“Aiden.”
Aiden jumped awake, his mind snapped away from the nightmare. Lucas was holding his shoulder. Aiden blinked past blurring in his vision and could make out the deep frown Lucas was directing towards him.
“Are you okay?” Lucas asked gently.
Aiden pulled his arm out from under Connor’s grip, and felt his cheeks. They were damp from tears. Why was he crying? The nightmare was already beyond the reach of his conscious mind. “I’m fine.” Aiden let out a shaky breath, “Thanks.”
Aiden was on the couch with Connor. It was way too hot.
He got up without disturbing Connor as best he could, but of course woke him anyway. Connor gave his hand a brief squeeze and rolled over, taking the mountain of blankets with him.
“You should put some ice onto that.” Lucas walked towards the freezer. Aiden followed him slowly, checking the dim lighting outside. Rain beat harshly on the roof and against the windows. Aiden had a feeling the storm wouldn’t be gone by the evening.
Lucas made tea for Aiden and gave it to him as he handed over the pack of peas. His eyes skimmed down to Aiden’s wrist, but he didn’t examine it any closer. Lucas went down the hall back to his room.
Aiden picked up the tea. He took a sip. It was sweet.
“I know you’d prefer coffee, but you won’t get back to sleep if you have caffeine.” Lucas put a blanket over Aiden’s shoulders. Not one of the duvets, a smaller fuzzy one that could rest on him without being too heavy.
Aiden felt the soft fabric against his cheek and stared at the tea. Here it was, he thought, the one-eighty.
“I’m sorry.” Lucas pulled up a stool close to him.
“Sorry?” Aiden repeated idly. As if he had no idea what Lucas would have to be sorry for.
“I shouldn’t have snapped at you.” Lucas said, “I shouldn’t have gotten mad at you without hearing you out.”
“You were mad after hearing me out too” Aiden pointed out.
“Not at you.” Lucas’s fingers brushed over the edge of Aiden’s wrist. “And I just felt stupid after snapping at you. I knew as soon as I accused you of doing it for me, that I was wrong. I’m sorry, Aiden.” His voice lowered further. “I think I started to… freak out … a bit.”
Aiden took another sip of tea. He moved his arm out from under the cold vegetables and pulled it underneath the blanket. Lucas was apologising. Because he’d been wrong. Aiden didn’t know what he was feeling. There was a small part of him that relaxed. Another part that forgave him – how could he not, when he was being so earnest? And another part that would rather another injury than give in to Lucas.
Aiden couldn’t control the potent emotions. He didn’t know which to voice.
“Why did you freak out?” Aiden asked. Settling on not having to voice his own feelings. The easy way out.
“I’ve known that I’m gay for years” Lucas said suddenly, startling Aiden. He was surprised enough by the admission to look at Lucas, whose eyes then held him in place. “But, I’ve dated girls. I haven’t been with a guy. I’ve never crushed on anyone who I know before, and I never imagined – I don’t know why I never imagined actually being with a guy, even though I’ve known for so long.” Lucas let out a frustrated breath.
Crush. Lucas had just said he had a crush. Was he talking about Aiden? Aiden thought it was safe enough to assume so.
“I know you’re mad.” Lucas continued. “And I’m glad, in a weird way. If I’d lashed out like that to one of my friends, even if I was at fault, they’d eventually apologise to me. With you… it’s different. It’s always been different.”
“Hugh threatened and hurt me, and you’re glad about that?” Aiden questioned.
Lucas’s expression transformed suddenly. Anger and then frustration shot across, and the calmness he’d been speaking with was gone. “That isn’t what I said. Not at all. And you know that isn’t what I was getting at.”
Aiden looked away. “I get that you’re sorry.”
“But?”
“But…” Aiden wasn’t even sure what he wanted to say.
“Is it – are you unsure about the other part?” Lucas asked gently, his hand resting next to Aiden’s close enough to feel it’s heat, but not touching.
No, Aiden thought, I’m not.
“I’m unsure about you.” Aiden admitted quietly. He hesitated in saying it, but Lucas expression seemed like he was expecting that response.
“I know.” Lucas said. “And I know actions speak louder than words, so I’m not looking very good right now.”
Aiden looked at the hand close to his, and then at his tea. He just felt so uncertain about everything, and he didn’t know why but he was starting to feel pressured the longer he spoke to Lucas. “It isn’t wrong to stick up for your friend.” He took a sip of his tea. It was cooling down.
“I don’t know if I’d call the guy who threatened someone I like to avoid me a friend.” Lucas muttered.
Aiden blinked, then looked at Lucas. He was staring across the living room to where Connor was, his cheeks a faint shade of red.
“Someone you like?”
Lucas let out a sudden huff. “You’re really not going easy on me today.” He sounded miffed, but the gaze that landed on Aiden wasn’t annoyed. “Yes. Like. You already knew that.”
“Did I?” Aiden took a sip of the tea, amused by the huff Lucas seemed to be in.
“You’re saying you didn’t sleep with him just to make me jealous?” Lucas grumbled. Aiden titled his head at the wording, and Lucas cringed after he’d spoken.
“By sleep I mean actual sleep, nothing fishy, or sexual.” Lucas elaborated.
“How do you know?” Aiden asked.
Lucas balked.
Aiden smiled at his concerned glances between the couch and him. “You’re surprisingly easy to mess with.”
Lucas leaned against the counter and pouted for a moment, then slid off his stool. “I’m making you breakfast.”
“I don’t get a choice?”
“I was going to offer” Lucas rubbed his shoulder as he walked past, “But you’re being mean, so no, you don’t get a choice.”
Aiden sipped his now-cold tea. It took every ounce of willpower he possessed not to smile, and even then, he slipped up a lot. But it was okay. He was always answered with a grin from Lucas when their gazes met.
*
“I had to listen to you two flirt all morning” Connor said, “Can someone else please make the popcorn?”
“What does that have to do with anything?” Aiden frowned at him. Evie and Lucas were just setting the covers out for their movie night. Evie didn’t think much of Connor’s comment, but Lucas narrowed his eyes at him. Aiden found himself not reacting as harshly as he thought he would. He was used to it, maybe.
“Compensation.” Connor stated.
“Anyone who thinks Connor should make the popcorn raise your hand.” Evie flopped into her spot and threw her arm up.
Aiden joined her and knew from Connor’s glare that Lucas had too. Connor grumbled and got up, stalking into the kitchen. Evie giggled.
The storm outside continued to batter on the windows, the sound getting louder as the wind picked up. Tom couldn’t drive Aiden into town right now, even if he wanted to.
“Is Kal coming out?” Aiden asked Lucas.
“He’s doing something on his laptop.”
“Oh.”
Lucas scrunched his nose and nudged his shoulder. “Don’t imagine weird things.”
Aiden chuckled. “I only said ‘oh’ and wasn’t imagining anything. I am now.”
“Stop.”
“Why? Will it make you jealous?” Aiden asked.
Lucas jaw tightened. He looked away from Aiden to the tv, with tension in his body. “No.”
Aiden snorted.
“I said ‘no’.”
“I heard you, and don’t believe you.” Aiden put his chin on Lucas’s tense shoulder. “Don’t worry, I promise only to imagine ‘weird’ things about …”
“About?” Lucas asked lowly, his gaze flicking to Aiden with a glazed quality to it.
Aiden smirked, and Lucas squirmed, tilting his body to Aiden. “Tell me.” He insisted.
Connor crossed the room with popcorn, and practically threw it into their laps. Aiden had to straighten up to keep it level. “Ready to press play?”
Lucas nudged his leg and asked against for Aiden to tell him. Aiden didn’t. He relaxed for the movie, keenly aware of where Lucas pressed against him, and then nervous when Lucas joined their hands under the blanket.
Lucas leaned into during one of the musical scores they used to listen to. “Remember when he jumped between the beds pretending to be the dragon?”
“Remember when I knocked over the lamp and you jumped onto the shards?” Aiden whispered back.
Lucas smiled as if he were recalling a pleasant memory. “I had to get three stitches.”
Aiden didn’t know if he cried during the visit to the doctor, but as soon as he’d seen the blood covering his foot he started bawling. “You were such a cry baby”
“Shh” Lucas looked worriedly in Connor’s direction. “He doesn’t need to hear that.”
Aiden saw that Connor and Evie were both giving them a ‘shut up’ stare. He complied and focused on the tv again. Kal joined them as the third movie neared its end, and the light faded from the sky without the rain letting up.
*
Little pools of water on the leaves flicked onto him as he passed, and his boots gathered the dew stuck on the grass. Whenever he looked behind him he could see that the others were getting wet too. Lucas purposefully batted at the twigs as he passed.
Their gazes met for a second, and Lucas beamed. Proudly.
Aiden looked away and continued. He’d been talked into the camping trip, and when he’d pointed out that he had to go to the doctor, he’d been talked into leaving a note and sneaking out with them. He knew he was going to be in trouble for that, so he was determined that this trip would be worth it.
“Is your arm holding up okay?” Lucas trotted up the path to him.
“I’m not exactly using it right now.” Aiden adjusted his pack. His wrist hurt a little. The muscles had started aching once they got outside. “How’s Kal?” He peeked back. Kal came up last with a pair of headphones stuck on and his nose buried in his phone.
“I don’t know why he wanted to come so badly when all he wanted was to watch Netflix.” Lucas looked too with a crinkled-up nose.
“He’s not watching it now is he?”
“A new show came out.” Lucas shrugged. “But what about you?”
“How am I?” Aiden asked, not entirely sure what Lucas wanted.
“What made you change your mind?”
Aiden shot Lucas a look, and the boy chuckled. “Aside from my badgering.”
“I’m not ready to go back into town.” Aiden answered.
Lucas smile vanished. “Hugh isn’t going to bother you again. I’ll make sure of it.”
Aiden was surprised, and struggled to reign in his hopes with something closer to reality. It was nice that Lucas said that. “Actually” Aiden looked away, “It’s because I’m enjoying myself here that I don’t want to go back.”
“Oh.” Lucas looked embarrassed for a second, and then he smiled. Softly. Shyly. “Any particular reason?”
Aiden peeked at the hopeful, puppy dog eyes pointed towards him. His heart melted a little. A desire to push himself against Lucas, and pull their lips together surged through him. Aiden’s fingers twitched, and he quickly looked away, startled by his own thoughts.
“One.” Aiden admitted, “There’s one reason.”
Lucas brushed the back of his hand against Aiden’s, briefly sharing his warmth. “Me too.” He added softly.
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