Here is a fun fact about me, I don't really know how to swim. No one ever taught me. In fact big bodies of water kind of scare me. It all goes back to when I was young my brothers used to bully me as brothers do. We had this pool in our backyard, wasn't that deep only about four feet. We had only just bought it, I was about 8. My older brother was 12. My younger brother 7. They would always horse around and try to get me involved. I never really connected with my brothers, for two reasons, one, they are boys they didn't have that much in common with me. Two, I was sort of shy and clingy when I was young, very fragile, and they often picked on me for it.

Well, one day our parents left us alone to go buy groceries we were going to grill outside and have a day of it. My brother was in charge of watching us. Anyways, I was 8 and still needed those arm floaty things, even my younger brother knew how to swim. It was just that every time my parents would go to the public pool I would get shy and never go in the water so they never taught me how to swim. My brothers always picked on me for it.

So while they were gone my brothers started horsing around in the pool and I was just clinging to the side and floating there. They took their opportunity to gang up on me when my parents weren't home. They grabbed me took my floaties off and told me to swim. They called me a liar and said I was only pretending. Then my older brother threw me into the middle of the pool.

It doesn't take a genius to figure out what happened next.

I flailed around helplessly and started drowning.

My brothers thought I was faking so they laughed at me.

Well, I sank to the bottom like a rock. Lucky for me my parents came back just in time. My dad saw what was happening and sprang into action. He jumped into the pool with his clothes and shoes still on and pulled me out.

I was pretty much dead already.

Okay maybe that was dramatic but it's true I was all filled up with water and couldn't breathe. He had to do mouth to mouth and help me out. Then my parents drove me to the hospital just to make sure I wouldn't dry drown.

My brothers got in so much trouble.

After that two things happened, one I never trusted my brothers ever again. Two I became deathly afraid of water and never learned how to swim. I steered clear of any large body of water.

But tripping and not being in my right state of mind I had forgotten all about that fear until then. Falling into the water brought that fear back front and center. My heart raced and suddenly my trip took a turn for the worse.

The things I was seeing became scary, my heart raced. I could hear things that weren't there. Like my brothers laughing at me and calling me a faker. Memories I didn't want to remember came to my head.

I shut my eyes tight and clung to the dock for dear life.

"Come on Solo, come swim with me!" Riff called.

I quickly tried to climb out of the water but Riff swam over to me and pulled me back in, wrapping her arms around me.

"Let me go!" I cried out in fear.

"Whoa, what's up?"

I was flailing around and reaching for the dock. She let me go and I clung to it. Voices taunted me calling me a loser and faker all sorts of horrible things they said. They talked about how I was going to die and drown and no one would save me.

"God, stop, stop!" I cried out.

"Solo?" Riff put her hand on my shoulder.

I quickly tried to climb out but the trip messes with my perception and I grabbed nothing instead of the dock, this caused me to slip into the water. I sank down down down. I kicked and I flailed, I swallowed water down. Riff quickly pulled me up and I clung to her.

"Get me out!" I cried.

"Shh, shh, I got you, it's okay." She held me.

"I can't swim." I cried into her shoulder, closing my eyes tight so I didn't have to look at the black water trying to swallow me whole.

"Okay, it's okay. Calm down or you'll have a bad trip. Just calm down. I got you." she assured me.

I took several staggered breaths and coughed out the water I swallowed.

She tried to push me off but I dug my nails into her skin.

"No!" I cried.

"Shh, it's okay, I won't let go." She assured me.

She pulled me off of her but held me up so I wouldn't sink.

I kicked my legs in panic.

"Whoa, calm down. Just stop moving." She instructed.

I forced myself still.

"Okay, look swimming isn't even that hard. I can show you."

"No! don't let go."

"I won't. Just listen." She moved closer to me.

"First thing is first, remain calm. Relax your body. Let your natural buoyancy take over and float. You also want to kick your legs back and forth, short strides at an average pace Not fast. This is called treading water. Kick at the knees, back and forth." She instructed.

I did as she told me forcing my body to hold still before kicking my legs.

"Okay good, then you want to use your arms to push the water around you, like this." She used her free arm to move in a half-circle. "This will help push you in whatever direction you want to go in now you try." She said.

I moved my arms around like her.

Then she let go.

I panicked.

I moved around like she taught me in quick succession and ended up swimming right into her and clinging to her.

She laughed.

"You did it, you swam to me."

"You, you let go." I buried my head into her.

"Sometimes we have to let go, or else how will we move forward?" she said.

I just held her.

"Here cling to my back. I'll take you swimming with me. Show you what you are missing out on." She said.

"No." I whimpered.

"It will be okay, I got you."

I let out a shaky breath and got on her back.

My hallucinations had calmed down but I could tell I wasn't out of the woods just yet. I felt super paranoid and I swear there were things lurking in the corner of my, just out of my direct line of sight and when I would look they were gone.

Riff swam forward and I clung tighter her and my breathing increased.

"Wee! See, not so bad." She said.

"Riff I want to get out." I whimpered.

"Live with me for a moment. Let yourself feel the fear, face it, and let it go." She said.

"I can't." I cried.

She swam farther out into the lake.

"Riff!"

"Look if you want to go back you can but I'm staying out here." She said.

I glared at her, not that she could see.

Soon we were far out and the dock was so far I had to squint to see it. I clung to her and she let me.

"It's amazing, being out here like this. Free as the day I was born. Just naked in the water no one here to tell me what to do or make me get out. When was the last time you felt this free?" she asked me to get my mind off my fear.

"I-I don't know." I stammered.

"Here we go with those I don't knows. Half of your answers are I don't knows." She points out.

"Well, I don't." I pout.

"I think you do, you just don't want to think long enough to find out that you do."

"I want to get out," I said again.

She sighed.

"Come here." She shrugged me off her back.

I grabbed her hands and she pulled me to her front. I clung to her arms.

"Float on your back." She instructed.

I shook my head no.

She sighed again.

"Then I guess you will just have to dance with me." she gave me a devious smirk.

Then this crazy girl started twirling me around in the water pulling me like a ragdoll. I clung to her for dear life and kicked my legs fast trying to stay above water. Then she pulled me close to her body, our chest pressed firmly into each other.

"Look at me and only me," she instructed.

So I did.

"Think about earlier and what kissing me made you feel. Not this."

"I can't."

"Then maybe I should remind you." with that she kissed me.

Instantly to mood changed. I sighed into her as I felt the pressure of paranoia slowly being lifted off of me.

We kissed and we kissed, and we kissed some more.

Soon I was treading water effortlessly. Doing it without even realizing I was doing it. Her hands felt up my naked body and I let mine feel hers. I have never felt another person's body before her. Not even once. It was a whole new experience for me.

It was one thing to feel my own body but another to let someone else feel it.

I let my hands move along the natural curves of her body. Down the small of her back to the round cheeks of her butt. Under the round cheeks of her butt to her firm boney hips. Down her hips to her thighs. Then up to her stomach to her breast.

I felt every curve on her body, well almost every curve.

I didn't even realize they I wasn't holding on to her and she wasn't holding me up. Her hands if anything were pushing me away. They pushed roughly against me, squeezing me in places. Her lips found my neck and her hand squeezed my butt tightly pulling the cheeks apart.

"Uhh." I moaned.

Again the sound startled me because I don't ever make sounds like those.

She pulled back slowly before showing me both of her hands.

"See you're doing it." she pointed out.

I laughed nervously and paddled in place.

"Come on." She swam back a little and enticed me to follow her.

So I pushed forward with my body and used my arms to propel me in her direction. She giggled as I sloppily swam towards her.

"You almost got it, come on." She swam farther back.

I pushed forward even more. Every time I was about to reach her she would swim father back. She did this until we were back by the dock. Finally, I reached her and clung to her.

"I got you," she whispered against my lips.

I kissed her.

She giggled and pulled back.

"Come on, let's go find ourselves a room with some privacy." She wiggled her eyebrows.

I nodded. She got out of the water then helped me out.

We balled up our clothes in hands and walked naked to the cabin in the distance. I kept glancing around and taking in the scenery, my trip made everything look more intense. The shadows were darker, the shapes sharper. It was all just so weird.

"You okay now?" she asked me.

I nodded.

"Good." She smiled.

I smiled back at her. Who would have thought all needed was a hot girl to motivate me; I could have learned how to swim a long time ago. Go figure.