I was walking through the rows of headstones and trees covered in a glistening white powder. Looking for a specific one. My older brother Jack’s. He was walking home from school when his best friend, Tyler Jackson, shot him. Tyler got life in prison with no chance of parole for first-degree murder, possession of a deadly weapon, and drug possession. He didn’t last long though, six months into his sentence he committed suicide. He hung himself with his roughly cut linen bed sheets. I glanced around at my surroundings, there was a large oak tree in front of me and a large granite stone sitting under the base of the large tree. Carved elegantly into the granite was:
‘Here Lies Jackson Thomas Jones A Devoted Brother, Boyfriend, and Son, He Will Be Greatly Missed
September 30th, 1995 - November 1st, 2015'
I remember the funeral and how dark and dreary the day was, it was raining with lightning. I was dressed in a black dress with matching shoes and tights, I remember the cold November air biting through the thin layers I was wearing. Chilling me to the bone making my teeth chatter. After the funeral, I sat in my room with my music, books, and poetry I was writing on a daily basis. I ate and drank very little, almost like a bird, I didn’t take care of myself, I just sat in my room and moped the entire time.
As I looked at his grave I felt hot tears pour down my pale cheeks as I collapsed onto my knees in the cold, damp snow. I couldn’t bare coming alone anymore, it’s been 5 years since he died and I still go into his room to look at his trophies for the multiple sports he competed in. As I cried I felt a hand gently touch my shoulder, I shrieked at the touch, not expecting it. I instantly struck back hitting whoever touched my shoulder in the stomach. I heard a small grunt, I looked at who touched me and saw my cousin James, I instantly felt guilty for hitting him but at the same time I didn’t feel guilty. He knows that I have a problem with people touching my back and arms. After a moment I mumbled out an apology as I laid the bouquet of brightly colored Dahlias on top of the headstone.
“Ow…” My cousin moaned in fake agony as I rolled my eyes. “Why did you hit me, Char?”
“I hit you because you scared me half to death dumbass,” I replied coldly, shooting an icy glare at him as I stood up. I wiped the partially melted snow off of my black jeans and black and grey trainers. My pants were damp but I could handle it. I walked to class in only a light sweater and jeans in 30 below weather. I wasn’t even cold when I got to school I just went to my classes feeling numb. I barely spoke, barely ate, I pretty much did nothing.
“I didn’t mean to though Char!” He cried out, I started to walk down the small hill leading away from my brothers grave. “I was only trying to calm you down because you were crying!”
“I’m going home now James, I’ll see you later.”
“Fine,” He grumbled. “ I’ll see you later Charlotte.”
Charlotte, I haven’t been called that since before Jack got killed, no, murdered. I smiled softly as I made my way towards my car. When I got back to the parking lot I saw that my younger cousin, Jamie, was sitting on the hood of my black Volkswagen Jetta. She was in her black combat boots, black leather jacket, black skinny jeans with ripped up knees. Her scarlet red hair hanging limply around her shoulders. She had a cigarette hanging from the corner of her mouth. I growled quietly as I marched towards my car.
“What the hell do you think you're doing Jamie?” I cried out in anger. Snatching the cigarette from her mouth, crushing it beneath my trainer. “That shit can kill you!”
“What was that for?!” She cried out, pulling a pack of cigarettes and a lighter out of her pocket and replacing the cigarette with a quick light. “It’s not that big of a deal you know, most of the school smokes.”
“Yeah, but most of them smoke drugs, not cigarettes moron,” I replied, snatching her collar and dragging her off the hood of my car towards the back seat. Opening the door, I shoved her into the back seat. “I’m gonna drive you home along with your brother who scared the hell out of me. I’ll let your mother deal with your foolishness.”
Jamie rolled her eyes as I took the pack of cigarettes from her. “As if she’ll care,” Jamie grumbled. “She’ll tell me I’m stupid and leave it at that. No punishment, no anything.”
“I’m sure that’s not true Jamie,” I said soothingly, the anger fading away as I spoke. Opening the driver's door, sitting down. “I’m sure she cares about you and your brother very much.”
“No, she doesn’t,” Jamie cried, tears running down her pale cheeks. “All she cares about is her antidepressants and Xanax.” My eyes widened in horror hearing that my Aunt Luci only cared about her sleeping pills and antidepressants.
“What do you mean Jamie?” I questioned, my heart pounding.
“All that she wants is her pills,” She murmured, wiping her eyes. “She hasn’t cooked a meal for anybody in over a week. The only thing my brother and I have been eating are frozen pizza, microwave dinners, and hot pockets. At least we’re safe with you and that we can rely on you.”
“Obviously you’re safe with me Jamie,” I replied, looking behind me and smiling at her softly. “Do you have your phone with you, Jamie?”
“Why?” She questioned, cocking her head to the side curiously. “I thought that you had your own phone with you.”
“I do,” I answered. “I just need to call James so he can get his ass down here so we can leave because I have a feeling that you took the bus here.”
“Yeah,” she mumbled. “We did take the bus because James couldn’t find mom’s car keys, that’s why I was sitting on the hood of your car. I was waiting for you.”
I felt my stomach drop as I took a deep breath, the strong smell of stale cigarettes filled my senses like the smell of freshly baked bread. I shrieked as I heard a tapping on my window. I looked out the window and noticed James. I rolled my eyes at him and gestured towards the backseat where his sister was sitting buckled up.
“Aw…” He whined sadly, as he crawled into the backseat next to his sister, “don’t tell me I missed the pot party and that we’re going home now!”
“What?” I asked dumbfoundedly, looking at him confused as fear and anger began to course through my veins. “We were only talking you so of a bit-” I was cut off by Jamie who started to smack her brother who didn’t even flinch. Each blow to his arm, torso, and face. I did nothing to stop her from beating up her brother considering he didn’t flinch. I ignored the two fighting siblings that were in the back of my car.
I turned around and turned over the engine, sparking it to life. I sighed, “If you two don’t stop I’m dropping you both off at your dad’s place.”
Both James and Jamie paled, neither of them knew who their dad was, only myself and my mother did. My mother told me to never tell them or bring them to their dad was until they were both 18-years-old and in either college or university.
“Y-you wouldn’t d-dare to…” Jamie trailed off, hurt, worry and fear all evident in her eyes.
“No,” I started, slowly stopping at the exit of the cemetery, “I wouldn’t do that, I was only trying to get you two to stop fighting so I can drive without causing a car wreck killing all of us.”
“Yes Charlotte,” they replied in unison. I glanced back at them and saw Jamie pulling her hair out of her jacket twirling a strand around her index finger idly. James was ignoring everyone staring blankly out the window. I smirked and turned on my stereo, Three Days Grace cut through the silence as I hummed the lyrics to The High Road. I glanced back at Jamie and James and saw that only Jamie was paying attention and singing along. James, on the other hand, had his earbuds in ignoring everyone still. I sighed and started to sing along with Jamie.
After a while car swerved into oncoming traffic just missing the car in front of us. I heard a loud blood-curdling scream, and the screeching of tires before everything went black.
When I awoke, I heard the quiet beeping of machines and could smell the pungent odor of cleaning supplies. I groaned slightly trying to open my eyes to see where exactly I was. I glanced around the dimly lit room. There was nothing in the room except for a wooden chair that looked very uncomfortable, and medical equipment that had wires running to my arms and chest. I glanced at my arms and saw that my left arm was in a light-colored cast. My right arm had different needles protruding from my now pale skin.
“Oh,” A light feminine voice exclaimed, sounding shocked, “you’re awake!” I glanced towards the voice and saw that my Aunt Cecilia was standing by the door holding a bouquet of brightly colored flowers.
“What do you mean?” I asked warily, looking over her outfit. She was dressed in a darkly colored pantsuit. “How long have I been here?”
“Sweetie, you’ve been here for about four months.” She said reassuringly, walking towards me. “You’ve been in a coma. Do you remember what happened?”
“I-I don’t remember what happened, all I remember is singing The High Road with Jamie…” I trailed off, lingering on what else happened. ”I don’t remember anything after that.”
“You were in a car accident with Jamie and James…” She trailed off, wiping tears from her eyes, sniffling. “Luckily, they both survived but your mom on the other hand…”
“What happened to my mom…?” I whispered, feeling a lump form in my throat, tears filling my eyes making my sight blurry as my breathing became slightly ragged. “Please tell me, Auntie Cecilia…”
She sighed and whispered. “She was killed by your Uncle Simon… he’s Jamie and James’ dad…”
I felt something damp on my cheeks, not realizing that I was in tears. “Why…?” I asked, wiping the tears from my eyes. “Why did he kill her…?”
“Nobody knows why he killed her,” Cecilia whispered, choking back tears. “All I know is that when you’re released from here, you’ll be living with myself, Jackie, Brent, and Matt.” I thought about what would happen if I went back to the small apartment my mother and I once shared.
“Would I be able to go and get all of my belongings from the apartment?” I questioned, fear leaking into my voice as I spoke.
“I’ll send Matt and Brent with you to get all of your belongings,” She murmured, “I want you to be safe whe-” she was cut off by a sudden knock on the wooden doorframe. Standing in the entryway was a slim blonde nurse dressed in dark purple scrubs.
“Hi, I’m Jill,” she said half-heartedly, “I came to check up on you.”
“Okay,” Cecilia mumbled, walking towards the door slowly, “I’ll be waiting in the hall if you need me.”
After a few minutes the nurse, Jill, finished the checkup and left. A few moments later my aunt returned to keep me company and told me what the nurse told her.
“She told me that you will be discharged in a few days,” She told me, sadness and worry lacing her words. “She also said that you won’t be able to walk for the first few days because of a splint in your leg keeping it in place. It’ll be replaced with a boot and a pair of crutches by the doctor when we have the checkup.”
“Okay, I don’t mind,” I murmured, stifling a yawn behind my right hand. I’m gonna guess that the medication started to kick in and make me tired like the nurse warned. “I’m just gonna need help with getting changed and showers then I’m guessing?”
“Did you want to rest?” Cecilia asked, looking at me concerned, dodging my question. “Because I can leave so you can rest sweetheart.”
“It doesn’t matter,” I mumbled, slowly closing my eyes, “you can stay if you want to.”
“I’m going to go and get some food,” She whispered quietly, kissing my forehead gently. “I’ll talk to you when I get back.”
“Okay,” I slurred, feeling my eyelids getting heavy, letting the darkness envelop me. “I’ll see you then Aunt Ce…”
I awoke to someone shaking my arm gently but with force. I slowly peeled my eyes open only to close them again from the bright light in protruding from the windows.
“Oh,” a quiet voice gasped, it sounded like a young child but I doubt it. I tried opening my eyes again and this time they stayed open. I saw a young girl with pastel pink hair, blue eyes, and fake eyelashes. She was dressed in a light blue jumper, black jeans, and dark red trainers. She didn’t look familiar to me and looked to be about 15 years old.
“Who are you?” I grumbled tiredly. Continuing to look at the girl sitting in front of me.
“I’m your cousin, Suzie,” she mumbled sadly. “I was told that you might have trouble remembering me because I was so young the last time you saw me…”
‘Oh…” I mumbled quietly. The name sounded familiar, but I didn’t recognize her. I assumed that she dyed her hair or something. “Did you change your hair or something Suzie?”
“No,” She replied, playing with a strand of her light colored hair. “I just dyed my hair light pink again instead of it being light purple.”
“I remember you now,” I whispered quietly as images of pale blonde hair and glitter flew through my mind. “I remember you had light blonde hair before.”
“Yeah,” she mumbled, a light dusting of pink covering her cheeks pale cheeks. “I dyed my hair so I could stand out from everyone at school. The only people that noticed me were the teachers though.”
“Really?” I asked astonished, the last thing I heard was that she was getting an award for finding a solution to slow down the mutations of cancer cells. She was a smart girl who always got bullied for being smarter than everyone and always reading. “I find that hard to believe just so you know.”
“Yeah, everyone keeps calling me names. Only the teachers like me.” She stated, looking down at her jeans sadly. “It’s hard making friends when you're younger than everyone at school.”
“What do you mean?”
“I’m a University student because of how high my marks are.” She replied, smiling slightly.
My eyes widened in both shock and disbelief “Really?!”
“Yeah, I’m a Junior studying three different subjects and I‘m the highest ranked student in all of the classes.” She stated confidently. "Too bad nobody likes me and bullies the fudge out of me for being super smart.”
“Don’t worry,” I replied, smiling softly at her as I gently placed my hand on her shoulder. “It may seem that nobody will be your friend, but remember that if you have a few really close friends that will stand up and protect you, their worth hanging around with.”
“Okay, I’ll keep that in mind.” She mumbled quietly, smiling to herself. “I also have to go now, I’ll come to visit you when I’m done studying for my upcoming exams.”
I smiled weakly at her as she quickly ran out of my room. I closed my eyes praying that my brain would shuts down for a bit to rest.
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