When I was asleep, I dreamed. It was a strange dream, one like I hadn`t seen before. The space inside the dream was white and misty, with nothing else there, except for two people. Me…and Koh. In the dream, I could understand every word that Koh said, and he could understand all of mine, not just some. “Why can I understand you now?” I asked him. He shrugged. “Because this is a dream. Things can be accomplished in dreams like nowhere else.” `Things? `
Before I could ask, Koh started talking, and he told me about so many wonderful and interesting things from years past, not just here, but the place he`d come from as well, the little he could remember. And in the white mist, he could show me pictures of what he remembered. Colorful places, forests, a river….all places that I had never seen, since I had only just left the cottage for the first time. But Koh knew that, and he showed me as much as he could remember, the places and people, though none of the people had faces. When I asked about that, Koh seemed frustrated. “I cannot remember.” He replied. “I have tried and tried and yet, I cannot remember anything before we met.” He looked at me. “But I think…that I was looking for you.”
Even in the dream space, I took a step back. Mother had always warned me about that! And since it was only a dream and he understood, I told him that. “I didn`t mean to hurt you before. I will not hurt you again,” Koh said gently. “I promise.” Promises were important… And Koh hadn`t hurt me since that first time…
When he asked, I told Koh about living with mother, the sameness of all the days, and that he was only the second person I`d met in my entire life, and how nervous that made me, despite the fact that I didn`t want to be alone. And when that led to remembering mother`s death, he held me gently while I cried, even though it was a dream. In the dream he rocked me soothingly while I was remembering mother, and that my home was now gone. And he didn`t hurt me.
When I woke up, I was still in Koh`s arms, and he was watching me. We were laying on the grass under an overhang in the rocks. I glanced around and saw that we were back in the ravine. But I had no desire to move—it was raining. Still a little cold, I burrowed against him, as long as we were laying together anyway. His arms tightened a little. He was warm, even though normally someone out in the rain like him, half naked, would feel cold to another. Mother had always felt cold when she came back from shopping on a rainy day, and said it was because she had been outside. “…You’re not cold?” I asked, glancing up a little to see his face. The slight change in expression seemed to question Cold? He didn`t understand. “Cold.” I reiterated my point with a shiver. “It`s cold.”
There was no response. Mother`s bracelet was cutting into my hand, I had held it so hard while I slept. So I moved it to my pocket instead, hands following as I remembered that they`d be warmer in the pockets than out. Koh`s eyes widened just a tiny drop, so little that if I hadn’t been watching him I wouldn’t have noticed. He hadn`t known about the pockets? He reached over, and since he was gentle, I let him lift one of my hands from the pocket so that he could study it. I didn`t want to get hurt again. The amount of scars mother had had had always scared me. But…after that one time, Koh hadn`t hurt me. Maybe…maybe it had been an accident? In my dream he had promised not to hurt me again…and in the dream he had sounded like he was telling the truth. But a dream was just a dream…wasn`t it?
Was it possible? That it had been an accident that he had hurt me? He had been gentle and calm like mother since then… gentle and calm more times than he had hurt me. So maybe…maybe…it had been an accident…He put his hand in my pocket, exploring how big the pocket was, then took his hand out and put mine back in. How useful! His expression seemed to say. I nodded in response. Pockets were very useful.
Still tired, with nothing but rain, and nowhere to go, I stayed curled up against him for warmth, hand in my pocket holding tight to mother`s bracelet, and fell asleep again, watching the rain I had never seen so close before.
My stomach growling woke me up a while later, when the rain had lightened. Hearing that, Koh bit his wrist again, and held it out to me. Drink. I shook my head, and pulled away. Koh let me, watching as I sat up, careful of the low roof. I didn`t need to hit my head! It wasn`t quite as low as I`d thought though, and both Koh and I could sit easily, but because Koh was taller, his head almost brushed against the roof. Koh had copied me and sat up as well, and now he held his wrist out again. I shook my head again. I didn`t want to. One time hadn`t seemed to hurt me, but I didn`t drink blood! I needed food. But Koh did the same thing he had done before, putting his bleeding wrist where I could smell it. And once I smelled the sweet scent, even though I didn`t want to drink blood, I sort of did want to. Koh watched me, and when I automatically leaned towards the sweet scent, just a little, he put his wrist to my mouth.
Yummy. But because drinking blood was weird, despite the nice taste, I pulled away after only a minute. Koh let me, and I watched as he licked the bite-mark on his wrist. My eyes widened as I watched the cut heal. Curious and startled, I grabbed his arm, to see, and he let me, staying still. I ran a finger over the spot the bite had been…but there wasn`t even a tiny bit that was raised. As if he had never bitten himself in the first place. But by the sweet taste still at the back of my throat, I knew that he had. Despite her magic, mother had never been able to heal wounds. And I certainly couldn’t!
Was he really a vampire? I tried to remember what mother had told me so long ago. Something about how vampire legends…came from…they came from…demons! Demons existed, and when summoned here, were required to drink blood. Mother had told me lots about demons. About how some of them were wild, like animals, and some were more like people. Mostly they were like people, at least the ones who lived here, on Earth. From the descriptions of animals I`d read in books, Koh seemed more like that though. There had never been animals near the cottage, except, sometimes, birds, and Koh was nothing like a bird.
I tilted my head and looked at him. “…Are you a demon, Koh?” I asked. Would he answer that? …demon…? He tilted his own head in response, but didn`t seem to completely understand the question. I studied him. I thought maybe he was. But all the books I could have referenced…none of them had been there when we had gone back to the cottage…even the books had been gone…
I…my home was gone. I didn`t know why, or how, but something had ruined it. And mother was gone. Which meant…which meant…Koh was the only thing I knew now. I had only known him a couple of days—and he had hurt me once—but…but…I didn`t have anything else. I didn`t want to be alone. And he seemed to be gentle now. His hurting me had probably been an accident, I decided. I looked away from Koh and into the clearing. And he had promised not to hurt me again, even if it had only been in a dream.
Maybe I would trust that dream. Mother had used to true-dream about people and things. Things that hadn`t happened yet but would. I had never had that ability, but...it had felt real, for all that there had only been white mist for a surrounding.
Comments (0)
See all