As I stood on the other side of my door I got so tired all of a sudden, maybe it was due to eating an insane amount of food or it may have been that I was at my social limit for the day. I slowly made my way into my bathroom and cranked up the heat as far as it would go and stood in the shower for what felt like an hour, it helped bring my anxiety down a little. I brushed my hair and got ready for bed, hoping that things would go back to normal. I didn't want a neighbor who came to visit all the time, or a coworker who wanted to hang out, I just wanted to be alone. I didn't need anyone. I was fine. It was with these thoughts that I drifted off to sleep.
As I walked in to work the next day, I was hesitant. I didn't want Ryan to think we were friends now, I specifically placed my face in my expressionless mask and walked in. I walked up to my locker put my bag in, clocked in, and walked up to the front desk. Most people didn't look my way anymore and I was happy with that, I didn't need any fake people trying to pry their way into my life. I started sorting through my work for the day when I felt someone walk up beside me, "Hey Alex," he said, "I'm sorry but I need you to work on this inventory." I turned around and there was Ryan, normal as could be.
"Alright, I'll get to it now" I said. I waited for the inevitable chit-chat I was sure was coming, but he just smiled and walked on. I couldn't believe it, I exhaled a sigh of relief. I started my work and made it through the day, just a nice normal day. As I was finishing up my work a guy about my age walked up to me. He was a normal looking guy blonde wavy hair and brown eyes, about 6 ft and he wore khaki pants and a brand name polo.
"Hello sir, anything I can help you with?" I asked in my normal monotone.
"Uh, ya hey, can I have your number?" he said. Of course this used to happen a lot when I first got hired, random guys asking me out. The answer was always no. I used to try to be a little more polite about it but it's just so annoying. Granted it hadn't happened in a while and I was grateful.
As I was opening my mouth to give my curt reply Ryan yelled for me to check on something for him. Bless that man. Not only could he sense I didn't want to talk to him about the previous night, he knew when I was being bothered.
"Oh you're busy sorry, I'll just go" the guy said and he walked away. I almost ran over to Ryan.
"Sorry," he said, "I could tell that guy was bothering you, you ok?"
"Yes, thank you." I could have hugged him, but touching just isn't something that I do.
"Alright, go on home then. Have a good night Alex." Ryan said returning to his work.
"You too," I said as I made my way towards the time clock. I had made it through the day and that was all I wanted. It hadn't been completely normal, but this was alright. I quickly got to my car and drove to my apartment. I changed out of my work clothes as soon as I could, put on some music and sat down to read my favorite book. Nice and normal.
Then came the knock at the door.
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