You know what I really, really, really hate. Surprises. I suck at surprises. I always ruin them either for myself or for others. Surprise flash mob, hate. Surprise birthday party, hate. A surprise gift, double hate. I hate surprises.

Exhibit A: When I was 10 years old my mom thought it would be fun to surprise us, she said we were going out of town. Turns out we were moving. I cried for the whole trip. Literally the worst surprise ever. Sometimes Oli brings it up just to make fun of me.

Exhibit B: When I was 13 my family tried to throw a surprise birthday party for me. It was Jade’s idea. What did I do? Well in order to get me out of the house I went with Jade and Aunty to the mall. Jade and I decided to horse around in this giant playground the Mall has. We had gotten into it with some kids hogging the slide tunnel, yes we were 13, and yes we were fighting with 7-year-olds. The kid’s mom started yelling at us and kicked us out of the mall, basically shaming us for picking on little kids. I was so upset that when I walked to my house and everyone yelled, Surprise! I vomited on myself. Yep, my mom still has the picture. Despite how many times I’ve tried to get rid of it. Literally the worst.

And finally, Exhibit C: I tried to surprise Jade once for her 15th birthday by taking her to this cool forest hideaway I found down the street. She asked me what we were doing, but I didn’t say anything. She thought I was going to surprise her with a really cool gift. But when she saw it was just the woods she got creeped out and didn’t get it. I tried to explain it to her be she was like, meh. Then she asked if I had gotten her anything. To which I said no. Thus the silent treatment. In the end, I had to get her something, I got a fishbowl and made a replica of our street in it. It took me three days to do. She still has it today.

So what you should take away from that is, I hate surprises. I can never react the way I am supposed to or I completely blow it and ruin everything. Why am I telling you this? Darleen thought it would be great to surprise me on our date. What was the surprise? She took me to the country club where all the rich people hang out.

I was extremely underdressed. So much so that Darleen’s Aunt Matilda who is the owner of like three papers, made Darleen make me go and change. I felt horrified. I was surrounded by all the freaking Grayson’s who were having a family lunch. I did not belong and I was so nervous that the first thing I did was spill my drink on Conroy Grayson, aka the head of the Grayson family and Darleen’s grandfather.

It was red punch, he was wearing white.

Most of the older Grayson’s were giving me the stink eye and looking at Darleen incredulously like they couldn’t believe she actually brought me here. I couldn’t agree more with them. I did not want to be there. To make matters worse Darleen introduced me like this,

“Hello family, nice seeing you all again. This is my girlfriend Skylar. Skylar this is my family.”

Girlfriend? Since when did I become her girlfriend!?

I couldn’t even say hello, I just stuttered and waved.

Kill me now.

Darleen has a total of 12 cousins. 8 girls, and 4 boys. 3 of the girls are our age. Only one boy. The rest of the boys are in their preteens along with 2 of the girls. The rest of the girls are little kids, ranging from ages 5 to 8. She also has three aunts by blood, two by mirage. And two uncles by blood and two by marriage. Two grandmas one being a great grandma. And then her grandfather. All of which whose names I forgot three seconds after learning them. I had to keep asking Darleen what their names were, and they overheard me once and gave me a look.

Literarily the worst date/surprise ever.

By the time lunch was over I had made a complete and utter fool of myself in front of all the Grayson’s. If spilling my drink wasn’t enough, I proceeded to choke on my food and spit it up on the table. Then when they tried to make conversation I said sex instead of vex. They were talking about how to vex their competitors. I said,

“If you want to sex your competitors you should find out what they can’t stand.”

There was a long awkward silence and my face slowly turned a bright red. Darleen was chuckling at me.

If that wasn’t enough of an embarrassment I tried to get up and retreat to the restroom only to bump into the waitress, knock everything over, and slip and fall in the mess.

I hate surprises.

Hate.

I was so humiliated and embarrassed that I just hid away in the restroom till Darleen came to get me and drove us back to school.

“It wasn’t so bad.” She tried.

“Please just stop talking.” I avoided looking at her.

“Skylar.” She pouted.

“I can’t believe that just happened. Oh my god!” I screamed into my backpack.

Darleen laughed at me.

“It’s not funny! I hate you! Oh my god. Forget it, time to crawl in a hole and die.”

“Aw, you are so cute when you are embarrassed.”

“Stop it! I am extremely mad at you right now.” I quickly got out of the car as she parked in the school lot.

“Skylar.” She chased after me.

“No Darleen. I just made a fool of myself in front of the most powerful people in our community. I hate surprises! And since when did I become your girlfriend?”

“Well, I just thought, with us kissing and all that…”

“No! no. nope, no, no, no! Just, no.” I walk away from her.

I have to wipe my tears of embarrassment before anyone can see. I was in such a frantic state that I ran right into Jade.

“Will you slow down.” Darleen chased me.

“Skylar? What’s wrong?” Jade asks.

“Hey, come on. It wasn’t even that bad.” Darleen grabbed my arm.

“That was humiliating!” I whimper.

“What did you do to her!?” Jade growls pulling me away from Darleen.

“Nothing, she’s overreacting.” Darleen sighed.

“Overreacting! I saw your aunt take my picture! She’s gonna put it in her paper and everyone will know what a fool I am.”

“She is not.” Darleen laughed.

“It’s not funny!” I shout.

“Okay, okay, sorry.” She tried to stifle her laughter.

“Hey, you okay?” Jade made me look in her eyes.

“Sure other than the fact I am going to be on the cover of this weeks biggest loser section.” I wiped my tears and stormed off to class.

“Skylar wait!” Darleen chased me.

“Just leave me alone!” I snap at her.

She frowns but obeys.

At practice, Darleen tried to talk to me, but I ignore her the whole time. Then when Jade comes I quickly take a shower and run to her car to get as far away from Darleen as possible.

“So I take it the date didn’t go well?” Jade says as we drive home.

“It was a disaster. She introduced me to her whole freaking family. I made a fool of myself.” I slammed my head into my backpack.

“Yeesh. Like all the Grayson's?” she asked.

“Every. Single. Last. One.”

She just shook her head.

“Ahh!” I screamed into my backpack.

“It’s okay.” She reassured me.

“I’ve never been more humiliated in my entire life,” I say melodramatically.

We pull into her driveway and go into her house. I just feel like curling up in a ball and hiding in my room until winter. How could this happen? Oh yeah because I am a complete dufus that’s how.

“Wanna talk about it?” Jade ask when I just take my usual spot and the floor and hug my knees to my chest, burning a hole in the ground with my eyes.

“No. Never again. I hope that memory gets burned and dies or that I get amnesia and never have to remember how embarrassing I am.”

“Was it that bad?” she cringes.

I look up at her with the look, the look that says, do you really have to ask?

“You should have warned Darleen about how bad you are with surprises.” Jade shakes her head.

“I’m never going to live this down, it was awful.” I bury my head into my knees.

“Hey come on, so what if the Grayson’s are too posh and pretentious, who needs them anyway?” She moves to comfort me, wrapping her arm around me.

“I’ll never be able to show my face in public again.” I sniffle into my knees.

“Shh, so what? Even if the Grayson’s disgrace your name you still have me.”

“Really?” I look up at her.

“Really.” She smiles.

I embrace her in a hug and she pats my back.

“Skylar what am I going to do with you?” She sighs.

Love me.

She pulls back and wipes my tears. Then she helps me to my feet and drags me downstairs where we raid her pantry for girl scout cookies. We take a box of thin mints and Thanks a lots to her room. She knows they are my favorite.

“Okay so enough about your trauma, now for mine!” she says opening the thin mints.

I get ready to hear her babble on for hours.

“I didn’t get the role!” she cried out.

“Aw, Jade.” I pout.

“I know! I thought I nailed it. I got understudy. But it’s not so bad Archer didn’t get the role either. So we can be stagehand buddies together.” She smiles.

She went into her rant about the cast and who got what parts. I just watched her talk. She waved her cookie around dramatically as she talked with her hands. Her eyes going wide as she exclaimed something she thought was unbelievable. A strand of hair fell in her face while she was talking. She’s so pretty. I could just kiss her right now. She really knows how to make me feel better.

I shove cookie after to cookie in my mouth attentively listening to her story and giving my input at the right intervals. She was talking so fast and so dramatically that when she went to take a breath she inhaled her cookie and started choking.

My eyes went wide and I sprang into action. She was clasping at her throat and gasping for air. I grabbed her from behind and gave her the Heimlich maneuver. The cookie shot out of her mouth and stuck to the wall. We stared at it.

Then Jade looked and me and we both started laughing. We watched as it slowly slid down the wall leaving a trail of minty chocolate in its wake.

“You saved my life.” Jade quieted her laughter suddenly realizing how bad this could have turned out.

“What are friends for?” I shrug.

Jade hugged me and I swear my heart exploded inside of me. I felt my face heat up.

When she pulled back she kissed me on the cheek. I turned beet red. She giggled at me as I forced a smile.

“What with all the ruckus in here?” Mackenzie opened the door without knocking.

“None ya,” Jade said.

“Oh so you’re back, I was wondering where you’ve been this past couple of days.” Mackenzie looked at me.

“She’s my friend, get your own.” Jade pulled me close to her possessively.

I felt my face turn even darker.

“Ew, what’s that.” Mackenzie pointed to the wall.

Jade and I looked at each other again before laughing some more.

“Jade!” Aunty called.

“What!?’ Jade yelled back not moving from her spot.

“Letter for you!” Aunty shouted back.

“Ugh,” Jade grunted getting up and walking downstairs leaving me with Mackenzie.

“So were you and Jade fighting or what?” Mackenzie asks.

“It was stupid.” I shrug.

“It’s always stupid. I swear you two can’t fight like normal people.” She shook her head.

Mackenzie doesn’t look like Jade at all. Whereas Jade has sunkissed dark tan skin and jet black hair, Mackenzie has bleach blond hair and pale skin. That’s not her hair’s natural color, she dyes it. It’s actually brown like Aunty. Her eyes are blue so she can pull off the look.

“So… have you told Jade how you feel yet?” She asks after a long pause in silence.

“I don’t know what you are talking about.” I avoid her gaze.

She rolls her eyes.

“Don’t tell her,” I whisper.

“Trust me, that is the last thing I want to do.” She sits next to me.

“Why’s that?” I ask.

Once again she rolls her eyes before leaning in and softly kissing me on the cheek, right where Jade kissed. I feel my face heat up. She looks into my eyes and smiles before leaning in for my lips.

“What are you doing!?” Jade yells at us.

I jump and flinch back.

Mackenzie flinches too.

“N-nothing. I swear. I didn’t, she, and I, it wasn’t…”

“Relax Jade, it was just a joke.” Mackenzie rolls her eyes.

“Get out!” Jade yells pushing her out of the room.

Jade slams the door and I flinch again.

“I didn’t kiss her. She came on to me. I swear. I wasn’t, I didn’t, I mean---”

“It’s okay, trust me I know what a freak my cousin is. I leave you alone for one second and she attacks you!” Jade plopped next to me.

“Hehe.” I force nervous laughter.

“Anyways, I got a letter from my mom.” She sighs, showing me the unopened envelope.

Usually, her dad sends her letters, never her mom.

“Are you going to open it?” I ask.

“Why bother? Haven’t heard or seen her in over ten years.” Jade tosses it to the floor.

“Jade.” I pick the letter up.

“I don’t want to look at it, you open it.” She says.

“Are you sure?” I say.

“Just do it.” She crosses her arms.

With a sigh, I open the letter.