I followed Kei to the train station silently. I wanted to apologize about the night before but the fact that we would be home alone for the following few days made the hair on my back stand. We got into the train, and like every morning it was packed. Kei took my wrist and guided me to the corner, he stood in front of me shielding me from the waves of people getting in and out of the train.
We were too close to each other, our bodies were touching in many places. I almost burnt a hole in Kei's chest because I couldn't move my eyes up to his face. His cologne was mixed with the smell of his shampoo. It was euphoric.
Suddenly, Kei was pushed against me and this time our bodies were glued together. My breath hitched and my face turned scarlet. I could hardly breathe. I slowly looked up only to find Kei looking straight ahead not bothered or even aware of my agitation.
We finally got out of the train and I could finally breathe. We walked to the school, still not talking. That was how the whole morning went; Kei ignoring and not talking to me, and I debating what to say but not able to utter a word. It was very frustrating.
At lunch, a boy from another class brought Daisuke and Kei some sandwiches and the three of them sat together to eat.
"Can I join you for lunch?" I tore my eyes from the back of Kei and looked at Yoko. She had the sweetest smile on her face.
"Of course." I smiled back at her and almost gave her a hug, she was saving me from the embarrassment of eating alone. I had been having lunch with Kei for a while now. It was strange not eating with him.
Yoko and I immediately sat in silence. I took a bite of the sandwich I had but I couldn't eat much. Anger started forming inside of me. 'Why the hell should I be the one to apologize? He didn't even ask me if I was ok with-'
"It is really peaceful today because Minako is not here." Yoko interrupted the trail of my thought.
"Oh yeah, I agree." As I looked around the class for Minako, Kei's phone rang and my eyes jolted back to him. His back was still to me but I could tell his whole body stiffened when he heard the voice on the other end. He whispered something in Daisuke's ear, and they both ran out of the classroom. I didn't even have time to call Kei's name.
As soon as the last class's bell rang, I picked up my phone and called Kei. Of course, he didn't answer. I was freaking out big time. 'What had happened that had him and Daisuke rushing like that?' I called again but no answer. 'damn it' I picked up his schoolbag and, for the first time, went home alone.
I was pretty mad and worried when I got home. Part of me was praying to find Kei at home. But he wasn't which made my anxiety increase. I called him again and then debated whether I should call Amanda or Mr. Kenji.
"I should wait." I crashed on the couch. 'I just hope he's ok.'
I opened my eyes to the sound of my cellphone. 'Did I fall asleep?' I looked at the wall clock, it was eight o'clock. My eyes widened. I had slept for almost three hours. I picked up my phone to find two missed calls from my mom and one text message from an unknown number. I opened the text and froze. For a good five minutes I was just staring at the screen pushing a button every time the light turned off on it. I didn't blink, I think I didn't even breathe. 'I should have known.'
I finally came to. My teeth were so clenched together, my jaw hurt. My heart also hurt. It was an excruciating pain. I knew it was Minako who sent the message. The bitch wanted to die. I looked at her arms around Kei one last time before throwing the phone against the wall. Unfortunately, the image was already carved in my head. The way Kei's head was thrown back with his eyes closed. Minako's smile splitting her face in two. Their cheeks touching. Her arm squeezing him. Lord, I was boiling and ready to kill someone. I had never been that angry before. I was also so hurt, it felt like a knife was being twisted in my chest.
A warm tear escaped my left eye, but I quickly and violently wiped it. I stood and marched to where I had thrown my phone. It wasn't broken except for the crack that ran through the whole screen. I dialed Kei's number. It rang again without an answer. I pounded the end button and redialed. At the fifth ring, a voice shot from the other side.
"Hello?" The female voice answered in English. I could tell it was Minako. I squeezed my phone.
"Is Kei there?" I said through my teeth.
"Well... he is, but he's a little busy taking a shower right now." I tightened my grip on my phone, if that was even possible. I was silent for a while.
"Tell him to call me when he's out." I quickly hung up not giving her the chance to utter another syllable.
I waited for Kei's phone call for the next hour and a half. With every second that passed, my mind used the cruelest tortures on me; it made me imagine every possible thing Kei and Minako were doing together which all included some body contact of some sort. I ran my hands through my hair and pushed to my feet. I took my phone and walked upstairs to my room. Locking the door behind me, I collapsed on my bed. Another tear slowly made its way down my cheek. I let it, and all the other ones that followed. With my phone still in my hand, I cried myself to sleep.
I was awaken in the middle of the night by a loud thud on my door. I sat up and looked at my phone, it was three forty five.
"Sam." Kei's drunk voice called from the other side of the door. I didn't answer. He tried to turn the doorknob, but thankfully I had locked my room. "Sam!" His voice came again, a little louder.
"Go away Kei." I screamed in the darkness.
"Why? Come on, open the door. I want to see you."
"Why? Really? Why?" I let out an angry sigh. "I don't want to see you! Go away." I screamed again.
"Fine, you don't have to be so rude." I heard him walk to his room and I fell on my pillow again. I stared at the dark ceiling until dawn.
My body was so tired but my brain was restless. I got up to get ready for school because it was already six. I walked to the bathroom and stared at the ghost reflecting on the mirror in front of me. I had dark circles under my eyes. I looked like a drug addict. I took a quick shower and wore my school uniform before putting my hair up in a bun. I didn't even care to dry it. I lifted my bag and my phone, and left the house. It was the earliest I had left for school ever, but I didn't want to see Kei.
At school, Yoko was the first student to show up.
"Oh my God, Sam. You look awful." She almost screamed as soon as she laid eyes on me.
"Well, thanks." I said sarcastically.
"Are you alright?" She asked dismissing my sarcasm. I go silent for a moment.
"I don't know." I breathed.
"What do you mean?" A worried look traversed her face. I opened my mouth to answer, but a group of students walked in. "Come let's take a walk." She pulled me from my seat and guided me to the yard. We sat on one of the benches and I told her about the picture and phone call. She was really shocked.
I fought my tears throughout the whole conversation but when Yoko leaned in and hugged me, my emotions got the best of me and I let myself go, crying on her shoulder for a while. After I had calmed down, I pushed myself away from her embrace.
"I'm sorry." Was all I could say.
"What are you talking about? We are friends." She simply said while wearing a gentle smile. I hugged her again and then we walked to the bathroom where I washed my face before going to our classroom. It was almost time for class but Kei hadn't arrived yet, and neither had Minako.
They didn't make it to second or third period. Yoko kept on turning to look at me occasionally and I met her with a weak smile every time.
At lunch, Kei finally showed up. He walked into the classroom and our eyes met. He glared at me and a shiver went down my back. I averted my eyes and took a second bite of my dull sandwich trying to smile at Yoko but I am sure it was more of a grimace than a smile.
"Samantha." Kei called with an angry voice that made me flinch. Everyone in class turned to look at Kei, and then turned to me. I froze for a few seconds.
"I really don't feel like doing PE today." I told Yoko while pretending to look at my cell phone. I was trying so hard to control my voice. She gave me a confused look and nodded hesitantly.
The next thing I knew was a hand squeezing my right wrist and pulling me to my feet.
"Come with me." Kei ordered in English through his clenched teeth.
"Let go of me." I struggled. But his grip was unbreakable. "Kei, let go." I shouted again but he didn't bother to stop pulling me to God knew where. He dragged me all the way to the back of the school where the trash incinerator was. When he let go of my wrist, it was throbbing with pain.
"What the hell Sam?" He screamed. I stared at him without uttering a word. I wanted to hear what he had to say. "How come you didn't wake me this morning?" 'Is he serious?'
"Is it my job now... to wake you up?" I scoffed.
"What's with the attitude?" He took two steps and was right in front of me. I found the courage in me to glare at him.
"Maybe you should ask yourself." I said and looked away. He grabbed my right arm and shook me.
"What is that supposed to mean?" I scrunched in pain.
"You're hurting me." Kei released my arm immediately and ran his hand through his hair.
"Why are you so angry? Is it because of what happened on Monday night?" I took a deep breath trying to calm myself.
"No Kei. You were the one who gave me attitude because of what happened on Monday night." My voice came out really low and menacing.
"Then what is it?"He sounded impatient.
"So, I take it you don't think you've done anything wrong, right?" I was still speaking really low. Kei ran his hand through his hair again but this time, he looked up to the sky.
"No."
"Then, where were you last night?" His body stiffened and he was quiet for a while.
"I was taking care of some business."
"What kind of business?" I was the one being impatient this time.
"Something that doesn't really concern you, Samantha."
"Oh really?" I opened my cell phone and searched for the message I had gotten the night before. Then, I slammed the phone on Kei's chest. "So this doesn't concern me, huh?" My voice was loud.
Kei looked at the screen and his eyes grew surprised, then furious. He shut the phone and squeezed it so hard his knuckles went white. He looked at me in the eyes, My blue to his dark lenses holding each other for a minute or two. Our staring contest was stopped by Kei clearing his throat.
"I'm sorry." Was what he said. His words broke me. I clenched my fists digging my nails deep in my palms.
"I'm sorry." I repeated in a mumble. My body was shaking with rage. "So let me get this straight. You wanted to sleep with me on Monday, but because I wasn't ready, you went to Minako on Tuesday... So much for a relationship."
"What?" Kei asked with a puzzled look.
"Do I look like a freaking machine to you?" I yelled. "You ignored me all day yesterday. I tried to apologize but you left without even looking at me."
"There was an emergency-"
"Why the hell should I apologize?" I was talking to myself not hearing what Kei was saying. I scowled at him. "You bastard. You cheated on me." I screamed. My tears betraying me again. Kei took a step toward me and I took two steps back. "How could you?"
"Sam, I can explain-" He took another step closer.
"Stay away from me." I cried. "Don't you dare come closer to me." 'Explain what? He already said sorry expecting me to forgive him. Why? Because I love him?'
"Sam, it's not what you think, please-"
"I don't want to hear it... I was a fool, a fool to fall in love with you, a fool to follow you here, a fool to trust you." I felt like dying at that moment.
"Sam-"
"Just leave Kei, leave me alone." He opened his mouth to say something but closed it again. He turned on his heels and walked away. As I watched his back getting farther and farther away, my tears blurred my vision and I collapsed to the ground.
'Was it just a game to him? Did he even have feelings for me, or did he just say that to play me?' My mind was racing with so many questions with no answers. All I knew was that my heart was in pieces and that I needed to cry. My whole body was shaking as I howled in the back of the school. I didn't care if somebody saw or heard me. I just needed to let everything out.
After I had calmed down, I pushed to my feet weakly and wobbled to the nearest bathroom. I washed my face and looked at my eyes. They were really red and puffy. I had to walk across the whole school to get to class. Everyone had already started their fifth period. 'Crap, I have Mr Matsumoto.' I cursed remembering my cold hearted English teacher. He particularly hated me because I had corrected a mistake or two he had made. I considered skipping class but then if I did, he would remember that and hold it against me forever.
I finally made it to the classroom and knocked before sliding the door open. My eyes immediately fell on the old and cranky Mr Matsumoto.
"Well, look who has finally decided to join us." He said with disdain.
"I'm really sorry sir but-" I began but I was stopped by the hand he held up.
"I can't let this slide Miss Martin, so you come see me in the office after school." He shooed me away with his hand and resumed his lesson. I walked to my seat, ignoring Kei's eyes which were following me, and sat.
I was sure that Mr Matsumoto was going to give me some unbelievable task to do as punishment. I sighed. My day couldn't get any worse. Or so I thought.
Comments (0)
See all