They finally arrived in the town again and stopped the carriage behind the inn where they were staying. Hou Dong pushed the canvas back and jumped down, turning back to take Kanuen’s hand and pulled him down. "We’re back." He smiled and pulled Kanuen into his arms, holding him as if he could make sure that he was back this way.
Ah, even though he hadn’t shown it in front of Kanuen, he had been worried that something might happen. Well, it was good that everything had gone well in the end. "Let’s go in then. You can take a bath and get rid of that awful stench and then rest for the night before we return tomorrow."
Kanuen nodded, still holding onto Hou Dong. He had thought that the merchants would stay longer in this town but he was happy that they would leave tomorrow already. This kind of place … He didn’t want to stay there. After just a few hours, there were too many bad memories. He wouldn’t be able to cope if he had to linger here.
Hou Dong motioned at his men to prepare everything for the next day and then brought Kanuen up to the room he had taken up. He hadn’t thought that things would turn out like this so he hadn’t prepared anything for Kanuen’s return. "Wait here for a moment. I’ll go and get everything ready for a bath."
Kanuen nodded and sat down on the edge of the bed. He looked at the door when Hou Dong stepped back outside and bit his lip. Hou Dong had just left but he couldn’t help but feel nervous. His heart thumped and a moment later, his hands trembled. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath to calm himself down but it didn’t help. His arms trembled and those whispers resounded in his ears.
Once upon a time, there was a mythical being. He was beautiful and compassionate and helped the pitiful humans that were crawling in the dirt.
Kanuen gulped. No. He didn’t want to remember this.
Yes, this being was beautiful beyond compare, he was ethereal in his gracefulness and unparalleled in his bearing.
He clenched his fists and pressed his eyes close, silently muttering a prayer to himself. Just a few moments. He only had to wait a few moments for Hou Dong to return.
Anyway, what was given could be taken away and they had found out that there were ways to make this being lose his magic. As for his beauty … A beautiful woman is naturally bound to lie below the body of a man. Such a beautiful being, it could only be fit to be a whore for mankind.
Kanuen’s eyes teared up. That guy might have been talking about an old story but it was obvious he had meant him. Each and every word had been targeted at him, basically telling him that he was beautiful and that this beauty meant he should be humiliated by everyone around him. That was why that man had wanted to give him that name. He wanted him to remember that story, to become that person the story talked about. A whore …
Kanuen shook. No! That wasn’t him. That was just a story. That man hadn’t even known that he would understand. It had nothing to do with him.
Kanuen knew. When he thought about it rationally, he knew. But he still couldn’t help but shiver. Would it be like this forever? Would he never be able to calm down as long as Hou Dong wasn’t with him?
The door finally opened and Hou Dong stepped in with a large basin under his right arm and a bucket filled with steaming water in his left hand. "I brought the basin and some water. Sun Jin and the others will bring some more." He put the basin down and poured the water inside before he turned to Kanuen.
As soon as he looked at his face, he froze. This … "You … You’ve been crying, haven’t you?" He went over, sitting down next to him and gripped his hands. Seeing how tense Kanuen was, he couldn’t help but feel guilty. Stupid! Why had he left him alone? Wasn’t it natural that Kanuen would feel like this? He should’ve known!
"I’m sorry." He leaned closer and pulled Kanuen into his arms, gently rubbing his back. He still had to face the other side though to escape the smell of the oil. Ah, he really felt like an idiot.
Kanuen hugged him back, taking a few deep breaths. The smell of dust and leather from Hou Dong’s body inexplicably calmed him down as if nothing had happened in the first place. He felt pathetic. "I’m the one who is sorry. This isn’t your fault. I … I shouldn’t be like this." He was already safe. Why did he still cry and shake like a leaf? Would that change anything? He should face this like a man.
Hou Dong shook his head. "It’s normal that you’re frightened. Don’t you worry."
Kanuen nodded and stayed in his arms, his fingers tightly gripping onto the fabric of his robe. Ah, as long as Hou Dong was with him, he would be able to get through this. And afterward … maybe being at home would calm him down. Well, he would see about that later. Maybe this man would stay with him for a while after what had happened. Even if it wasn’t forever, he might at least be with him for another few weeks. He felt that Hou Dong was that kind of person who wouldn’t do things halfheartedly.
Kanuen leaned back and cupped Hou Dong’s cheeks. "It’s alright. I just remembered for a moment. But I’m already feeling better now so you don’t have to worry about me. I’ll just wash off the scent and then we can look ahead."
Hou Dong nodded and gripped his hands, squeezing them to reassure him further. "Don’t worry too much. From now on, I’m here to protect you. Nobody will be able to do anything to you. We’ll leave tomorrow morning and well, you already know the plan. We’ll go back to the oasis and then we split up with the merchants, bringing you home."
Kanuen nodded but couldn’t help but worry. "What about the way to the oasis? If the merchants see me there … Wouldn’t they know that something happened?"
Hou Dong gave him a smile even though Kanuen wouldn’t be able to see it behind the cloth covering his face. Ah, Kanuen wasn’t just beautiful, he was also smart. Even after such a scare, he was able to grasp the key point this easily.
"You’re not wrong with that. We’ll have to make sure that they won’t notice you there but it shouldn’t be a problem. They don’t know too much about me and my men. Since we’re going through the desert, all of them will put on different clothes this time around, covering their faces and bodies as far as possible. Everyone will look roughly the same and the merchants won’t notice that there is one person more."
"You really think I could compare with your men? Even if you dress me up in the same clothes, I guess it would show." He looked down at his hands in Hou Dong’s. The different skin color was visible at a glance, never mind the difference in size. He wasn’t too small but his frame was much more slender than Hou Dong’s or that of any of his men. The merchants would be able to see the difference with just one glance.
"That would still require them to take a look. You really think they care about my men? Even if one of them died at the side of the road, they wouldn’t care. Isn’t that why they lied to us about this mission? They wanted us to work for cheap, not considering if that would put us into any danger. We’ll just let you ride somewhere in the back but they won’t look too often. In the distance, it’s hard to make out anyway just how big or small somebody is. They won’t notice."
Kanuen hesitated but finally nodded. Even though he had spent a few weeks with Hou Dong and his men now and had also seen how these merchants behaved, Hou Dong knew them even better. If he said they wouldn’t notice, then they wouldn’t. "Alright, then we’ll do it that way."
Hou Dong nodded and then motioned at the basin. "Then you should get in there now. Honestly, I can’t stand that smell."
Kanuen laughed and got up, walking over to the basin. "I guess I’ll have to then."
Hou Dong followed him over and stood behind him, wrapping him in his arms again. "Don’t worry too much. What happened won’t change anything between us. It’s really just … Well, wash it off, then I’ll give you a real hug." He kissed his cheek and then reached for Kanuen’s clothes.
"No!" Kanuen pushed him off and backed away before he even had time to think about it.
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