The midterms soon came, and it was the perfect distraction.

Daniel could shut himself off from the world without the world questioning him. Not that he would have answers to give anyone. So he kept his headphones on and studied even when he didn’t need to anymore.

It was too soon for him to truly know how he was feeling, but he knew there was something. That sparkling feeling of happiness. The way he’d sometimes catch himself smiling for no reason, catch himself looking at Étienne. The way his thoughts would go blank whenever their eyes would meet.

Étienne’s blushing cheeks; his constant smile. His eyes of some color he could not yet entirely define. Palish blue-green with a hint of goldish brown when you got close enough. Plain hazelnut from afar. A hint of curiosity mingling with his features. His eyelashes.

Daniel got to notice that whenever his roommate smiled his eyes almost closed, his nose would slightly rumple. That when Étienne smiled at you it was like you were the only person in the room. The background would disappear, no one else mattered but you. You just felt… special. Like you meant something. But he didn’t want to mean anything to him. He did but didn’t. Dreamed he did but woke up feeling the opposite. Dreamed he fell in love with some girl but woke up wanting something else.

The only problem was that Daniel cared too much about Étienne to truly wish to drive him away. So he still studied with his roommate, still shared music with him. Red Hot Chili Peppers, Genesis, Nirvana... Anything to keep his mind off reality.

***

It was one of these days. Listening to music together, studying in silence. And everything felt right just as every time they were together. Whenever Étienne left Daniel would start thinking, but when he was there he’d forget everything and his mind would go blank.

Étienne’s eyes were glimmering like they always did whenever he had an idea. He was looking at Daniel, waiting for him to notice him so that he wouldn’t startle him. Whenever someone got him out of his little “computer and music” bubble, he’d jump.

It took about five minutes for Daniel to notice that he was being stared at. He chuckled, something he hadn’t genuinely done since he was ten years old. “Do you need my help for something?”.

The younger one nodded vigorously, his curls getting all tangled up from the action. He had found light strings and needed help hanging it up. Over his first month, Étienne had accumulated quite a lot of pictures and he was sick of the plain yellow walls.

The lights were soon set up, and hanging around them were now dozens of pictures of snow, trees and even their school. Every week Étienne would add some more and eventually Daniel started putting up posters of his own. The room started to take shape, to expand into a little universe where both roommates felt like they belonged.

Together with their heads inside-out, together with their hearts beating to their own shared music.