Andy waltzes into the grand lobby once again and takes a moment to properly admire the excess of glass. Stepping up to the counter, he smiles at the half snake receptionist. “Hi there… J-Ja…” She starts to giggle and opens her mouth but he holds out a finger to stop her. “I’m gonna get it! Just one second. J-Jaaaa… Net! Janet?”

She gives him an understanding smile and shakes her head gently. “So close, Janette.” He snaps in frustration. “Don’t worry about it, Andy. You probably heard a lot of information yesterday, I’m surprised you even got close.”

He leans over and places his forearms on the desk. “Yeah, but you knew my name! It’s only right that I should know yours.”

She opens a drawer and pulls out an ID badge and slides it beside his arms with a wink. “I had a little help.”

He chuckles and takes the badge - clipping it to his belt. “Clever. Is there anything else I need?” She shakes her head. “Alright, well l suppose I’ll be seeing you after work. Give the kids my best.” She laughs a warm laugh as he makes his way towards the elevators, using his badge to get through the gates.

Andy gets inside and hits 1-73 and stands against the back wall. Suddenly, a voice flies into the elevator. “Wait! Hold the door!” He snaps into action and leaps to the door open button and hits it just before it shuts. A tall, buxom woman jogs in with her high heels clicking all the way. Her hair is a strange dark blue that waves its way down to the middle of her back. The only thing interrupting it is a pair of bat-like wings. Her pale skin was nearly shining. The tight fitting pants suit was not leaving much to Andy’s imagination despite it being buttoned all the way to the collar. Her skirt was long but just as tight as her shirt and jacket and had a long, black, thin pointed tail poking through. She looked at Andy and pushed up her glasses over her purple eyes with a careful confidence. “Thank you for getting the door, cutie. I’m Morgan.”

She sticks her hand out towards Andy with a smile that hinted at something dangerous. “I’m Andy. I’m new.” He swallowed hard and took her hand worrying it’d be more rude to not shake her hand. The moment their skin touched, his suspicions were confirmed: Morgan was a succubus.

She continued to hold his hand and placed her other hand on his elbow. “Oh! You’re the new human hire! I’ve always wanted to spend some more time with a human.” She slowed her words as she finished her sentence and eyed him up and down. “Your suit looks good.”

“Th-thank you.” He tugs his arm a few times trying to pull away from her grip. She was surprisingly strong. He finally gets his arm free before his suit is soaked through due to the woman sharing this seemingly shrinking metal box. He turns to stare straight at the door and not make eye contact.

She follows suit and stands inches from his side. “So… What department are you in?” She turns to look down at him.

Andy stays strong and stares forwards. “I’m a case manager.” She moans in intrigue. “They figured who better to deal with humans than a human?” Just then he felt something graze the back of his neck. Whipping around, he doesn’t see anything but notices Morgan’s tail wiggling like a cat’s. He narrows his eyes and turns back around.

A beautiful ding signals Andy’s saving grace as the doors slide open. Looking up to the floor number, he sees it’s his own floor. “Here we are!” Oh no. They share a floor. “Come on!” She loops her arm around his and practically drags him out of the elevator and past several cubicles until he tears his arm away.

“Sorry, my desk is just in the corner so I’m gonna head that way.” He starts stepping backwards away from her to get distance.

“Alright, I’ll see you later then… Cutie.” She winks at him and saunters away. Andy tries to desperately pry his eyes away.

Once Andy reaches his desk, he slides his jacket off and throws it on his chair. With a loud sigh, he drops into the seat. Greg peaks over their shared wall and rests an arm on the top. “Why the sigh, guy?”

“Well A: I'm hungover.”

“That's a given.”

“And B: I just met Morgan.” Andy looked up at his coworker with an exhausted expression. 

Greg is choking back laughter and can't even keep eye contact without losing it. “And how'd that go?” 

“Based on your reaction I'm sure you can guess.” Andy grabs a stack of files on his desk and starts flipping through them.

Greg regains his composure and takes in one last deep breath. “Hoo! I recommend staying away from succubi, best sex you'll ever have but… Rarely worth it. They get surprisingly possessive.”

Andy turns back up. “Really? I'm shocked. I'd think they'd try to just get as much as possible.”

“Nope. Once they get their claws in you,” Greg thrust two hands towards each other to simulate a violent grip, “well let's just hope you have a good sex drive…” Andy looks terrified. “Anyways, you got your first set of cases there. They're all transfers from other managers so you'll probably want to start by calling them and introducing yourself. Once you're done with that I'll show you around and then there's a welcome party for you in the afternoon.”

“God, there’s like 50 here. Alright, are the numbers in here?” Andy starts to open the top folder.

“Yep,” Greg affirms as he lowers himself back to his own work. Andy starts reading through the pages and picks up the phone. 

For the sake of time and ease, we’re going to truncate the conversations into the text equivalent of a montage: “Hello, this is Andy Redfield, I’m calling to let you know that I’ll be taking on your case from Rebecca.” “No, ma'am, nothing is wrong with Glork, they’re simply passing on several cases to me since I’m a new employee.” “I’m the first human to be assigned as a case manager.” “I’m sure Snuffles is very cute, Mrs. Bernstein, and I look forward to meeting both of you.” “You should seriously call a doctor! I don’t think I’m qualified for this!” “There’s really no reason to yell, sir.” “Uh huh… Uh huh… Yup… Uh huh…” “Well I think you should sit him down and tell him that you just don’t think you’re ready to soul bind to his apartment yet.” “Thank you, bye-bye now.”

With one last click, Andy tilts back and lets out a long breath. “Finally finished. Damn, that took forever. Hey, Greg.”

The voice flies over the wall. “Yeah. You finished?”

“Yup.”

“‘Kay, come on over. I’ve just got to finish this last thing and we can start your tour.” Andy stands up and rounds the wall to watch Greg entering the last few digits into a spreadsheet. “... Aaaand done.” He grabs his desk and swivels his chair around. “Let’s hit it!”

Greg guides Andy through the various halls of their floor showing him where the break rooms are, the good bathrooms, the meeting rooms, and important coworkers. He takes him to other floors to show off the various dining halls and kitchens. He shows him where Becky’s desk was, but most importantly, he showed him the area that Morgan worked so he knew where to never go.

“I think that’s most of the important things. You wanna get lunch?” Greg turns around to face his shadow.

Andy shrugs. “Yeah sure. Wanna go to the place that serves italian food on 54?” Greg shrugs in return. “Good enough for me.” The two head back to the elevator and make their way down. In the dining hall, Greg picked up a plate of pizza and Andy picked up some spaghetti. The two sat down at a table by a window to look out over the Hell skyline.

“Greg, I’ve got a question.” Greg looks at him with the slice hanging out of his mouth. “Is it unprecedented for a human to date a demon?” 

If Greg could make his eyes wider he would. “I mean, not necessarily. It’s not common but it’s not frowned upon. There may be some purists who won’t approve but most of those folks are in older centuries.” Andy strokes his chin. “Why? You’re not thinking of…” Greg looks at his compatriot skeptically.

“Morgan? No! No! I know better than to do that. Hell, when I saw her on the elevator I tried not to… feel anything.”

“Smart man, those pants are too tight for you to have gotten away with that.” Greg took a sip of his water.

“I was kinda thinking about Becky.” Andy was surprised to hear himself say it out loud. “I mean, those texts yesterday felt pretty suggestive. I think I have a chance.”

“No, no, no. That’s a no go, friend.” Greg is holding his pizza with two hands, one for his cup, and one to wave dismissively at the confused Andy.

“What? Why?” Andy sits back and puts his arms out before plopping them down on his head.

“Mm.” Greg swallows yet somehow still speaks with his mouth half full. “You can’t date your case manager. It’s a rule.” He looks back down at his food and gets back to work.

“Shit… Really? There’s nothing I can do?” Greg shrugs without even so much as a peek up. “But… Ugh I thought she was really cute.” A minute passes in silence for Andy to mourn his loss. Until a spark of genius hits him. “Greg! I’ve got it!” Greg takes a break from melting his pizza in his mouth and looks up. “You take on my case! Boom! I’ve got a friend working my file, you’re right next to me if I need anything, Becky isn’t my manager, I can ask her out! It’s perfect!”

Greg sighs and finishes digesting the bite of pizza. “No way, man. I have too many cases as is and I’m in the middle of a massive project. There’s a lot of work that goes into a new arrival’s case that I just can’t take on right now. The apartment, getting ID’s made, bank accounts, food, phone and amenities, and so much more. Count your blessings that you’re getting old cases.”

Andy groans loud enough to make several neighboring tables look at him. Andy drew in a breath to start another loud groan until a familiar voice cut him off. “Andy! Greg! How’re you two holding up? You got puh-retty hammered last night.” When Andy looks up, however, he sees nothing he recognizes. There stood a tall thin frame of black with horns and what seemed like the top of a set hair that all morphed into the same silhouette. The skin seemed more like a pulsing and undulating smoke and his head only had bright white glowing eyes and no other facial features. The only seeming piece of clothing was a familiar red tie hanging from its neck. It wasn’t a clip on though, you could see the fabric start to wrap around but it simply melted into the inky abyss of what could’ve been construed as a collar. Finally, a thin, arrowhead tail was wagging away behind it.

“I’m sorry, do I know you? I met a lot of people yesterday.” Andy tried to give the smoke man an apologetic look but it wasn’t very convincing.

“Andy! It’s me! Lucifer!” The figure used his free hand to gesture to himself in the way someone you haven’t seen in ten years does as if that somehow will refresh your memory despite you not laying eyes on them for a decade.

“Lucifer?” Andy blinks and squints like someone in a staring contest with a light bulb. “H-how?!” He looks at Greg, defeated. “That was a dumb question wasn’t it.” Greg simply nodded.

The figure shakes and the smoke picks up speed as Lucifer belts out a boisterous laugh. “I can shape shift, Andy. This is my favorite form though. I tend to use it around the office and at home. The human form was more for your sake and for when I go out on the town. Imagine me looking like this when you first met me! You would’ve flipped!” His laughter nearly doubled in volume.

Andy chuckled out “Yeah, I suppose so. Do you wanna sit and have lunch for a while?” He pulls out a chair next to him and offers it to Lucifer.

The smoke waves it’s hand and the bright lights disappear for a moment. “No, sorry. I’ve got a lunch meeting down with the Ninth Layer folks. Brand new serial killer just arrived and we gotta think of what to do with him.” Andy and Greg both shake their heads with a disappointed exhale. “I always hate this part of the job.” The tops of his eyes go flat and slant upwards towards the forehead making him look incredibly sad. 

But then his eyes flare open with excitement. “I’ll see you guys at the party though! It’s gonna be a great time!” Without another word, he nearly skips away from the two as they’re left to watch the ecstatic prince of evil disappear out the door.