The new day brought with it much of the same. Queen Vanessa, or Queen Vanity as Stefan had decided to start calling her, began the day in a fit about her clothing. Something about the colors not matching her nails or the soles of her shoes not being spotless. The latter was a genuine head scratcher for Stefan, who reasoned that it would be impossible for the soles of any shoe, not just hers, to be spotless, on account of it always touching the dirt on the ground. Queen Vanity appeared not to have considered such a thing, however, as she went around the house yelling at anyone she could find. He guessed it was around eight or nine in the morning when Sophie finally came to his room to find him. To his surprise, she had another baby boy in her arms. She set the baby down in his crib and then picked him up. “Your turn, Theodore,” she said as she offered him her breast.

He suckled her nipple, and though he still found the experience odd, he was nevertheless starting to get acclimated to his new body and situation. The good night’s sleep had done wonders for his psyche and his analytical mind had begun compartmentalizing his thoughts, storing away his discomforts, sadness, and doubts. Whether it was because he had a natural inclination for such things, or because of his time as an engineer (it really was a chicken-egg kind of situation), Stefan had begun to break down the challenge at hand- finding a way home to his family- into smaller, more comprehensible parts. This allowed him to focus on things that he could control, while letting go of those he couldn’t, a strategy he had learned long ago and often employed to reduced his emotional stress.

Reflecting upon the challenge before him, Stefan concluded that there were two major points in what the god of the multiverse had told him. The first was that he had been reincarnated into this new parallel universe for a reason. That reason, the god of the multiverse had claimed, was to unite the world and be its savior. But the vagueness of his supposed destiny had immediately brought about a slew of unanswered questions. For example, why was he specifically chosen? And had he been the only one? Why had the god of the multiverse chosen that moment in time? And why only this planet out of an entire multiverse?

Stefan had many such questions, but he quickly stopped himself before he tripped down the rabbit hole. He recognized that those were the sorts of questions that were of little use to ponder, for there was no possible way to find the answer, besides asking the god of the multiverse directly. Dwelling on them, Stefan knew from experience, would only drive him crazy or into despair, or both. And so he stored the questions away, somewhere deep in the recesses of his mind, with a mental note to recall them if he ever had the chance to speak with the god of the multiverse again.

Moving away from the unanswerable, Stefan instead focused on those for which he could conceivable discover an answer. The immediate ones that came to mind were questions such as, what was this parallel world like? how big was it? what was its current state of affairs? what did it need saving from? These questions, Stefan reasoned, he could unravel should he simply be attentive to his surroundings and keep an open ear. Given his newly acquired baby form, he was sure those around him would be loose-lipped and off-guard, which would make eavesdropping, well, childsplay. He may even be able to find some books or a library from which to conduct research. Or, he didn’t even dare hope, maybe there was some kind of internet in his new world.

Probably not, Stefan thought to himself. But his internal musing had put his mind somewhat at ease. He took comfort in his own analytical prowess and suddenly, the goal while still impossibly far away, seemed just a bit more hopeful.

“Someone’s a happy baby today,” Sophie said as she rocked Stefan back and forth in her arms. She had noticed Stefan’s smile and mirrored one of her own as her deep blue eyes crinkled with joy.

Looking at Sophie’s expression, Stefan realized that his caregiver seemed even younger than she had appeared the night before. He had assumed she was in her early twenties, but now he wasn’t so sure. She looked eighteen, maybe nineteen. Stefan tried to remember what he had been like at eighteen, what Jeanne had been like. Jeanne had been the more mature of the two of them, but even then they had both still acted like immature children. He couldn’t imagine having to take care of a baby at eighteen, let alone two.

The sudden memory of Jeanne brought forth a deep feeling of homesickness and further reminded Stefan of the second point the god of the multiverse had given. The god of the multiverse had warned him that, if he were to have any chance of seeing his family again, he would need to accomplish his task in the new world before his new life came to an end. In essence, there was a time limit. Fortunately, he was starting out as a baby rather than an old man, but the question still remained, just how much time did he have? Assuming he did not die of illness or accident, and those were big ifs, how much time could he conceivable expect? What was the average life expectancy of beings in his new world? Was it comparable to Earth? Did that mean fifty years? Seventy? One hundred? More?

From what Stefan had seen so far of both Sophie and Queen Vanity, the two appeared human, in whatever ways one may have characterized a human from Earth. In fact, had he not been told directly by the god of the multiverse itself that he would be reincarnated in a different world, Stefan might have very well assumed that he had simply taken the wrong exit on the interstate, and ended up in some historical renaissance re-creation site. Well, the god of the multiverse telling him as much, and the fact that he was a baby again.

But back to the point, Stefan couldn’t help but notice how eerily similar his new world appeared when compared to Earth. While it did feel a few hundred years the primitive, much of the mannerisms and materials were structurally the same. For one, there was the language, distinctively English, and the idiomatic expressions, which he had no trouble understanding. For another, there was the clothing which, despite the frills, flounces, ruffs and crinolines characteristic of the renaissance time period, was made of familiar cotton and linen material. Even the very architecture of the house he was in, with its grand arches, marble pillars and polished oak floors, seemed copied directly from Earth. He knew that the planet was supposed to be parallel to Earth, and so some amount of similarity was to be expected, but the sheer degree to which it mirrored Earth surprised him. Stefan wondered if the similarities would continue to hold true outside, beyond the boundaries of his current environment and throughout his new world.

A sudden nudge on his stomach pulled Stefan out of his thoughts. He looked up to see that it was Sophie, prodding him with a finger. “Are you still hungry, Theodore?” she asked. He gave her a silly giggle in reply, still quite unable to manipulate his tongue into words. But as he giggled away, a sudden thought occurred to him. Supposing a year from now, he “learned” to talk, just how much should he say? He was, as far as anyone was concerned, a baby after all. Stefan tried to imagine the face Queen Vanity might make if he started sprouting postulates about quantum mechanics and string theory in a year. While it was an amusing thought, Stefan quickly shook the idea away. He had seen enough movies to know how overly precocious children were treated. At best, they were stigmatized, at worst, vilified like some demonspawn. In my case though, the latter is very nearly true, Stefan thought. He giggled at his own joke, with enough force that he momentarily lost control of his bowels.

“Oh, did Theodore make poo poo?” Sophie asked. She lifted him up, took a whiff of his behind, and then in dramatic fashion, announced, “Poo poo!”

Stefan was thoroughly embarrassed at having literally shit himself and then having someone point it out in such a demeaning fashion. But he forced himself to giggle anyways, as he assumed that’s how a real baby would respond. The sound that came out of his mouth was an awkward croaking noise, resembling a frog, but Sophie seemed not to notice. She moved him to a different room and filled a small tub with water before undressing him and placing him inside. She was just in the middle of washing his hair when Queen Vanity stormed in.

“There you are, Sophie-” she started to say. But then suddenly her face formed a scowl. Scrunching her nose, she asked, “What is that absolutely wretched smell?”

“My apologies, Queen Vanessa. Theodore had just soiled himself and I’m washing him up,” Sophie replied. With her free hand, she tried to push the soiled diaper across the table, further away from the queen, but the disdained expression never left the queen’s face.

In the meanwhile, Stefan had been staring at Queen Vanity, for the first time able to get a full sense of the queen’s appearance. With the ambient sunlight shining on her through the open window, Stefan had to admit that the queen did look quite attractive, beautiful even. She had a noble elegance with her sharp cheekbones, thin nose and arching eyebrows. And her features were further highlighted by the deep maroon lipstick she wore, which contrasted sharply with her pale skin and curly blonde hair. The only mar on her beauty was her expressions, the coldness of her eyes and the pursing of her lips which revealed the ugliness of her personality.

Stefan watched as Queen Vanity lifted her arm and held out a small suit made of blue and gold silk. With her free hand, she pointed to Stefan and said, “Put him in this, and make it quick. His Highness is scheduled to arrive soon.”

Sophie stared in awe at the luxurious suit, hesitant to even reach out to take it for fear she might dirty or damage it. Finally, after much irritated prodding by the queen, Sophie wiped her hand on her clothes and took the suit. She held it up, admiring the way the gold silk sparkled in the light, and said, “It’s absolutely lovely, Queen Vanessa.”

Queen Vanity scoffed and rolled her eyes. “Of course it is, Sophie. Do you know how much I paid for this? Just for, for-,” she paused and gestured at the baby several times, “-for-”

“Theodore?” Sophie said meekly.

Instantly, Queen Vanity’s hand swung forward, slapping Sophie’s cheek with a loud snap. “I know what my own son’s name is, Sophie!” the queen screamed.

Sophie looked down and bowed her head, her dirty blonde hair falling to cast a shadow over her face. “My apologies, Queen Vanessa,” she said.

The queen seemed not to acknowledge her. In the same irritated tone she had used before, she said, “Now make sure he’s dressed. And no more crying. Heaven knows I can’t deal with the crying and snot.” Then with that final command, she stormed out.

After the queen left, Sophie carefully placed the silk suit to the side and continued bathing Stefan. She was looking down at him, and so he had a clear view of where the queen had hit her. The skin was a bright pink and slightly raised. Sophie herself seemed not to notice, however. She was humming softly, a gentle expression on her face. Stefan recognized it as the lullaby she had sung to him the night before.

As she was entering the chorus of the lullaby, Sophie suddenly stopped, her mouth opening slightly. “Theodore?” she whispered in surprise. At the sound of his name, Stefan suddenly realized that he had been brooding. He didn’t know what kind of expression he had had on his face, but it must have been unnatural enough to cause Sophie quite the shock. He quickly tried to think of a happy memory, or one of Jeanne’s terrible puns. Suddenly, Jeanne’s voice echoed in his head, Did you know that tuna is the saltiest fish? 2 N-A? Get it? The memory of Jeanne’s quirky, yet cute laughter caused Stefan to let out a loud giggle, and Sophie seemed to relax. “I must have been imagining it,” he heard her whisper to herself as she continued with the task at hand.

Once he was fully bathed and dressed, Sophie carried him to a room he had not been in before. One glance showed that it was a waiting room of sorts. Sophie carried him to a makeshift highchair on the far end of the room and then set him down gently before standing up and taking a step back. It looked like she was about to leave, but she kept hesitating, turning her head back and forth between Stefan and the door.

Stefan gave her a giggle, and the shrill laughter seemed to alleviate her concerns somewhat. Finally, Sophie walked back to the entrance, lingered for another second, then closed the door behind her.