Saturday, October 13th

     There were plenty of things his friends didn’t need to know. And the fact he told Yoni a little about his relationship—or the lack thereof—with his father, was a rare thing for him to do. Being gay surely wasn’t something that she, or anyone for that matter, would ever be able to pry out of him. Well, not the people he considered friends.

Jesse had a long list of hookups with guys, and in the heat of the moment, Jesse felt better than he ever did. But afterwards, while he woke up, his still felt shitty for cheating on Yoni, even if he considered their relationship to be fake.

And since Yoni was still acting weird on Friday during school—as if she knew more than he told her—he had mostly ignored her calls after school, sending one simple text to tell her that he was having a guys night at Axel’s place, to cheer him up after being dumped by Donna.

The night had been great, and they had a lot of fun. They slept over at Axel’s place like they usually did after a game night at one of their places, and the next day they had gone to soccer together.

Calix scored two amazing goals, and midfielder Gerald had scored a third goal, leading them to victory yet again. They were unbeatable that season. They were on fire. And Jesse was on fire since Calix had celebrated his goals mostly with him.

But now it was Saturday night, and it was their usual night to go out. Jesse had managed to sneak out of the house and had gone over to their regular club, using his real ID to get inside. He wasn’t allowed to drink legally, but the bartenders never seemed to care and poured alcohol to anyone who was asking.

While Yoni and Francesca mostly hung out with Donna and some of their other friends, Jesse had started binge drinking along with Axel, ending up drunk within no time.

“One more, Jesse!” Axel lolled his head, slamming a hand on the bar, before gripping it to stay upright. “One.”

“As if you can handle more.” Jesse laughed, and ignored the look of disapproval from Calix, who wasn’t really into getting drunk that much. Jesse ordered another round of shots for Axel, himself and two other guys called David and Chester.

They downed the shot after a round of cheers, and Jesse grabbed hold of David to prevent from falling over.

“Don’t you guys think you’ve had enough?” Calix took his hand away from David, and steadied Jesse in a pose that enabled him to look at Jesse. “You’re wasted.”

Jesse stared into Calix’ bright blue eyes, trying to come up with a witty answer. But his in alcohol drenched mind didn’t offer him any answer at all. If only Calix would end up drunk out of his mind for once. Maybe, just maybe, then Jesse would stand a chance.

But he didn’t and he shrugged Calix’ hands off his shoulders eventually. “Live a little.” He told Calix with a drunk smirk on his face. “You’re young.”

“And I’m having fun.” Calix chuckled. “You’ll never change.” He shook his head, patted his shoulder and let go of him the second Francesca showed up by their side.

“Hi honey.” She greeted him cheerfully. “Want to dance?”

“Sure, sweety.” Calix smiled warmly at her, and allowed her to grab his hand and guide him towards the dancefloor.

“He’s so fucking whipped it’s getting annoying.” Axel slurred into his ear. “Like, you aren’t glued to Yoni’s side all the time. But they are still acting like love-sick puppies who just found each other.”

“Yeah…” Jesse nodded in agreement, but refrained from voicing his actual thoughts. Like how he wanted to stand in Francesca’s place. And he would act like a love sick puppy for years to come too. Because that’s just what Calix does to others; he turns them into mushy, love-sick puppies who were addicted to his smile, his eyes, his laugh. Francesca and Jesse were far from the only ones who were affected by his charms.

Just like with Axel, there were plenty of girls—and probably guys—who stood in line for Calix, waiting for his relationship to crash and burn.

For a while, he tried to ignore the two love birds on the dancefloor. He tried to have fun with the rest of their friends, but they weren’t hardly as interesting as Calix, and Jesse couldn’t help but look at them every so often.

At some point, he felt like throwing up, when he saw them kiss passionately while still moving around as if they were dancing a bit.

Which was right about the same time Axel started being annoying. He kept asking if he should walk up to Donna and talk to her, or kiss her, or whatever the hell his drunk mind came up with.

Not that long afterwards, Jesse not only was drunk, but highly annoyed by his friends too. He had gone to find Yoni, but when he failed to locate her, he had left the club all together, fishing up his fake ID, heading over to the gay club, Unity, a few blocks away.

He knew none of his friends would go out and look for him after he took his bike away from theirs and parked it somewhere else. They would think he had gone home long before, knowing he was probably too drunk to last much longer.

     Jesse had been at Unity a handful of times before, but never was he allowed inside. It was a strictly 18+ club, and he only possessed his fake ID for a good three weeks now. The past two weeks he had plenty of fun and didn’t want to leave his friends, so he hadn’t tried getting in with the ID before.

He usually found his hookups on Grindr and met them somewhere neutral for a drink to test the waters first. He hadn’t actually ever gone out, drunk, trying to find a guy who looked remotely good enough to hook up with.

That day, he was going to test his luck, trying to get rid of some pent up frustrations that had been building up for a month already. He didn’t really expect to find someone who he would be interested in enough, but it didn’t matter. He was at least going to be able to be himself.

He waited for a while in the chilly October air, wanting to sober up a bit before trying his luck with his ID. He didn’t want to get denied access for being too drunk. Then again, he had reasons to drink enough to end up wasted. It was really difficult to be close to Calix the entire night, in an environment that screamed ‘drink and make out’.

He got in line and had to wait for another five minutes before being able to show his ID and actually get inside the club he thought he would never enter. By the time he’d be 18 for real, he’d be going off for college soon. And neither of the three colleges he applied to, were close to his hometown.

Jesse felt nervous when he had left his coat behind and walked further inside on his own. No friends to escort him, nobody to talk to while getting used to the surroundings. He felt lost, and he must’ve looked lost too.

As soon as he had reached the bar, he ordered a drink, and the bartender shot him a smile.

“First time?”

Jesse looked up from his wallet, while he was waiting to pay for his drink, and swallowed away a lump that was growing in his throat. “Eh, yeah.”

“Welcome home.” The bartender winked, placed a beer on the bar and waved his hand dismissively. “This one is on the house.”

Jesse frowned, but he wasn’t going to decline a free drink. Even if it was for the sole reason his entire being apparently screamed ‘I’m new here’. He downed his drink out of nerves, and took a good look around the club. It wasn’t as big as Gringo’s—their usual club—and there was different music. Not that it was bad, Jesse kinda couldn’t stop himself to move to the beat a little.

But when he glanced around again, he spotted two familiar faces in the crowd, and the shock stopped him from moving all together. He kept his eyes on them, wanting to make sure he was right, and he was actually watching Donna and Yoni, dancing together.

How the hell did they get in? Even more so, why were they in here?

Jesse knew he could just turn around and leave, pretending he never saw them. Or he could walk up to Yoni and ask her why she was there in the first place.

And while he was contemplating which option was best, Yoni just had to turn around. Her eyes found him within seconds, and her head turned beat-red in seconds.

There was no running away now. He was busted by his own girlfriend, while still wondering why said girlfriend was in Unity, the biggest gay club in town.

Donna soon stopped dancing too, following Yoni’s look, her eyes widening when she found him, nailed to the floor in front of the bar.

Before he could run, Yoni made her way towards him, looking guilty as fuck.

“Jesse, why… I mean… did you follow us?” She asked him, grabbing one of his arms to squeeze it pretty hard.

Did he follow them? Did she not think he was here because he wanted to be?

“Why are you here, Yoni?” He asked with a shaky voice. Was she gay? Was she curious? Was she supporting Donna?

“I…” Yoni bowed her head, staring to the floor, while Donna lingered in the background, biting her lip. “I…”

“You?” Jesse frowned, and pushed her head up by her chin. “Are you… into girls?”

“I… I’m… not sure…” She stammered, shortly sending Donna a look. “I haven’t done anything, Jesse. I’m just dancing here.”

“Are you gay?” He bluntly repeated his previous question with clear language. “Or are you bi? Or what the hell is going on?”

“I’ve been… curious for a while now. Donna talked me into going here.” Yoni took in a deep breath, looking like a kicked puppy.

“Do you still like me?”

“Yes…”

“But?”

“I… it’s… complicated.”

Jesse shifted his weight to his other leg, crossing his arms. Though, he couldn’t be mad. He was here for similar reasons. What if Yoni was indeed into girls, and not into him? Could it be that their relationship had been just as much a charade to her too? “Do you like girls, yes or no?”

“Yes.” Yoni eventually admitted. “But I like you too.”

“But not enough.” He concluded, since that was how he felt himself.

“Platonically?” She hesitantly answered, shuffling a foot. “I’ve been interested in… Donna. For a while.”

“Oh, thank god.” Jesse breathed out, his tense shoulders instantly loosening up. His whole body felt lighter. As if the weight of the world had just been lifted off his shoulder. “We need to talk.”

“Are you breaking up with me?”

“I… am not.” He scratched his head, and then pulled her closer. “Can you please tell me you’re actually gay, so I can stop wondering if there’s any chance we can be together in a romantic way?”

“I’m not entirely sure. But I think so, yes.”

“We should see other people.”

“What?” Yoni’s head snapped up and she looked at him in horror. “Jesse I don’t want anyone to know until I figure out things myself.”

“Yoni?” Jesse took in a deep breath, kept it in for a while, glancing around the club shortly, before he looked her in her eyes. “I’m gay.”