Kawashita snorted and rubbed his neck. “I’ve made a skeptic out of you.”

“It’s not that.” I reached out for him and stopped midway, sighing. “Okay, maybe a little. I can’t help it after what you’ve said.”

“This is going to be hard if you don’t believe me.” He clicked his tongue, frowning and scratching his head. He glanced at me. “Can I hold your hand in public?”

“Right now?” My hand flew to my chest. I glanced around, and there wasn’t a lot of people.

He nodded. “If you don’t mind and in the future as well.”

“You know you’re so good at talking.” I held out my left hand to him. “Have you considered changing your major?”

His hands were cold when it gripped mine. He rubbed my palm between his before he stepped closer. “I’m only good at talking now because if I don’t do anything, you’re going to slip away, and I’m not going to let that happen. Not after tasting and having you.”

“See.” I cocked my head, biting my lips to stop myself from being embarrassed.

“I’m serious though.” Kawashita’s voice dropped. “It’s my fault that you’re doubting, but please believe me. I mean what I said. I’m not seeing anyone else other than you. I don’t have sex friends. I’m not going to need anyone else.”

“As long as I fulfill it within your conditions,” I said and looked away.

His grip tightened but I didn’t look at him. I added, “I know. I am still testy since from before.” I sighed. “And you’re right. This is not going to be easy if I doubt you. I’m sorry.”

The warning announcement boomed over followed by the rattling of the train. I glanced at him and squeezed his hand as the doors opened. “So, Kawashita-kun, I’m going to believe you. I will trust our contract and put my faith in you. I’ll stop asking for unwanted and unnecessary questions.”

We got on the train and sat together with our hands still linked. He just looked at me, his expression pensive.

“Will you be okay?” he asked when the train moved. “You had four and a half beers.”

On reflex, annoyed, I made a face but remembered I had been asking him imposing questions. But he already saw my reaction. He tapped my hand. “It’s just you got drunk easily the last time I saw you.”

“That was an act,” I replied without thinking. “It was to avoid you. I was lightheaded but not drunk when we went to the motel.”

“Oh.” His cheeks reddened but it quickly faded as he apologized for intruding.

“No. It was on reflex,” I said without elaborating. His question reminded me of my ex who disapproved of my drinking habits.

We sat together in silence but in a shorter time than I expected. He got off at the next station, letting my hand go and bidding me goodbye. I contemplated and reflected on the rest of the way. Uncomplicated seemed harder than the way people sold it. At least it was a good distraction for what’s waiting for me at the end of this train ride.