Tuesday, October 9th

The day Jesse got his tattoo was one for the history books, since he had reached an all-time low. Yes, he had wanted this tattoo for years, and yes he had been saving up his paychecks to be able to pay for it, but he could’ve waited for about nine months until he turned 18 and could legally decide on getting a tattoo himself. He wouldn’t have needed his parents’ permission—which he would never get.

Which meant he wouldn’t have gone through so much trouble to get a fake ID, One which was expensive as hell because it needed to look very realistic in case they’d ask for him to ID himself. They didn’t.

Now, Jesse had a fake ID that was hardly distinguishable from a real one, and a tattoo that covered all of his lower right arm.

And he was grounded for a month because of it. Not that Jesse cared about being grounded. He wasn’t planning on staying home for a month and listening to his father shading him every time he got a chance, grounded or not.

Even if Jesse was grounded, he still left the house as much as usual.

But none of it matter to him, since it impressed Calix. And impressing Calix was worth everything to Jesse. As long as he could do things to impress Calix—or get his attention—he wasn’t going to let anything stop him from doing them.

Impressing Calix was also the only reason Jesse was still part of the soccer team. Together with a guy named Ferdi, they formed a solid offence, with Calix as their best player and top scorer. It was worth all the muddy practices and rainy soccer matches during the weekend, just to be there to celebrate every goal Calix managed to score.

Jesse was a decent soccer player himself, and he took most assists on his account, enabling Calix to make all those goals. And every time he gave the assist, Calix would run up to him first to celebrate the goal. A part of Jesse lived for those short moments in which they would share a brotherly hug and a few cheers, pumping fists in the air together.

But the best moment ever was when Jesse himself managed to score a goal in somewhat of a miraculous way, and Calix couldn’t stop bragging about the goal on his behalf to anyone who was willing to listen. The proud looks Calix gave him every few minutes on the party they went to afterwards had sparked something inside Jesse that had caused him to get addicted to it.

He wanted Calix to be proud of their friendship all the time. He wanted Calix to be impressed by him every day. It gave him hope that there was something inside Calix. Something small, a part that liked him the same way he liked Calix.

It had grown into a small obsession; hence the fact that Jesse took his tattoo two weeks after the day Calix had told people that he thought tattoos were cool, and that, one day, he would get one. Now Jesse had one, and every so often—ever since Jesse had showed off his new tattoo—Calix would yank his arm towards him to admire the piece of art.

And every time Calix touched him to admire the tattoo, his skin tingled. He was on fire completely, and it was only a matter of time until he would combust right in front of Calix.

Talk about being whipped.

“Dude!” Roy sat down beside him on the step of the stairs leading to the locker rooms. “I heard you got a tattoo. Calix was talking about it.”

Jesse couldn’t fight the smirk on his face, proud because Calix had told Roy about him and his tattoo. He hadn’t seen Roy in a while, and he was one of the few people who still hadn’t seen it, which was why Jesse pulled up the sleeve of his hoodie to show him the design.

“That’s so awesome. I can’t believe your parents agreed to it!” Roy traced a flower that was part of the sleeve with his finger.

“Who says they did?” Jesse chuckled and shrugged. “Johan got me a fake ID.”

“No way. What did you parents say?”

“The old man was furious. Is furious.” Jesse laughed when he remembered his father’s face when he first saw the tattoo. Jesse didn’t even show it on purpose. He just hadn’t thought about it when he had pulled up his sleeves before picking up the plates to put them in the dishwasher.

If it was up to Jesse, his parents wouldn’t even have found out until summer; when he turned 18.

“You’re such a king.” Roy laughed and shook his head in a way that told Jesse he couldn’t really believe Jesse had done such a thing. But he knew Jesse well enough to know it was exactly the kind of thing he would do.

“And when are you getting a new hair-colour?” Roy ruffled his hair before lighting a cigarette. “It’s a bit washed-out.”

“Oh, I don’t know.” Jesse lolled his head, and then went through his hair with one hand. “I’m not sure what colour to do this time.”

“What about purple?”

“Possibly.”

“Didn’t you already have purple during summer?” Calix’ voice made Jesse’s stomach flutter, and when Calix too ruffled up his hair he wanted to melt right in his spot. But he couldn’t let him know that, right?

“I was thinking about pink. You know, since nobody expects me to get pink hair.” Jesse scooted sideways, to offer Calix a place to sit right next to him. “What do you think?”

“Pink would definitely be cool.” Calix nodded in agreement. “Do pink, yeah,” he told Jesse while grabbing a cigarette. “Now, can you please take a shower? I want to go. Francesca is waiting at home.”

Ugh. Francesca.

Francesca had been Calix’ girlfriend for over two years, and they were still too close for comfort. She spent half her nights at his place and he spent the other half of the week at her place. Jesse felt nauseous whenever he thought about them together. He didn’t want Calix to go back home to his girlfriend and cuddle up with her, kiss her in the loving way he always did. Possibly even…

Don’t think about that, Jesse.

Jesse stood up anyway. Calix had asked him to shower, and he simply couldn’t say no. Even if he knew it would shorten the time he had with him in his company.

Thankfully, Calix never noticed the fact that Jesse was deliberately postponing his showers at the soccer club to avoid being around a naked Calix. Oh, he would love to see Calix in his Adam’s costume, definitely. He just couldn’t risk getting a boner because of it.

No, Jesse would keep postponing his showers, for the sake of his reputation—which was a straight guy with humour, who did whatever the hell he wanted.

Not a gay guy who was crushing on his straight best friend.

And he wanted to keep it that way.

     Jesse was pretty deep in thought while him and Axel rode the last part of the way to their homes. Calix had taken a left a few minutes ago, since he lived in a different part of town, while Axel actually lived in the same street as Jesse.

“You think we can do a gaming night soon?” Axel asked out loud, shortly turning his head to look at Jesse. “I mean, you’re still grounded for another two weeks, but still.”

“Oh, it got extended for another two weeks since I left to go out last weekend.” Jesse forced a chuckle out. “But we could do a gaming night at your place. I’ll find a way to escape.”

“Off course you do,” Axel laughed. “I’m surprised your old man hasn’t putten any bars in front of your window.”

“If he would, I can still leave through the door.”

“Lock on your door would be good to keep you inside too,” Axel nodded in agreement. “I have a theory. Your parents want to be angry and ground you, but secretly they don’t mind the way you are. They just do what they think they’re supposed to do.”

Jesse let out a roaring laugh, knowing how far away from the truth Axel actually was. His father didn’t like the way he acted. His father didn’t even like him as a person to begin with, which was why Jesse never listened to him. His father would always complain he did things wrong anyway, even if he did them the exact same way any of his three brothers did them.

“So, my place, Friday?”

“If you can talk Calix into it. You know how he is with going to bed on time for the match on Saturday. And it’s actually a pretty important match this week.”

“True, but we go out on Saturday. Rumours say Donna will be there and I just…”

“You want her back.” Jesse nodded. “It’s not going to happen, I’m telling you.”

“And I keep telling you that you need to dump Yoni. She’s no good for you. But you don’t listen to me either.”

“Isn’t that the whole reason to be friends in the first place? To give shitty advice the other won’t listen to anyway, only so we can say ‘I told you so’ and laugh about it afterwards?”

“That’s one way to define friendship, yeah.” Axel laughed again. “Anyway, this is my stop. I’ll see you in school tomorrow.”

Jesse waved a hand and rode the last part on his bike a bit slower. Anything to postpone coming home to angry parents and annoying brothers.

Jesse already knew he wasn’t going to live at home for much longer. As soon as he was 18 and he could rent a room on his own, he’d leave and never look back. But it was nine more months until he turned 18 and for the time being, he tried to go out of the house as much as possible.

Even if it meant his parents would be even angrier once he came back to show his face.

He couldn’t wait for Saturday to go out, find a guy to hook up with and stay out for the whole night. Even though he didn’t have any success finding a hook-up lately, since his friends wouldn’t let him leave to secretly visit a gay bar.

Maybe it was time for him to start up a Grindr again, and just head over to a hook-up as soon as the rest was heading home. If only he knew a way to ditch Axel instead of having to drop him off at home first. That would definitely make a difference in time.

For now, he just needed to keep quiet while he used the backdoor to enter the house, and sneak up the small set of stairs in the back of the house. He was lucky that his parents had bought two houses and made it into one big one, since he always had a shortcut to get to his room without alarming his parents, who slept in the other part of the house, using the main stairs in the main hallway.

Jesse had deliberately picked the room furthest away from them, and not just because the room actually had two separate parts one of which he could use as a game room, and one for actual sleeping.

Then again, none of his brothers wanted to remodel the room, since it had been a straight up mess when they bought the house, and it even needed to be isolated before it was usable. Jesse still thanked his friends for helping him clear the job.

Still, he’d rather have a 3 by 3-meter room in total, as long as it wasn’t in this house. Anything to get away and regain some freedom.