We're both spending the week off with our families, and our things are all packed up. My mother comes in to find Nick and I in a parting hug, and that doesn't help her assumptions. As I leave, I feel like I won't see my friend in forever.

"You really both live in that cramped up little apartment? And damn, you even cleaned before I came! Nick do you believe it, he made his bed!"

She won't believe we still manage to breathe in such a little space, but at least she's happy my rent's been cut in half. She won’t stop talking, embarrassing me as Nick smiles at me in a teasing way. I sigh, following my mother into her car.

The week goes by slowly as I'm studying from morning to dawn. I barely see my parents, and my little sisters complains that I’m too serious. But no classes doesn’t mean no work, and I’ve got a lot of catching up to do. Obviously, Nick and I text each other everyday, but I miss him to an unreasonable extent. I know I shouldn’t, but I blame it on the habit of having him next to me everyday. Not on some feelings I might have caught for him. 

Nope.

•••

Going back to school after a week off should make me grumpy. I can't even recall a single moment when school even made me happy in the past, but today even my dad noticed my smile. Am I that obvious?

The first thing I see as I get back home is Nick, panicking, his hair in a mess. He screams for my help, but I can’t hear a single thing about what happened as my laughter cover his screams. When I finally manage to take a full breath, he explains. He’s apparently going to some party where some girl is going to be and he tried to impress her or something. A girl. I mean, I knew he wasn’t into me, but it still hurts.

As I wash the gel out of his hair, I try to hide my destroyed feelings. I restore his short hair to their initial shape, but he’ll be sure to be made fun of later. Right now, I’m just not in the mood anymore. My mind made me think that, maybe, just a little maybe, there could be… something. Thankfully, he’s too hyped up about the party to notice I’m not feeling well. My stomach is heavy, but I refuse to go hide myself and cry it out. I’m not that pathetic desperate guy and I won’t become one. I slap my cheeks, getting up to the rooftop for a little bit of chill air. The very spot where he held my hand, because who doesn’t love to torture themselves a little?

After a few minutes, Nick comes and join me. He’s come to say goodbye, and this time he doesn’t invite me to the party. He’s so used to me saying no that he doesn’t even bother anymore. I know I’m usually turning him down, but this time I don’t feel like it. If I stay here alone, I’ll listen to some sad songs or movies, eat raw pasta and cry myself to sleep. Ughh. My voice comes without warning, just as he’s passing the door: "Hey Nick! Hmmm… Can I… Can I maybe come with you?"

He’s astonished, but he nods as I trail behind him. I quickly change my clothes, and we’re ready to go. I don’t even understand why I said such a thing...