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Extra Caffeine

Too Late

Too Late

Apr 04, 2019

Alina’s (the customer) point of view

My cute little barista was like my personal sun. She was so excited she was practically running laps around me to burn off her nervous energy. I grabbed her hand and intertwined our fingers like a leash to keep her from running off. We walked to a less known ice cream shop called Sprinkles. When we walked in still holding hands I turned to cutie. “What do you want? Ill order.” She paused her in place jogging and smiled at me. “Surprise me!” 

I smiled at her and she froze and stared. I usually never smile but I like the expression on her face when I do. My mom calls me her little goth doll. “Alright cutie, go sit down and wait. I'll go order.” Her courage that seemed to come and go at random, it kicked in and she kissed my cheek and spun around and ran off. I stood there staring after her like an idiot. I pulled myself back together and walked up to the counter. The old woman behind the counter was giving me a knowing smile. “Don't fall to hard, Deary.” I thought of Donatella's smile. “Thanks for the advice, but your too late.”

200910045
Alien 8392

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War D Puns
War D Puns

Top comment

Don't fall to hard >>> Don't fall too hard.
("To" is a preposition with many other meanings while "too" is an adverb that can also mean "also" or "excessively". It's a common grammatical mistake so just make sure to remember that.)

--but your too late. >>> --but you're too late.
("Your" is a possessive form of 'you', while "you're" is a contraction of 'you are'. It's easier to read 'you're' as 'you are' in your mind so you know which of the two to use.)

Thought I should point them out. As a person who writes as a hobby, I believe that seeing mistakes in my writings is more mortifying than getting corrected. I won't be pointing out the other mistakes I see. Ion mind them. It's just that this is the only dialogue in the chapter n more important in the plot. Also, the MCs are cute. Especially Dona. I just wanna keep the puppy. ><

Maybe Alina can share? :D

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Too Late

Too Late

492 views 34 likes 3 comments


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