I don’t even know how long I was gone. Probably a few hours. I went to get something to eat, and then decided to go to the movies. By myself. But who cares, I’m always by myself now. I’ve learned to accept it.

As I arrived home, I went through the front door and straight up the stairs, avoiding my parents. I opened my door, not bothering to close it behind me and just falling face down on my bed, one leg dangling off of the side of the mattress. I pressed my cheek against the pillow there, closing my eyes. I was exhausted, and didn’t feel like moving at all anymore.

I hadn’t even heard him come in.

I felt my bed dip beside me, and I groaned. Looking back and over my shoulder, I saw it was Song, and I frowned.

“I don’t want to talk to you.” I said, burying my face back in my pillow. He didn’t move, though, and I heard him sigh.

“I’m really sorry, Song. I didn’t know that you felt like that…”

I was silent. How did he not know? Is he that blind that he can’t see when he’ fucking up someone’s future and taking away their friends and family??!

“Go. Away.” I said, turning onto my side and pulling my knees to my chest. I felt like crying again, but there was no way that I would do that again in front of him.

I felt the bed move some more, and I widened my eyes slightly. He was laying right behind me.

“I don’t want to.” He replied, turning to face my back. I ignored him, so close to getting up and leaving the house again.

Suddenly, his arm slowly made its way around my waist, pulling my back to his chest and fitting my ass in his lap in a spooning position. I un-hugged my knees to smack his hand, but he only smacked my back, harder. What a child.

“You’re not resisting me.” He said quietly. I groaned and rolled my eyes at him. I really just wasn’t in the mood to put up with his bullshit.

“I’m tired, okay? Can you leave me alone now?”

“You should get tired more often.” He said. “Because you’re nicer, and I can cuddle into your warmth.”

I scrunched up my face, once again hitting his hand.

“Stop sounding creepy.”

Once again, he smacked mine back, harder than I had hit him, and then put his hand back on my clothed stomach.

“It’s true.” He said, pressing his forehead against the spot between my shoulder blades. “I like you better when you’re like this. Then I don’t have to fight you to be close to you.”

I was silent, fumbling with the part of my shirt that wasn’t being covered by Yunso’s large hand.

“I feel too weak to fight against you right now, Yunso.” I said dully, closing my eyes softly. It felt nice, honestly, to be in someone’s warm embrace and not alone, even if it was only a one-time thing.

“Why don’t you just stop trying to fight?” He responded, his fingers kneading my stomach through my shirt. “We’re brothers, we’re supposed to love each other, not fight.”

I wanted to snap at him, or laugh in his face, but his words hit different this time. He wanted to love me…? Is he really that stupid to see that he’s ruined my life, and I don’t want to “love” him back?

“Well, too bad.” I responded lamely instead, my hand moving comfortably to the center of my stomach, brushing against his hand. He sighed, long and deep, before grabbing my hand and lacing our fingers together. I was so tired… and this comfort felt nice right now. For the first time in forever, I didn’t feel a burning hatred towards Yunso.

“You’re tired.” He said, his thumb rubbing across the back of my hand. “And tomorrow is the weekend, so… sleep as long as you like.”

It almost sounded as if he was telling me to do. I scoffed at that, squeezing his hand. “Don’t tell me what to do, I’m your hyung.”

“You’re too childish to act like one…”

“What?!” I pulled my hand away from his and hit his arm, and this time he didn’t hit me back, but laughed.

“You act like a baby, Song. You put on stubborn fights and you’re the little spoon~”

I gasped at that, scooting away from his warm body and pulling my knees back to my chest. My plan, however, failed to work, and Yunso just reaches over, pulled my legs away from my chest, and put himself in the same position that he was earlier. I sighed, running my hand through my hair as he wrapped his arm around my waist.

“I don’t want to be the little spoon.” I said, a small pout on my face that I was honestly glad he couldn’t see. “I’m the oldest, I shouldn’t be in this position.”

“Fine then, do you want to spoon me?” He asked, tracing patterns onto my side. Slowly, I shook my head no. This felt nice, honestly, and I didn’t want to give it up.

“See, stubborn.” He said, and suddenly I felt a pair of soft, plump lips kiss the back of my head. I froze at that, my stomach swirling at the feeling. Did he just kiss my head??

“Yunso… don’t do that.” I said, pulling my hands to my chest and holding them there. Yunso nodded, continuing to rub my side instead.

Was this just a one-time thing? Would he forget about me, or… whatever this is ... tomorrow? Was it an act?

“Ever since I first came into your home, I wanted to be friends with you, Song.” He said softly, pressing his forehead to the back of my neck. “But you kept pushing me away, so I tried to become friends with mom and dad instead.”

No. That wasn’t true. I remember actually liking him when he was first brought home! And then that little shit started to rip my parents from me, and take everything that I loved! I even had to move out of my old room so that Yunso could have it and I could have the smaller one! And if he wanted to be “friends” with mom and dad, he didn’t have to break me down, or take things that I did and master then so that he was better… making me insignificant and boring, with no talent to share for anyone.

I hadn’t even noticed it, but I had tears running down my cheeks. Suddenly, I hiccuped, covering my mouth with my hand. But Yunso had already heard, and he turned me to face him, shaking his head softly.

“No, Song, don’t cry…” He said, pulling my head into his chest and rubbing his strong hand up and down my back. I shivered, more tears silently rolling down my face and soaking into his shirt. I had always wanted comfort like this, but have never gotten it up until now. And honestly, it felt amazing, and I didn’t want it to go away.

“Y-Yunso…” I said, balling my fist into his shirt. “Don’t leave me… d-don’t pretend like I don’t exist anymore, please…”

Yunso nodded, moving his hand under my shirt to rub my back with his strong hands. I kept on kneading his shirt, my light sobs eventually dying down until I fell asleep.