2075

A second date, a week later, took the pair to lunch at the cafe they usually went to. Jaden smirked at the waitress Isaac had the hots for behind her back and Alexander smiled at him. "He still hasn't said anything, has he?" he asked.

"Of course not, but are you surprised?" Jaden replied with a shake of his head.

Alex chuckled. "No, not really. He's a bit of an idiot, but I'm sure he'll get there eventually," he said.

"I think we'll have to force him," Jaden said and sipped of his coffee. "Anyway, how have you been?"

Alex shrugged and fiddled with the bottom of his shirt. "Busy," he said. "I've been working non stop for the last few days. I'm tired."

"You look it."

"Wow, thanks."

Jaden laughed and shook his head. "You know what I mean. You should come over some time, you won't have to use the spare bed anymore," he said. "I swear mine is more comfortable, you might actually get a decent night's sleep for once."

Alexander looked at him with wide eyes. "Oh, I didn't realise we were at that stage alre-"

"Wait, no, that's not what I meant!" Jaden interrupted, his cheeks stained a deep red. Alex held back a laugh. "It's a bit too soon for that. I just meant you can share my bed. If you want to anyway." He ran a hand through his neatly combed hair, messing it up. "I suck at this. I'm sorry."

Ignoring the butterflies in his stomach, Alexander reached out and grabbed the other mans hand. "You're usually so confident too," he said with a smile.

"You make me nervous. I have a bad habit of screwing up what I try to say around you," he muttered, looking down at the table between them.

Was that a good thing or a bad thing? He couldn't figure out the answer. "I'm going to take that as a compliment," he said, trying to ignore the wild thoughts in his mind that threw horrible scenarios at him. He smiled when Jaden laughed and felt the feeling in his stomach subside a little at the sound.

"Well, as you can see, I've been a complete mess," Jaden said, running a hand down his face. "Work is stressing me out for once. You'd think it would be simple since I work from home, but it's just been a mess these last few days. This has actually been a welcome break."

"Glad I could be of service," Alexander replied, a smirk pulling at his lips.

Jaden eyed him and for a second Alex thought that he'd said the wrong thing. He tried to ignore the anxiety welling in his gut. "You're a lot more confident now, you know," Jaden said. There was a look on his face that Alex couldn't read. He went to reply when the waitress placed their food on the table with a forced smile.

Jaden tucked in quickly, but Alex pushed his food around with his fork. "I guess you just helped me be more confident. I mean, you forced me out of my shell. This is just what I'm like," he said in a low voice.

Jaden swallowed his food and looked up at him. "Well, I like it," he replied and tucked back into his food. Alex followed suit and the pair ate in comfortable silence. For a while, Alex's wild thoughts were quiet.

Since their first date he hadn't been able to stop thinking. Jaden still didn't know the truth about him, who he was, his age, and Alex wasn't sure if he was ready to tell. He needed to at some point if they were to be anything more than two men who went on dates, but telling him after so long would ruin everything.

He still had no idea what he was going to do and it had been over a week. He'd ask Isaac or anyone else but then he'd be facing the same issue. Despite everything, spending time with Jaden helped to a degree. The other man's cheerful attitude still made him smile and relax.

He would have to leave it for now, there was nothing else he could do. He wanted a little bit of happiness just for a little while. He'd ruin it himself eventually as he usually did, but it could wait for a bit. He could enjoy himself until he was ready to deal with it, with the anger and the pity that would surely come with the truth.

He did regret not telling anyone the truth when he met them, but at the time he hadn't thought it would be anything more than a little bit of friendship and work relationships. He hadn't wanted to constant pity and the questions. He'd just wanted to seem normal for a year for the first time in a long time. He never expected Jaden.

"Was there anything you wanted to do after this?" Jaden asked when they finished eating.

Alexander smirked at him. "We could try bowling again," he suggested.

"Not happening."

"Why not? I thought you said you were good at it."

"I lied," Jaden said and Alex laughed in response.

"I thought as much," he said. Part of him did want to go bowling again, but there wouldn't be any point if Jaden wasn't going to have any fun. They'd been for a walk in the park on their last date and they'd done too many movie marathons. He wanted to do something a little different, but there wasn't all that much to do in the little town. "I don't know what else we can do then."

Jaden thought for a minute. "There used to be an arcade here years ago, but they got rid of it to put in a damn shopping mall," he said, irritation lacing his voice. Alex was grateful that there wasn't an arcade anymore, it brought back too many memories of his time with Sarah when he was a lot younger.

Alexander shrugged at him. "Do you want to just wander around and see what we can find?" he asked.

"It'll have to do. We've got to do something. They don't like if you stay here too long without ordering anything," Jaden replied. "I'll pay."

"Wait, you don't have to-" His words were cut off by a look from Jaden. "Fine, it's your money." He wasn't going to complain if he didn't have to spend anything. He'd locked most of his money away in a different bank account when he decided to take a break. He'd get it all back when he came back to work.

He was actually dreading returning to work. He found that he enjoyed working on the farm more than he thought. It was tiring work, but it was so different to anything he'd ever done. The people he'd met while he was there made all the difference too.

But he'd have to go back at some point. And going back meant explaining to Jaden who he was. He knew that when he left, he'd be leaving everyone there behind and while he was dreading it, he knew that it was his own fault. Might as well enjoy it while it lasted.

Jaden pulled him from the chair when he finished paying. "Come on then. Stop sitting around," he said.

"It's not like we have somewhere to be," Alex replied but followed him nonetheless. He shivered in the cool breeze and pulled his jacket tighter around him. It was surprisingly chilly for summer but it was better than the sweltering heat that usually plagued them.

The streets around them weren't as busy as he was used to seeing. Even after so long, having personal space when he walked down the street was still strange. He was far too used to the cramped streets of the busy cities.

Jaden grabbed his hand as they walked and Alex smiled at the ground. It was only their second date and already Alex was wondering what it was they were doing. What would he call Jaden if someone asked? His boyfriend? Friend? He had no idea. It was too early to tell and relationships were always weird when you didn't know if you were soulmates.

He wasn't going to check if they were. He knew already that they weren't. Jaden was far too good for him to be his soulmate. Jaden's soulmate would be someone who wasn't a depressed mess and wouldn't be hard to look after like he was. It wouldn't be him. He didn't even need to use and AgeFinder to know. There was no way he'd be that lucky to find them now.

The universe was going to make him wait as long as it possibly could to give him happiness. He closed his eyes and shook his head. He was on a date, he didn't need to be thinking about soulmates and waiting and everything that brought him sadness.

"Are you alright?" Jaden asked, his voice laced with worry. He pulled them to a stop in the middle of the street and stared at him with wide eyes.

Alex nodded at him. "Yeah, I'm fine. I just zoned out for a second there. You weren't saying something, were you?" he asked.

Jaden laughed at him. "No. I was just worried you were getting lost in your thoughts again," he said, rubbing his thumb over the back of his hand. "You do that a lot, you know."

"Yeah, I know. I'm okay though, promise." A lie, but Jaden didn't have to know. He'd have to explain everything if he even so much as tried to tell him.

He'd be able to deal with it. He'd tell Jaden the truth about him eventually, probably before he left if he had any choice in the matter. For now, he'd accept the tiny amount of happiness the other man brought him. He didn't need to worry about what he'd do after. He still had a few more months before he had to leave. It would be enough.