The air is heavy and cold and is strikes my face. My throat burns as I’m struggling to keep my breath as I run down the dimly lit street. I can hear my father yelling for me to come back but I can’t. I won’t. At least, not yet. My bare feet ache across the rugged road and I can feel little rocks stabbing my sole and it feels like they’ll start bleeding. 

I look behind me to see if he’s running after me and slow down when I realize he went back inside the house. I slow my pace and I’m walking further down the street heading to my ‘safe spot.’ It was the place I went to when I needed to get out of the house or even just wanted some inspiration for art. It is a beautiful place. At least to me anyway.

It’s a nice, somewhat private sitting area under tree mostly surrounded by bushes. The bushes surround the side of the tree facing the street and the right and left side but don’t cover the back which is where I normally sit. The back of the tree faces a lake which reflects the sky beautifully both day and night. 

There really isn’t much more to it than that but it means so much to me. I would take my sister here many times and we would have picnics and just talk about random things and share secrets. Sometimes when dad would get upset we would escape here together and sometimes mom would join us too. But this place has gotten much more lonely since mom and my sister died.

I reach the place I love so much and sit down staring at the lake in front of me. The lake is very still and calm mirroring the thousands of stars in the sky and bright half moon. The cold winds start pick up causing gentle waves. The wind hits my bare skin and forces me to shiver curling up to keep any in any heat I could. In the spur of the moment, I didn’t think to quickly grab at least some form outer layer. The only thing on my mind was to get out as soon as I could. 

Still curled up, I lean back against the tree with no intention of going back any time soon. I shut my eyes in hopes to fall asleep soon just listening to the water and tree branches move and rustle in the wind. I’m physically and mentally exhausted and I can’t open my eyes. It feels so good to finally just relax by myself. As I feel myself drifting into a sleep I feel a comforting and warm feeling. I feel safe and secure with this warmth and I let everything slip through my mind and fall asleep.

I wake up to sun barely peeking from the horizon. It’s dawn. One of my favorite times of the day. After the cold and dangers of night, the sun always comes back to offer a sense of security.

I stay under the tree watching the sunrise when I suddenly realize what the warmth I was feeling last night was. A blanket. I didn’t bring it. Who would’ve given me a blanket? I didn’t even know people were awake that late at night. Well, I’m not complaining.

I stood up, ready to make my way back home. I figured now while my dad is most likely still asleep would be the best time to go back. I wondered if I should return the blanket but realized I have no idea who it belongs to. Adjusting the blanket to wrap around around my shoulders, a small piece of paper fell from it. I picked it up to read it. 

‘You looked cold so I wanted to help. Also, if you need anything, feel free to contact me! :) p.s. You can keep the blanket’ 

They included their number. Huh? Who would give a stranger their number. Especially someone who was sleeping outside? I decided to brush off these thoughts and head home. Benny was probably hungry and my phone is still at home.

I shoved the piece of paper in my pocket and headed down the road still wrapped in the blanket. I walked back to the house and slowly opened the door making as little noise as possible. I closed the door quietly and walked towards the stairs. I made my way upstairs to my room, not making any noise.

As I was about to close the door to my room Benny came and scratched on my legs for me to pick him up. He was just a puppy and frankly, the only friend I really had. He was a husky with the most beautiful blue eyes I’d ever seen on any living thing. His coat was white and black with mixtures of grey. He was by far the most beautiful dog ever. I picked him up and took him into my room. I plopped on my bed and snuggled with him in the blanket the stranger gave me.

“What do I do, Benny?” I spoke to him as if he’d speak back to me.

“I would really like a friend.” I ranted. “But should I contact them? What if they don’t end up liking me. What if they don’t even want to be my friend but they just feel pity for me because they happened to see me sleeping outside?” 

Benny just stared at me and I giggled at myself for talking to a dog. But those thoughts were still ringing in my mind. Maybe I’ll see them at school on Monday and they’ll introduce them self to me in person. 

I pulled out the piece of paper from my pocket and read the note again. I contemplated whether or not I should text them. What would I even say? 

'Hey! I’m the person who was sleeping outside under the tree and the one you gave the blanket to! What’s up?'

Like that’s the first impression I want. Plus, they’re probably going to be asking questions and I’m not sure if I can handle that. I put the paper in a box to try and forget about it. I needed to be alone right now. I wrapped myself in the blanket and laid down on my bed. Benny came near me and laid next to me as well. I turned on my speaker and softly played some music. I let the music consume my thoughts until all that was on my mind was the song and nothing else.

"There’s nothing left but emptiness

When you realize what you could’ve been

Kept searching for the right moment

When you just have to live in it

You just have to live in it."

That part was so deep and true. I try my hardest not to live in the past. But it does get extremely hard a lot of the time, but I try not to be defined by it.

“Nathan Alexander!” I heard my dad yell from downstairs. 

I get up and walk out of my room to answer him.

“What?” I reply.

“Why didn’t you tell me when you got home!?” He shouted. “Do you know how much f*cking trouble you could’ve caused!? D*mn.”

“Sorry.”

“Sorry? That's all? Whatever, I have to leave for a meeting. I don't know when I'll be back. Don't break anything.” He walks away and heads out of the door.

I go back to my room and sit next to Benny on my bed.

“Don’t worry, Benny. I’ll be able to move out soon and we’re going somewhere far from here.” I say petting him. “Away from this house, from the people, from the school. Away from dad.”