Em and Remy were lying in the grass near the river bank, enjoying the warm rays of the sun and listening to birds that were chirping and singing all around them. It was the day following Carter’s visit. After he had left, they had basically slept the entire day, eating a little and then going back to sleep. But today was a new day and now it was time to do something else, like sunbathe and maybe nap outside. While Remy had ultimately decided that he was happy to see Carter again, he was still a little unsure whether it had been a good idea to tell Em about the things that had happened with his pack. He didn’t regret telling but he was worried about what Em though about him now. When he thought about it, he really had been an idiot, falling for that woman’s lies. She had clearly been just playing with him, and his inexperience and innocence. And now he had told Em and probably embarrassed himself for all eternity.

Em had learned a lot of things about Remy, and she had been quite confused. Mainly because there had been so much about werewolves she hadn’t known before. Remy had lived in a pack, his dad had been the alpha and he had been kicked out because of falsehood and lies. She felt really bad for Remy. Nobody should never have to go through something like that. It must’ve been so stressful for him. But she couldn’t help but wonder what would’ve happened if he hadn’t been kicked out? Remy would live happily with his friends. Her life could be completely normal and ordinary too. She’d go to school, hang out with her friends and play with Poppy. It was a weird thought. Having a normal life where you had a nice bed and proper food sounded great. However, the idea of not knowing Remy or being with him felt really bad. Just thinking about it made her chest feel heavy.

“Remy?” she asked, eyes still closed. The sun warmed her face nicely.

“Hmm?”

“How do you recognize your mate?”

“What?”

“I was just wondering… Do you like click instantly like in some romantic movie where you stare each other in the eye and then there’s hearts and butterflies? Or is it more normal but you don’t, like, want to stay apart from the other one?”

“Why are you think about that?”

“I dunno. I was just wondering.”

Remy was quiet for a while. He hadn’t expected this kind of question at all. It had caught him perfectly by surprise. What could he even say? He hadn’t seen many wolves find their mates. He even didn’t have one. This was like asking a baker how to build a house.

“Well, I obviously haven’t found my mate, so I don’t really know. But I guess it’d be a mix of both? Like, you get along very well right away, enjoy being around each other and it doesn’t feel nice when you aren’t together.”

“Hmm. Makes sense,” Em said. Sounded pretty much like a normal relationship to her but there probably was some kind of mystical layer she didn’t understand.

An unsettling feeling had found its way to Remy’s chest and did its best to spread to his stomach. Why did Em want to know about that right now? It could be that she was just curious since this was a new thing she had just learned about. Em really was the kind of person who wanted to know as much about things as she could. But there was another option that had to be considered and it made Remy feel very uneasy. What if Em had met her mate? What if she had fallen for Carter? It had seemed like she didn’t mind the hug or the kiss on the hand. And Carter knew how to be a very charming person, Remy had to admit it. He was quieter and more reserved, but Carter was so open and positive he almost automatically made friends. There was only one way to confirm this.

“So, what do you think about Carter?”

“He seems nice,” Em said. “He’s pretty lively and it was kinda refreshing in a way. I think it’d be nice to get to know him better.”

“Hmm,” Remy replied and rolled from his back to his left side, resting his head on his arm. So he wasn’t lively then? Or refreshing?

“Are you planning on going to see him in the city?” Em asked.

“I don’t really know,” Remy replied. “I don’t like the city. It’s suffocating and…just not a good place for me. Too many memories.”

“I understand. But I think seeing him would do good for you. You’d get a change of pace. I could come with you too.”

Of course Em wanted to come too. Remy couldn’t help but wonder if it was because she wanted to see the city or because she wanted to see Carter again. Whatever was the case, Remy felt like he shouldn’t be stopping her.

“I guess we could go to the city if you want…”

“I’d very much like that. But don’t force yourself. It’s fine if we don’t go.”

“No, no. We can go and meet Carter. It’s fine.”

“Nice.” However, Em didn’t really feel as happy as she had thought. Remy didn’t seem too excited and now she felt like she was forcing him to go.

Silence fell between the two again. Remy stared at the grass and all the little bugs that explored the wild jungle, carrying materials for their nests or other bugs they had caught for food.

“Remy is everything all right?” Em asked after a while.

“Yeah, why do you ask?”

“You just seem like you’re little down.”

“I’m fine. Seeing Carter was just unexpected. Made me think about all the stuff I though I had got over already.”

“Sorry.”

“It’s not your fault,” Remy said, smiling a little. “How about you tell something about yourself? To give me something else to think about.”

Remy had realized that he actually knew almost nothing about Em while she knew almost his entire life story, the most important parts at least.

“Oh, okay. What do you want to know?”

“Anything you want to tell,” Remy said, guiding away an ant that tried to climb on his face.

“Well, I was having a gap year from school,” she started. “I was going to study biology. I went to the entrance exams few weeks before all this happened. Actually, I wonder if I got in. Not that it really matters now. And living here is almost like a big field trip.”

“Why did you want to study biology?”

“Well, it’s kind of weird thing. You see I’ve always been really interested in crossbred animals. Like I love mixed dog breeds so much. I think they look so cool and interesting, like how they get some of their look from both of their parents and sometimes the puppies look completely different from each other. I definitely would’ve gotten a mixed dog if my parents would’ve let me. So, I wanted to study biology to be able to cross animals and plants myself the good and safe way. And I don’t mean crossbreeding dogs just because they look cute, that’d be irresponsible, but trying to do actually useful things, like create new food plants or something like that.

“That sounds really interesting,” Remy said. Sounded really cool too. He had never had any plans in life apart from not dying. To be honest, he had adapted the mindset that since he was a wolf, there was no future or place for him in the normal human world. Many wolves led normal lives though, worked and even had a family, and probably Em too, at some point, would decide to pursue her dream for sure and leave him behind.

“Remy?”

“Hmmh?”

“Do you want to know something more?”

“Nah, I’m fine. I don’t want to make you think about things you don’t want to just for me.”

“…It’s no bother though. I like talking to you.”

“Mmmmh. I’m gonna go see if there’s any fish downstream.”

“…Okay.”

Remy got up, shook his clothes and hair clean and then headed towards the river. Em stayed lying down, staring at the sky where clouds slowly drifted past hoping that they’d reveal what bothered Remy.

They had walked for hours and hours. Em was tired and sweaty, hoping that they’d be at the city already. A bit unexpectedly Remy had suggested the previous night that they’d go see Carter. Em had assumed that he didn’t really want to go that much, and she had been ready to let the whole topic go but now Remy wanted to go, so they went.

Em was wearing her best clothes, which wasn’t much, basically what Remy had brought him the previous time. She had shoes too, but they were a little bit too small and tried to kill her toes. She had tried to walk with them for a while but had to take them off. There was no way she would walk all the way to the city wearing them. She had also washed herself in the river and she almost looked like a person having normal living conditions instead of a forest shack.

Remy had been pretty quiet for the whole time just leading the way and Em had though that it’d be best to just leave him be. He had seemed pretty down after the Carter visit but Em hadn’t been able to figure out what was wrong. Remy avoided questions, mumbled and disappeared outside for hours, so Em decided to leave him be.

Finally, they heard the sounds of cars and people and soon a road appeared from behind the trees. They had followed the river that now changed its direction more to the right while Remy and Em continued on their course and headed towards the city centre, avoiding the road. They stopped in the outskirts of the city for a little break and to put on their shoes, so they would look like civilized people.

“I’m guessing Carter is in the park,” Remy said, speaking for the first time in hours. “He knows how much I dislike the city, so he would choose the quieter place.”

“Okay.” Em looked at the sky. The sun was already high. They had left early but Em was a slow walker, so it had taken them a little bit longer than what it would’ve taken if Remy had been alone. It was already afternoon which meant that it would be very late until they’d get home. This thought didn’t please Remy at all.

“So, let’s go. He’d better be there, or I won’t be happy.”