I’m standing around the corner of Brenden Theaters trying to get the nerve to walk up the steps and meet up with Issac and Ezra. A part of me, I’ll admit, is buzzing with anticipation. But the rest of me? Well, let’s just say it wants to go back home, crawl under the covers, and read. Or Sleep. Both sound great actually. Either way, I just want to get away from all these people.
I know they aren’t, but it feels like they’re watching me, and my brain is screaming at them to stop. They’re not looking at me, I have to keep reminding myself. They’re not. But the overwhelming feeling of self-consciousness doesn’t go away. Not that I really expected it to but that didn’t stop me from hoping.
Eventually, with 5 minutes left to spare, I’ve gathered enough courage to make it up the three-step stairs and greet them with a small wave and a nervous smile.
“Philip! You made it,” Issac says, coming closer with a big smile. He kisses me on both cheeks, which still makes me blush even though I should be used to it by now, and leads me to where Ezra is standing next to the line, waiting for us.
“Hey,” he says.
“Hey.” I laugh nervously and fidget with the strings of my hoodie.
“So we were thinking of- wait, hold on a sec. Issac, bend down for a minute.” He cocks an eyebrow but does as he’s told. Ezra puts his hands over Issac’s ears and leans in closer to me. “I have to do this so he doesn’t start singing again,” he whispers. “Anyways, we were thinking of watching Frozen 2, is that alright?”
Hearing him say that is, honestly, a huge relief. I’m always worried that if I’d ever said I wanted to watch Frozen 2 people would laugh at me or do something worse. But hearing this question come from a teenage, exact-age-yet-to-be-discovered, boy makes me incredibly happy to know I’m not the only one.
I smile and nod a tad bit more eagerly than I would've liked.
“Great,” he says, his voice returning to normal.
After having Ezra’s hands removed from his ears, Issac straightens up and stretches. “That hurt my back.”
“Yeah, well, I couldn’t risk you...” he trails off. “Never mind. The point is it had to be done.” He walks away without another word and stands at the end of the line.
Issac turns his attention back to me. “He’s just jealous ‘cause he can’t sing as good as me,” he mockingly boasts while dramatically running a hand through his hair, waving his hand in a big flourish as soon as it leaves the tips. I laugh at his ridiculousness and feel my nerves ease up a bit more.
He walks behind me, places his arms on my head- as if I needed a reminder of how short I am- and rests his chin on them.
“I think I’m gonna call you Evie from now on. Or maybe Ev,” he says.
I step forward, because I’m not an armrest, and turn around just in time to see him recover from the stumble before asking, “why?”
He shrugs. “I just like it.” Well, alrighty then…, I think. I guess I’m not getting a say in this.
“Nobody else can call you those, alright?” He continues. “I claim them as my nicknames for you and no one can use them except me!”
I chuckle and shake my head slightly. “Okay, Issac. Whatever you want.”
I had played it off like I didn’t really care that much about it but in reality I’m actually pretty happy to have pet names. It makes me feel special somehow; like we have some kind of unbreakable bond now or something. I’m probably just being dramatic but it’s how I feel, and the thought of it warms me up inside.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*
Here are a few things I learned about Issac half-way through Frozen 2: 1.) he gets very emotional while watching movies, 2.) he clings to people while he cries, and 3.) he’s a Talker so don’t sit next to him if you want to enjoy your movie peacefully. I can handle the Emotional Cry Clinging but the talking? Well, let’s just say I probably won’t be watching another movie with him anytime in the near future. But on the bright side, if he ever meets my older brother, Aaron, they’ll get along just fine.
As soon as we leave cinema 4, Issac starts attempting to sing Into the Unknown and dear lord have mercy on my soul because he is terrible! I thought Ezra was exaggerating earlier but now I definitely understand why he was trying to avoid Issac’s singing. I give Ezra a horrified look and he mouths ‘I know right,’ then laughs.
It’s not fun and games anymore, though. People are beginning to stare and, at this very moment, I really wish he’d shut the fuck up because it’s drawing way too much attention for me to handle. My thoughts keep begging for this to stop. Stop singing, stop staring, stop everything! Just stop! Then, suddenly all my emotions shift into a mixture of anger and sadness. I mumble something about going to the bathroom to Ezra and rush off before he can say anything. I had to get anyway because if I didn’t I was going to humiliate myself.
I barely make it to the safety of the stall before the first tear slides down my cheek. Fuck! I yell in my head, feeling my chest tighten as I draw it out, shouting over and over again. I angrily swipe at my cheeks and breathe heavily after I’m done, but it’s not long until the tears well up once more and the anger is replaced by sadness.
I lean against the door, making sure to cry as quietly as possible so no one can hear. God, you’re so pathetic; crying the bathroom stall for something so stupid. Besides, you can’t get mad at him for something that’s not his fault. I take deep breaths, the tears gradually coming to a stop. Why did I ever think I could actually go out, have fun, and be happy for once without something ruining it? How stupid of me. I shouldn’t have come here. This was a big mistake. I need to go home right now.
I dry my face, clean my glasses, flush the toilet, even though I didn’t use it, get out of the stall, wash my hands, and leave the bathroom. My misery is weighing me down and I’m drained from crying but I try not to let it show. Faking my smile like always.
“Hey, um, some, something come up actually,” I say when I reach Issac and Ezra. “I have, I have to go now.”
“Damn, I was hoping we could play some games at the arcade,” Issac replies, looking into the little room. “But if you have to leave we can always come back another day. Come on, I’ll drive you.”
“No, no, that’s okay.” I laugh nervously and I’m pretty sure my whole face is red.
“Are you sure? Because it’s really no problem.”
“No, seriously, I’m fine.”
“Oh, alright then…”
I desperately need to get out of here. “Um, yeah, so I’ll see you guys later.” I force a smile that makes my chest ache because of how dead it makes me feel inside, and wave goodbye to them before speed walking away. I don’t know if they didn’t notice my puffy, red eyes and fake smile or if they saw it and chose not to say anything, but either way, I just learned they’re not real friends.
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