He opened his eyes to a new day, in the open outdoors of his world.
Another day has arrived, another day to breathe and walk across the world one more time.
He sighed, slowly picking up himself and getting ready to roam once again.
His pace has slowed down with time, now he no longer rushes leaving, the hope of escaping that lingered within him long ago, has been fading alongside the cool breezes that swayed his body right and left with each passing day.
He looked up at the perfectly bright blue sky, at the fluffy perfect-looking clouds, down at the perfectly green grass that touched his feet, his ear listened to the birds chirping at the morning sun, the dancing of the wind rustling through the trees.
He walked through the long land of grass and reached the sea, so pure, so calm that it reflected a perfect image of the floating clouds.
He took a step in, rippling the clear reflection, and letting himself float, facing the sky with birds passing above him ever in an ideal v pattern.
It's been such a long time, he lost any sense of time. He no longer knows how old he was, he no longer cared how many days have passed, he stopped counting. Specks of hope are suddenly present from time to other.
A time where he thinks about him. That his friend will come one day, and save him from this neverending idealistic world. The world that his soul now resins in; breathed all the life in many different shapes and colors, an embodied fabrication of his imagination and his deepest secrets. The world that became his prison after he wandered it for an exit. But it was not possible for him to leave, it never was.
He dived in the blue salty water to see the large swimming whales, singing songs of love and belonging. He swam along with them, hearing their words go inside his mind and speak to him in ways he only understands.
Time passed and the whales swam away, fading into the day blue like ghosts. He pushed through the water and he surfaced, looking at the sun that was now right above him.
He left the sea behind and walked through the open land of grass once more. The world around him grew some of his favorite flowers, the lilies. On each side, they appear as he walks from time to time. Or when someone else is with him.
"Good morning!" her soft, cheerful voice spoke to him.
"Morning Operator," he replied, eyes fixed on the stretched land.
"Aw... that's not the Good Morning I hoped for!" she huffed as she crossed her legs.
He looked at her, his eyes attracted to the glowing lights coming from her flying hovercraft. They made little noises as he looked up to see her spotless, porcelain face change from pouty to a delighted one with a pretty smile.
"Sorry..." he took a deep breath gathering the little heartiness left within him and burst them out as a "Morning Operator!"
She giggled and asked ever so full of life, like her usual self. "How are you feeling today?"
He started walking again and she followed "Alright." he replied.
"That's great news for today!" she clapped her hands together, childishly giggling.
"You're in an extra good mood." he chuckled.
"I just feel that today is going to be another beautiful day!"
"How so?" he looked back at her.
"You went swimming today, So you must be in a good mood! I'm sorry I couldn't make it earlier so I could join you." her personality appealed to him in times like these, it made him feel at ease that at least a presence is being merry in these bland times.
"It's fine, you didn't miss much," he replied almost monotonically.
"Did you have any luck today?" her question rubbed him the wrong way, even with her calming tone, it was almost unusual for him to feel this way now. But sometimes he wishes he wasn't reminded of the true nature of this place.
He looked away to the deep forest on his side and spoke in a calm manner "You know the answer to that more than anything, why do you still ask?"
"I'm sorry if I've caused any stress, I was thinking maybe you found a way that I'm not aware of, that's why I'm asking." she fiddled with her fingers looking down at his black hair from above.
"Don't worry about it, if I ever found a way out, I'll tell you." he kept on walking, leaving her behind.
There is no way out, he was almost sure. He hated the thought of giving up to his deepest fears. His lingering anxieties and worries that are slowly taking over with each moment this invading thought lurked through his mind.
He must not keep it for long, he can't keep it for long, or else, the world around him will also feed on them and then it will switch to a version he no longer bares to witness.
"Agnes?" he turns around looking for the delightful floating girl. But he cannot spot her.
"Yes, Zachary?" she appeared in front of him, almost taking him by surprise.
"Are you staying for a bit longer?"
"If you want me to," she replied with a warming smile, and he smiled back at her.
Zachary took a long walk with the flying colorful girl, they walked for a long time with the green grass fields turning into a golden shade as the sun set, painting the world in reds, oranges pinks.
They watched the burning orange disk as it slid beneath the horizon. The sea mirrored its image with a crystal clear view, no matter how much the wind blew, the sea barely moved with it, however, it sometimes slightly waved with the wind, following some semblance of nature.
But the wind never blew hard enough, to begin with, so the waves would dance with it. It barely rains and the grass is never brown, seasons come and go like will and happiness.
He got up again, moving his legs to roam the vast landscapes once more. The operator didn't follow him, she went the opposite direction and faded into thin air.
---
He opened his eyes to a world painted in fiery colors. the trees tinted in shades of Autumn. The orange leaves blew with the wind one after another in grace. He stood still, letting it pass by his side carrying the leaves with it, he continued to walk on a stone path leading further within the forest of Autumn, he could hear the gentle breaking of leaves beneath his footsteps.
The faint sound of laughter emerged from the distant, he hesitated, to either continue or turn back and leave this part of himself. But he marched on regardless, wanting to feel the warmth of his voice once more.
He stopped in front of a nostalgic playground, adorned with wilted leaves. The laughter grew louder and louder as two children ran after each other and around the slide, their fading memory jumping from place to place. One minute you see them playing tag, another you see them playing on the swings, going back and forth, trying to touch with their tiny hands as they each move at opposite directions.
Happy faces he thought, he approached the illusion of the two little friends, with each minute he watched them, he felt the sense of warmth, a slight tingling sensation in his chest. He placed a hand on where his beating heart sat, he can't correct this feeling with the touch of his hand, but it was almost instinct as if his hand has stopped his heart from tipping and falling over.
When he felt his chest becoming too tight for him to hold back his tears, he turned away, shutting his eyes tight, giving his back to the blue memories. Then slowly, the wind grew louder and stronger and lifted the leaves off the ground and trees, and carried their memories far away along with the world of Autumn.
---
Suddenly small spots on his cheeks and nose felt cold, he opened his eyes to see white snowflakes falling on his face and body, he glanced around to see the world covered in tender, beautiful snow.
His feet dug deep inside it with each step he took, he kept on moving, though it was difficult to do so. The more he walked, the harder it got.
More crystal snowflakes started falling, they confined his vision and he can barely see in front of him. Zachary wasn't sure if he was sinking in the chilly white or if he was getting tired. It was probably both, he thought. His body was starting to feel cold.
He walked and walked and walked, through the dead trees and the snowing land, it never seemed to end.
His legs finally gave out and he fell on his knees, a sense of exhaustion took over him. He was worn out.
But his ears caught an interesting sound, a sound that made him confused, for it didn't belong to him.
The sound of footsteps crushing the snow beneath their weight. He felt a presence near him, whoever walked by, they were near.
Zachary raised his head slowly hoping to catch a glimpse of the unknown presence.
But what he saw was a familiar profile, one that was a bit hazy with all the blinding fog.
"Marshall?..." He exhaled. pushing himself to get up, he wobbled around before he managed to balance himself.
"Marshall!" it was him, that's what his brain pieced together in high hopes. For a moment, he forgot about everything. The winter, the operator, the world, all of it gone with one glimpse.
But the ease sadly didn't last more than a few seconds, as Marshall turned his heel and started disappearing further into the fog, slowly fading within the winter.
"Wait!" He ran in shaky, unbalanced steps, the cold took over his body, every step he took sent pain and numbness across his whole body. He breathed frantically, chasing the shadows while calling out his name.
He kept on running, but he could never reach him.
He was gone.
Zachary was desperate, looking in all directions then tripped on his own feet and sunk deep into the snow.
Chillness surrounded him from all directions, it gave him a moment to think, how could he not hear him? He was shouting at the top of his lungs.
The answer was clear and he hated it, he was another illusion of the Winter.
He has become the center of the storm inside of him, unable to get himself out of the predicament, he cursed beneath his breath.
He is never going to come. He is going to stay here forever. He'll never be able to leave, doomed to roam this realm forever and ever, fighting back his own self.
He couldn't hold himself back any longer, his eyes welled up in tears, breathing heavily, closing his eyes once more, and slowly letting his consciousness slip into darkness.
---
The sound of birds chirping and many footsteps surrounded his ears, he snapped out of the darkness only to see green grass, warm sunlight and many rustling trees with people walking all in the same direction. Zack hurried on his feet and watched the world of Summer around him, phantoms of young adults passed him, right and left, with books and notes. Only a few minutes passed before he flinched to the sound of his own voice, he turned around to see a phantom of himself, speaking to the other guy.
"Did you remember to do your assignment this time?"
"We had an assignment?" the other man asked sheepishly
"Please tell me you're not serious." he almost cried in agony from how many times he needed to remind him.
The other man laughed and said "of course I'm not, here.' he waved a file with research papers in it.
"Thank God, I ain't covering for you again." he rolled his eyes,
"You're the best man." Marshall wrapped his arm around his friend's neck as they both headed into the thick trees of Summer.
"The phantoms..." he whispered to himself.
"I need to stop this." He said shakingly. "This is making my head spin." he stormed away only to be stopped by another presence.
"Zachary!" His voice pierced through his heart. The presence waved at him, smiling. A younger picture of Marshall.
His brain was in a blend of nostalgia, happiness, and confusion, the phantom was waving at him, to him.
"Mar-" before he could call his name, his voice spoke, "hey bro." Then a younger version of himself went right through him, robbing any small pleasure he felt from the thought of being seen.
He clenched his heart, it felt as if the breath was knocked out of him. He tried to breathe slowly only to witness a copy of himself smiling with his non-present friend.
"Go away already! Why are you torturing me?!" His eyes widen at his own words, he was shouting at thin air, no one was here but him, no one was real but him. He was the only one here.
"I've been waiting for so long... I don't even know how much time has passed..." his voice cracked as spoke to himself.
---
The green of Summer then slowly shifted into the sweet fragrant presence of Spring, flowers slowly bloomed on the threes, in the bushes and emerged between the grass.
"Hey, I dunno how I'm gonna ask this buuuuuut-"
His voice ringed in his ear again, he didn't dare to turn around as he knew what would happen next. Zachary's mouth silently reminisced the words they spoke.
"I'm working as a private detective now, and I was wondering..."
"You want me to work with you?" the other Zachary almost dropped his cup of coffee.
"Yeah, every detective needs an assistant, right?"
"I..."
"I mean, you don't have to if you don't want to."
Zachary stopped, he couldn't say the same thing again. He couldn't.
"No no! That's not what I meant, I don't mind at all!"
"Great! Let's go then, show you the office. I'm sure you'll like it."
The phantoms turned around and turned to dust floating with the wind.
"I...I don't." his fists clenched. "He didn't do anything wrong."
The world around him shifted to a small office, he didn't move an inch, he covered his eyes. "Please stop."
"You actually afforded this..." his voice spoke.
"I'm paying installments each month, by next year this office will be officially mine!" he spoke cheerfully, "Ours I mean."
"I didn't agree yet, by the way." his voice spoke.
"Stop it," he muttered. A cracking sound echoed.
"Yes, you did."
"I said I don't mind, but I didn't say yes"
"That's the same thing, man!"
"I know, I'm just messing with you." his voice laughed.
"Stop! Stop this!" another furious cracking sound echoed.
"I don't want to remember this!" More cracking crept up the office and it was soon engulfed in cracks that connected in a frantic movement. The more he refused to face them, the stronger the cracks became.
"JUST END THIS ALREADY!" the world around him shattered and darkness swallowed him whole.
He fell hard on his back, but he was not injured, yet waves of pain went through his body, the space around him felt cold and the sound of heavy rain filled his head.
He opened his eyes to face nothing but stretched emptiness in front of him, pouring down chilling water that stung his face and body.
"I..."
"I don't...."
"I don't blame him... I don't."
---
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