed my seat right beside him when it was always just us facing each other. I peered at him curiously wondering if he was alright. I took my seat quietly and waited for him.
After Blake took his seat, I felt him glance at me but I kept my head down smelling the rich aroma of his scent and food. He was being so calm and collected that I felt ashamed at my hormonal state. The tiny hairs on his forearm brushed against me and I instantly felt my blood drain downward. I snapped my legs closed hoping to prevent embarrassing myself further.
"Are you that opposed to eating with me now?" Blake asked breaking our awkward silence.
"No," I answered a bit too quickly and felt my face flush with color. That was the last thing I wanted him to think. Clearing my throat, I repeated, "No. I-It's nothing like that." Giving him a small smile, I dug into my food.
He stared at me for a second and I was so sure he was going to say something but changed his mind. We ate in a semi-comfortable silence. The plate was a simple dish, but it was so good now that I was eating with him by my side. Our knees would brush against each other, and the thrills crept up my leg like a spider. I kept stealing glances at him when he wasn't looking. Blake had a couple bags under his eyes, and the almost invisible wrinkles at each edge of his eyes, seemed to have deepened.
It was as if I hadn't seen him for months, and in that time, he'd age a year or so.
He was still as handsome as ever. My eyes traveled down his straight nose and ears slightly covered by his hair, which seemed to have gotten longer too. It looked so inviting as if I could run my hand through it. The lips which had been on mine for a brief moment, twitched in a smile as he caught me looking at him.
"The saying is true. Food tastes better when you're eating with someone you love," he almost sighed out.
I begun choking at his remark. So he feels the same too huh? I thought to myself happily. What's with him speaking like an old man though? I quickly reached for my drink, only to taste the familiar substance I knew was wine. Peering at him, I noticed him watching me with a smug look on his face.
"You gave me wine...?" I stated trying to be casual about it. Be normal!! I chanted in my head. "I thought a teen such as myself should take care of his liver," I said using a phrase he'd once used on me when he had caught me sneaking beer from the fridge.
"A little wine won't hurt anyone; much less you," Blake retorted with scoff.
I chuckled. "That's a nice pick up line. You wanna get into my pants now?" I laughed, only to quickly attempt to retract my words. "I'm sorry. I keep saying weird stuff and not helping the situation huh," I said rubbing the nape of my neck in my nervous state. Blake took a couple sips from his cup and said nothing.
Was I the one making things weird between us? What if he comes to hate me for having such little control over myself?
"But what if I was...?" he asked. He was looking at me with hooded eyes, and I felt like I missed something important. He had an eyebrow lifted at me, his eyes stared deep into mine and that was all it took to have my throat running dry before he repeated himself, "what if I was trying to get into your pants?"
Did hell freeze over?
Before I could react to what he said, his hand reached over to cup my own. My pulse accelerated at the contact of his heat. "It's frustrating having to admit to myself that I am attracted to you even when I'm trying to be a father here. It's annoying to know that when you reach home, I don't get your kisses but your coldness. I dislike the thought of someone taking you away from me yet knowing that I have no right to claim you."
I wanted to say something, anything but my brain was useless right then. Blake lifted his hand from mine and started caressing my lips with his thumb. The green dance with the blue of his eyes as he spoke leaving me breathless.
"You have no idea how the thought of these lips kissing someone else irritates me. Most days I just wanna make a mess of you, because you're so freaking stubborn. You won't even speak to me, what's there left for me to do other than to submit?"
"I hate that you're so calm," I whispered hoarsely and boldly sucked his thumb into my mouth. I rejoiced in hearing his breath hitch. My heart slammed into my chest as my pulse raced beneath the surface. He grasped my free hand and audaciously placed it on his tenting crotch and I gulped at how hard he was.
"What would you have me do, Jaden?" he repeated. The way he said my name in such a seductively deep whisper, made my body shudder. He drew closer to my ear and simply whispered, "do I taint you into letting me go or... do I taint you into never letting me go?"
No longer aware of the surroundings, I cupped him firmly in my palm not wanting to loose to him; only to feel the heat emanating from Blake's growing member. Absorbing his every flame, I let the fire consume my flaws into ash, and gave him a jerk through the material of his pants.
"Don't get it twisted Blake. I'm the tainted one. In my eyes, you're the only one who can purify me."
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Yeah. That's right. Shit just got steamy fufufufufu
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