Dear Diary.....

Today is a beautiful day. And I’ve decided to take a small vacation.

I plan to head down to the beach and relax this time. 

I heard of this placed called Manitou Beach, an ocean in the middle of this flat prairie called Saskatchewan. There's even an indoor swimming resort!

Many celebrities often visit there... Surely they would accept a Fairy Queen!

I have checked the weather on my Ethereal Net Drive. Forecast: Sunny 24/7.

A perfect time to concentrate on my tan lines. 

I'll be meeting with delegates from the Dark Elf colony. I should look the part.

Now, I wonder.

Which bathing suit should I wear?

The frilly one-piece peaches and cream? This two piece that screams Orca?

Or perhaps this dental floss?... No, I would look stupid wearing only strings.

...................F**k it. I'll bring all of them.

One for each day of the week to match the mood. Yes, I'm a f**king genius.

Now to open the door and off I--

--WHAT THE F**K!?

ROMEO! JULIET! 

I TOLD YOU THOUSANDS OF TIME IN THOUSANDS OF ALTERNATE REALITIES, FOR THOUSANDS OF CENTURIES!

STOP DOING IT AGAINST MY TREEHOUSE!!

WHAT ARE YOU BUNNIES (>///<)!?

Now put your pants and skirt back on and GET THE F**K OUT!

…………….

AND FOR THE 100,000th TIME! 

STOP INVITING ME TO JOIN YOU! I’M NOT THAT KIND OF FAIRY QUEEN!!