Aiden understood how Lucas had felt; he also wanted to strangle Hugh and Kal. He wanted to talk with Lucas. He wanted to clear things up. Even if it wasn’t what he wanted to hear, he didn’t like having to wonder about what happened.
It had been three days since they’d arrived at the cabins, and he hadn’t been alone with Lucas even once. And now the trio were taking a tent to go down one of the longer trails, that would be another two or three days gone.
If there was an upside to being avoided so absolutely, it was a lot of time left was to himself. As their guide, at every turn he was told that they’d handle it themselves. Mandy didn’t mind if people wanted to things alone, the whole point was you were there if they needed you.
They’d been gone all day today. Aiden had been practicing the violin since he’d gotten up in the morning, and he was able to play the songs he’d picked out for the interview without looking at the notes.
All that was left to do was perfect it.
He heard the front door open, and the laughing voices of Kal and Hugh filled the cabin. Aiden stilled his bow. Lucas was joking with them too.
Apparently, their technique of forcing Lucas to be alone with them at all times was working well. Aiden sat there listening to their voices and felt more and more annoyed the more they laughed.
He put down his violin and picked up the biography.
There was a knock at the door. He opened it, hoping for Lucas, and his heart sunk when it was Connor.
“I was enjoying that song.” Connor stated.
Aiden’s eyes widened. “Sorry, I thought everyone was gone out.”
“Sorry?” Connor repeated, “I’d make you apologise if you sucked. I’m heading out with Evie, want to come?”
Aiden had to stifle his embarrassment, but he was sure it still showed. “I wouldn’t want to intrude on you too.”
Connor snorted. “You’re not intruding, and Evie told me to bring you too. I was going to invite you along anyway.”
Aiden opened his mouth to object and heard a long bark of laughter from the main room. “I’ll just grab my jacket.”
Lucas’s gaze snapped to them as they walked to the door. “You’re heading out this late?”
“Yup.” Connor got the door, “Later losers.”
Hugh scowled at Connor, but Lucas just frowned at him. His eyes briefly met Aiden’s, but he didn’t say anything.
The silence pissed Aiden off.
Connor led them down a path that led to the gorge-walking river. “You still haven’t cleared up that whole thing with Lucas?”
“I’m not allowed within five feet of him.” Aiden replied.
Connor let out a long breath like he wanted to say something, but he didn’t.
Evie was sitting on a blanket next to the river. There was strawberries, cream and wine set up. Not wine, Aiden saw as he sat down, champagne. He felt like he was intruding on their date even more.
Connor read the label of the bottle and with a shrug popped it open. The cork flew off into the river. Aiden followed it with his eyes until it fell into the river. “Monster.”
Connor grinned and poured the champagne.
It tasted like bubbles and something fruity. Not at all like alcohol.
Connor sighed as he sipped it. “Ah, rich people wine. Delicious.”
Evie smiled. “It’s not an expensive bottle.”
For some reason none of them were talking much. They drank the entire bottle of champagne, and Connor turned on the lantern as the sky turned dark and stars came out.
“How long are you staying?” Connor asked Evie.
“Two weeks” Evie wrapped her arms around her knees, “And then we’ll be going south of the country. Dad wants to check out the wildlife down there next. You?”
“Two weeks.” Connor reported.
It went quiet again. Aiden lay back and stared at the sky. The moon was hidden behind a puff of clouds. “Is anyone going to ask me?” He broke the silence before they started making out.
Connor pushed him off the blanket.
“Hey!”
Evie laughed. “How long will you be here Aiden?”
“All summer long” He sat back on the blanket with Evie between him and Connor.
After that, conversation flowed easily. Aiden waited for Connor or Evie to make a move on the other, but neither did. He wondered if that’s why they’d asked to come, so they couldn’t. He didn’t see any problem with it though.
They walked Evie back to her cabin and moved slowly back towards their own. “Do you like her?” Aiden asked.
“Hm” Connor rubbed his chin, “I don’t know. She’s cool.”
“She’s fun.” Aiden agreed. “Likes to try things. Doesn’t complain.”
“Do you like her?” Connor asked.
Aiden checked that he wasn’t angry, but Connor just looked curious.
“Maybe I could.” Aiden answered.
“And what about Lucas?” Connor paused outside their door, “Is that a maybe too?”
Aiden’s head was a bit fuzzy, but he was more relaxed then he’d been in days. He shrugged.
And Connor looked like he wanted to say something again, but didn’t.
*
Aiden was woken up by a light tapping at his door. It was dark out, and it felt like he’d only just dozed off. He could still feel the champagne in his system. It warmed his cheeks.
Lucas was in the doorway. He had a loose sweatshirt and shorts on. His hair was messy, and his eyes were red. “Can I come in for a second?” He whispered.
Aiden stepped aside. He looked at Kal and Hugh’s closed doors before he shut his and turned to Lucas.
Lucas was crouched over the stacks of books on his bedside table, and from there he moved his gaze to the violin case. “I didn’t know you played.”
“I started music in second year.” Aiden said. By then we weren’t friends, so how would you know?
He rubbed the back of his neck. He felt weird. But he’d thought about it enough. He already knew what Lucas was here to say. “I started it?” Aiden asked.
Lucas turned away from the violin. He put his hands into the pockets of his shorts. “I’m so sorry Aiden. You started uh, well, feeling me and you wanted me to –“ He stopped and took in a deep breath. “I thought you wanted me, and I wanted to as well, and I’m so fucking sorry for doing that to you while you weren’t –“
“Lucas, it’s okay.” Aiden said. Lucas looked like he was about to cry. It was weird, seeing him like that. The last time he’d seen him cry they’d been tiny. Lucas had tripped over his ball and winded himself. He’d cried a lot. “I know you wouldn’t have if you’d realised I wasn’t … well…” Aiden didn’t know what word to use. He hadn’t been awake, but he’d been awake enough to lead Lucas on.
“Yeah” Lucas said. He knew what Aiden meant. At least, Aiden hoped he did. “You forgive me?”
“Yeah.” Aiden said, “Sorry for running away.”
“I understand why you did.” Lucas rubbed the back of his neck and looked around the room awkwardly. His eyes ended up back on the violin. “Can I hear you play a song?”
“It’s the middle of the night” Aiden said, “No you cannot hear me play a song.”
Lucas smiled as if he’d said something funny. “Tomorrow?” He asked hopefully.
Aiden looked at the violin with him. Did he want to play something in front of Lucas? Absolutely not. He didn’t like playing in front of anyone. Except his music teacher, and that was because he knew all she cared about was if he got the notes right.
“Will your wardens let you?” Aiden deflected.
Lucas’s mouth twisted into a frown. Annoyance flashed in his eyes as he looked at Aiden. “Yes.” He snapped.
Aiden tensed.
Lucas blinked. “Sorry.” He softened his voice, “They’ve been driving me a bit insane.”
“Right.”
“So I can hear you play tomorrow?”
Aiden looked away from him. “Okay.”
Lucas stepped back towards the door, brushing his fingers along Aiden’s back. “Sorry” He said again, “And thank you.” He closed the door softly and was gone.
Aiden climbed back into bed and stared at the stack of books next to him. He wondered if Lucas would be able to ditch the others. He wondered what song he’d play for him if he did.
*
Lucas, Kal and Hugh left for their two day hike before Aiden was even out of bed. The front door banging shut had woken him, and he’d stared at the music books feeling stupid for having lost sleep over something so small.
“Peace and quiet” Connor chewed his pancakes happily. Evie had come over to cook for them, and they were given more cream and strawberries.
Aiden picked at his plate but forced them down when he saw Evie watching him.
“What should we do today?” Evie wondered.
“Does your dad have something planned?” Connor asked.
“I can only take so many days of bird watching.” Evie picked up her plate of steaming pancakes and sat between them on the couch. The tv wasn’t switched on, but they all ate facing the black screen anyway.
“Hiking.” Connor said, “Foraging.”
“God no” Evie groaned, “Aiden, what’s fun out here?”
“Gorge walking.” Aiden answered immediately, “Swimming, fishing –“
“Gorge walking!” Evie said.
“There’s wet suits in a shed at the bottom of the river.” Aiden explained.
“Looks like our day is set” Connor stood up with a hop and took Aiden’s plate from him.
Evie poked her fork through a strawberry and popped it into her mouth. “This will be fun.”
Aiden enjoyed it.
The river current wasn’t strong since it had been relatively dry, and they could clamber up wet rocks, swim through rockpools and jump in at the cliffs that were marked safe with green ribbons. It started to drizzle halfway up, but they were already soaked so it didn’t matter.
At one point he tried to hang back from Evie and Connor, but they were both having none of it. Evie asked if he was hurt, and Connor rolled his eyes at him.
In the tiny wooden shacks that were changing rooms Connor and him struggled out of the wet suits under taps of warm water.
“You don’t need to do that.” Connor lathered himself up with soap, referring to him trying to hang back earlier. Aiden just grunted back.
When he put his head under the water and scrubbed his hair Aiden checked him out. Only briefly, and only to see. He wanted to see if it made him feel anything different.
Connor’s eyes suddenly turned to catch him staring.
Aiden snapped his head away. His cheeks burned in embarrassment. “Sorry.”
Connor chuckled. “Look all you want, I don’t mind.”
Aiden didn’t. Again, he felt silly for indulging weird thoughts. It wasn’t because he thought he was gay. He was just curious. Really, really curious.
Even if Connor didn’t seem to care, it bothered Aiden. “How old are you?” Aiden asked.
“Seventeen. You?”
“Same.” Aiden moved out of the water and picked up a towel from a box. He dried himself off and changed before he got cold.
He waited outside for Connor and thought about him. The moodiness from the first time he met him felt more and more out of place the more he hung around Connor. He was a good sport. Not exactly the type of friendly that people always immediately liked, Connor was a bit too honest for that. He was lean, like an athlete that needed endurance but not strength.
“Hey” Evie came out with damp hair that was drying into curls, “What should we do now?”
“Lunch” Connor poked his head out. A towel hung on his bare shoulders. “I’m starving.”
“The sooner you change the sooner we can eat.” Evie pointed out in good humour.
Connor snorted and disappeared back into the changing room. “Some people prefer me half-naked” He called.
“Like who?” Evie leaned against the open door without looking inside.
“Aiden.”
Evie laughed.
Aiden’s chest felt stuffy.
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