Honestly

Alright, he was ready to admit that he in fact avoided Reed. Calister sat in his last lecture for the day, legs crossed at the ankles, and was paying only minor attention. He felt very distracted by a certain someone. A someone who had nearly barfed on his shoes.

The though made him snicker, earning him a scornful look from a fellow student. Just as he wanted to apologize the professor ended his lesson and Calister turned to the front of the class, rapping his fist on the table.

When he looked back the girl had already fled, standing with her friends, whispering and pointing at him. He got up quickly, heading for them, an act that obviously scared them. The girls squealed and quickly left the classroom, leaving him feeling weirdly both angry and sad at the same time.

He was the last to leave the classroom, his eyes stinging uncomfortably as he walked down the flight of stairs inform of his university. Everything was going wrong. Really, how was he supposed to finish his studies when he couldn’t even deal with his personal problems? He felt more like a coward with every passing minute.

There was only one thing he could reasonably do in the situation: Grab himself by the balls and talk to Reed like an adult person. Which was, admittedly easier said then actually done but who cared. Calister put up the hood of his pullover and pulled on his leather jacket.

The weather outside reflected his mood, it looked like someone had dumped a bucket of gray paint onto the skyline, the air so heavy with moisture that he could hardly see the next street corner. He zipped up his jacket, his fingers already growing stiff from the cold. This was just amazing.

The streets were empty, people crowded in the warm and dry shops lining it. The coffee shop looked to be full of customers as well, some of them even looked familiar to him so they probably went to his school. The perfect atmosphere to utterly embarrass himself in front of all of them.

Calister sighed as he pulled the door open, preparing himself mentally. The air was heavy in the shop, smelling of a strange mixture of sweat and coffee. The mumbled conversations of the other people quieted down a bit as a few turned to look at him but he didn’t seem to rouse any suspicion.

Weirdly enough, the back of his neck was still itching with the feeling of being watched. He shook it off with the assumptions that his senses were just tricking him and walked up to the end of the queue.

His mind was still circling around the best way to talk to Reed here, while he was working when a someone tugged at his jacket. He flinched back but grinned as he realised who was standing next to him. Ardy had her brown apron tied around her waist, her red curls barely contained in the bun she had tied it up in.

“Finally showed your face round here again', huh?” She gave him a playful bump with her shoulder. Calister rubbed the back of his neck sheepishly.

“Uni gets busy. I had three exams this week." He explained, crossing his arms in front of his chest. The little girl was beginning to grow on him.

“Aww ya poor baby!” She mocked as she stepped forward alongside him, as the queue moved as well. Calister ruffled her hair, her subsequent squeal drawing not only the other customers attention but Reeds as well.

Calister swallowed hard as their eyes met, wondering how Reed managed to stare straight into his soul with his dead blue eyes. Sensations from that fateful night at the end of October flooded his head, his cheeks flushing while Ardy continued to talk to him, seemingly unaware of the tension building between her two friends.

But Reed didn’t blush and he didn’t look too embarrassed, he even broke their gaze first, turning to his current customer again, smiling. Calister however was still trapped in his mind, waving goodbye to Ardy as she retreated to the back of the coffee shop again. His skin was burning, exactly there where Reed had kissed it, smiling like an idiot and surely drunker than Calister had ever been in his entire life.

The man rubbed his neck to get rid of the feeling that seeped through his whole body, warmth, affection and a horrible sense of dread. He wondered if whoever's eyes burned into his back knew what he was thinking about. So lost in thought he hadn’t realised how quickly the queue hat moved forward and his hips bumped into the counter while he was still scanning his surroundings for anything suspicious.

Just as he spotted a man in a tweed jacket and a baseball cap looking over to the coffee shop from the other side of the street, a soft voice snapped his attention back to reality.

“What can I get you, Calister?” He stared at Reed as though he had just asked him if they wanted to rob a bank together and stuttered in his best attempt of a normal sentence:

“A coffee...” Reed smiled and got to work while Calister searched his wallet for some spare coins. Reed was still brewing his coffee so he turned back to look for the man but he wasn’t there anymore. He had probably just been a normal guy having a stroll in the neighbourhood. He was really becoming paranoid as hell.

The smell of hot coffee directed his attention to Reed again.

“My treat, don’t worry about it.” Reed said, then leaning in closer to whisper to him.

“For nearly ruining your shoes. Sorry for that one dear. I normally don’t drink.” His cheek brushed Calisters as he smiled and leaned back away from him again. Calister thanked him, nearly crushing the cup in his hands, exciting the shop after shooting Ardy a quick goodbye.

The cold air cleared his senses somewhat as he realised his error. Reed didn’t remember anythin. He didn’t remember the kisses. He wasn’t sure if it’d be better to be ecstatic or if he should be sad.

In the end he choose the middle ground, fake, blissful indifference.