Zuma
In the morning when we woke up and got ready, Baba called us down to the dining room to have a family meeting.I wonder what could it be? This time Alastor got Kiran ready and came out of the nursery with his hair a mess and scratches. i guess kiran is putting up more of a fight than i thought he could. We finally reach to the dining room to see Helen and Babas eyes puffy.
"Dear lord you both look like hell what has happened."
"Zuma please take seat and hand me Kiran."
I handed Baba the cooing baby and took a seat next to him. As usual Alastor sat near his mother, i noticed Helen continuously looking at Aires empty seat, and more tears forming in her eyes.
"Baba w-w-what has happened, you both are scaring me."
"Well on Aires way back they were ambushed my rebels, he, he didnt make it, he killed most of the rebels but one of them shot him in the back like coward. He fought to the end, the bastard that, that, that killed him is being put on trial tomorrow. I want you all to be there."
I began weeping and so did Helen. Alastor hugged her but she pushed him away.I ran to him and hugged him, it was more for him than for me, Aires became my brother the short time that i knew him but he was Alastors brother, he knew his entire life. Alastor hugged me back and i felt his breathing become unsteady. I guess he is the type that cries silently. My Aires my mischevious brave Aires. You were of the many few that i trust, you always had my back, you showed me your scars as i showed you mine. Who ever did this i will see you tomorrow and i will make you pay, with your life, it will only pay off a small fraction for his but i will be enough for me.I am not violent but best believe tomorrow i will be. Everyone went about the day very quietly, Alastor disappeared off to somewhere,I tried to comfort him but he shoved me aside hard and walked off, i almost dropped Kiran. Allen, Kiran and i have been in the garden all day, poor Allen shed enough tears to fill a pond. Kiran whined most of the day, i guess even he knows that something isnt right. Oh my dear i am so sorry you didnt get to meet your uncle, he was a fantastically wonderful person. When it got late i took Allen to bed and tucked him in, I let him hold Kiran until he fell asleep, the two fell asleep with Kiran holding onto Allen with his tin hands. They really do look good together. I pick up my sleeping baby, blow out the candles, and exited his room. I walk to the kitchen, get some milk and returned to the room. I give him a bath and put him to bed. I spend the rest of the night walking the grounds of the palace, what was i to do. I actually didnt even want to put Kiran down i was scared someone wanted to hurt my life line. I just walk around in a restless state in my night wear. I know it is a bit inappropriate but i dont care, i am in pain and i am tired of it, today has been a mess, i am filled with so much anger that i feel like i dont even know myself anymore. I want to strangle Alastor for nearly making me drop my baby, but at the same time i want to hold him close. I want to murder that bastard that took my Aires from me with my bare hands, but deep down i know that isnt me, well until a scratch is layed on Kiran, because then best believe i will commit murder in a heart beat. I hear voices coming from the end of the hallway and remember what i was wearing, i turn out is was three guards, i can only wish they give me a reason to hit someone. When they see me they all begin blushing and clearing their throats.I know that i am wearing a thin white shirt with two buttons undone at the top and loose pants. If Alastor saw me he would kill me for waking around like this.
"Excuse us Zuma but what are you doing up an about at this hour."
"Clearing my head."
"Oh ok then have a good night we will be on our way."
All of them rushed past me and quickly disappeared around the corner. I feel so tired, yet i dont want to go to sleep. I continue to wonder around aimlessly and find myself in a large room filled with weapons.Knives and all the fixings. There was a heavy set bearded man in the corner working on something.Hmm i could use a small dager.
"Excuse me sir but what are all of these used for?"
He slowly turned away from his work with a scowl already forming on his face, goodness the dont need all these weapons all they need is to have the enemy look at this man face and they will be running for the hills. I am too tired to bother being scared all i want is a daggar.
"Depends who's asking?"
He grasped a large sword at his side and stood, oh come im not even a threat to a butterfly much less you being as large as you are.
"My name is Zuma, nice to meet you."
"Ah Zuma ay i have heard that name lingering around the palace, you have all the guards wrapped around your finger you know. Anyways nice to meet you Zuma my name is Henry.To answer your question these weapons are mainly for any one who needs them, for example if the King wants a sword hidden in his room then he comes in here chooses one and signs a paper saying he has it so that when i do inventory i know what is supposed to be here."
"Oh wow you have to do inventory for all of these?"
I am now looking at the three walls covered completely with weapons.
"Yes i do, over the years it has become quite easy, do you wish to have one it would make my inventory a little easier."
"Yes actually, mind if i look around i am not very familiar with weapons."
"Not at all just let me know when you have picked one so you can sign for it."
"Ok i will"
I walk to the wall on my left that had small knives that you could easily fit in your pocket an don the right there were the covers for the blades.I would certainly want one for when Kiran starts crawling, dear lord. Something out of the corner of my eye shines, as i come closer i see the beauty that was smiling at me.It was a small knife with a black handle, i took it of the wall and looked at it more loosely, there was a rose at the top of the handle and had the stem of the rose wrapped around the handle.It was so detailed even the thorns looked deadly, i like it, small enough to easily concieled but big enough to inflict pain. I walk to the wall on the right an d find an odd looking cover.It had all these other parts, when i took a closer look it was to be attached to your hand and the knife it was fitted for would fit on the under side of your arm. I put it back its not my style i dont plan on having the knife that close to my body at all times. I walk to the end of the right wall closer to the third an d find a cover attached to a thin silver chain that can easily be attached to anywhere,oh i like this. I slide the knife in and it fits perfectly, plus its black so they math in a sence. I walk over to Henry and show him my choice.
"Ah what a beauty, here is the paper work."
I read it carefully then signed.
"Might i ask you what you wanted that for?"
"Well sine my son Kiran was born i have been quite protective, i simply wantet some thing in case one day i need to draw blood."
"No arguement here, my wife was the same way, i remember the first time i almost dropped my son, she nearly threw the kitchen knife at my head."
"Honestly i felt like i wanted to choke Alastor today when he bumped me nearly making me drop Kiran"
"Oh dear he should be careful."
"He is lucky i am not ready to commit murder, anyways ill let you get back to work have a good night."
"You as well Zuma"
I left the room ,hid the knife in my long sleeves and found my way into Kiran nursery.I just sat by his crib and watched him sleep, what else was i to do, i feel like i wanted to cry but i had no tears left, My body feels so heavy yet it doesnt want to rest, all i want to do now is to talk to someone, but Alastor is gone off to somewhere.Why is it that when i need him he is always gone, pregnancy, birth, now this, jesus please take away this misery. I pick up Kiran carefully not to wake him and take him to our room.I dont want to be alone tonight. I put the knife in my dresser and sit in the middle of the bed with him at my side. Oh Aires my sweet sweet Aires, why did it have to be you, of all the people in this world why did it have to be you. I will keep my promise dont worry, no one will ever hurt my child not even Alastor, not Baba,not Helen, no one.You grew up knowing pain and yet still you were as sweet as sugar, i never knew anyone sweeter than you. will make sure Kiran will know you as much as i do, i promise. A smile grows on my face and one tear runs down my cheek, just then i feel like i deserve to sleep, i have peace now but i know i will have anger tomorrow. Kiran is now awake and is looking at me with his big purple eyes identical to mine. I lay next to him and pull him in close, as soon as my eyes shut i hear the room door open, oh god what now. As i sit up in my bed and look around i see Alastor at the door, finally you decide to return at five in the morning.
"Alastor where were you?"
"It is none of your concern, why isnt Kiran in his nursery?"
"I didnt want to be alone tonight."
"Well your not alone anymore, put him back in his nursery."
Is he serious i am too tired for this my feet hurt for walking around bare foot for three hours.
"I want to sleep with him tonight i will be in the nursery if you need me."
"There is no bed for you in there."
"At this point i could fall asleep while riding a horse.I will sleep in the rocking chair."
Its my turn disappear now, i need rest. As i walk to the door i feel his heavy hand on my shoulder, Kiran begins tugging my hair and squealing in annoyance.
"Why were you walking around in your night wear, guards saw you."
"I needed to clear my head and frankly didnt care."
"Please dont do it again."
"Why?"
"......."
Oh for goodness sake he cant be mad at me its not like i am calling the guards into my bed.A walk pass him quickly, i swear if i stand there much longer i might actually get crossed with him. As i reach the nursery i feel at peace, like a weight has been lifted off my shoulder, like a dark cloud has vanished, perhaps its the calming baby blue color. I sit in the rocking chair,Hold kiran and close my eyes.I wake up about an hour later in a different room, Kiran isnt in my arms and i fly up out off the bed.When i look around i realize that i am in my room and Alastor is asleep next to me. He must have taken me from the nursery but why, his back is turned away from me and he is nearly to the edge of the bed, what is with him.This had better not be because of the whole night clothes situation. I get up out of bed to go check on kiran, honestly he is the only thing holding me together.
"Where are you going?"
It was Alastor who now sat on the edge of the bed rubbing his face.I really cant deal with him right now.
"I am going to wonder around the world aimlessly in my nightwear."
His face hardens at my sarcastic reply.
"Be serious Zuma."
"I am going to check on Kiran"
"Why you slept with him all night didn't you."
"Alastor you have your ways of coping i have mine, plus some human contact at this point might just warm up my heart."
"Human contact, is that what you want? Then come here."
"I would have to decline i still want to check on him."
"Fine go sell yourself to the guards, just like your SISTER."
"EXCUSE ME! Alastor i know you are having a hard time but dont take it out on me and dont bring my sister into this.First of all i was walking around to be away from people, i didnt expect to see those guard nor did i want to, second of all, my sister got intimately involved with the guards while i just walked past them,third of all it is not like i was walking around shirtless and in swim trunks, i would call that selling myself. You know what before i say something i might regret i am going to walk away, sleep off ever your feeling because i dont want to deal with you, not now, rest you will need it for the trial."
He said something but i walked out with tears already streaming down my face, how could he say such a thing to me, with one sentence he ruined the peace i felt, i didnt bother stayng in the nursery, i looked in and saw Kiran sleeping then went upstairs to the study. I just sat there and cried, what more could i do, i am too tired to do anything else, all i wanted to do this morning was check on my son and crawl back into the bed with the man i love, at this point i dont think there will be a wedding anytime soon. I ended up falling asleep in the study.Hours later i felt a warm hand on my back, when i woke up it was baba.
"These tears arent for Aires are they?"
"It doesnt matter, oh my , what time is it?"
"I will tell you after you tell me what is wrong."
"It really doesnt matter you have enough going on."
"I am done grieving Zuma i am at peace with his death, but now i am worried why you are in a dusty old study in with tears marks all over your face your nose and ears are red and so are your eyes.This worries me, what is wrong."
"Nothing."
I know what you are thinking why didnt i just tell him but he will be mad at Alastor and right now he doesnt need that.
"Why are you protecting him?"
"He lost his brother."
"That doesnt mean he should make you miserable."
"Fine, last night i needed to clear my head and i was walking around the corridors in my nightwear barefoot.There were some guards along the way and they saw me.Somehow Alastor found out and he wasnt pleased.I really didnt care, all i wanted to do in that time was cry but i didnt have an tears left so i just kept walking until i got blisters.I went back to the nursery and fell asleep with Kiran in my arms and i was at peace with Aires death, apparently Alastor moved me to the room but kept his distance since our conversation about my wondering around. This morning i wanted to check on kiran and on my way out i made a sarcastic comment about wondering the world dressing like this when he asked where i was going. He told me to go sell myself to the guards, i couldnt do it i was too tired i only had one hour of sleep and was completely drained of energy. I told him off and ,well tears were shed , looked in on kiran and came up here. I didnt want to see his face so here we are."
"That was a horrible thing to say."
"Wait how did you find me?"
"Alastor came to my room worried sick that he couldnt find you and thought that you actually went to sell yourself and felt guilty about it.He is in the nursery with little kiran crying."
"Serves him right, he didnt want me to check on him now he has to deal with him."
"Come Zuam i dont mind punishing Alastor but i cant stand seeing Kirans sad little face."
"Ok but only if you carry me there."
"Its a deal."
I jumped into his arms and he carried me into the nursery. The moment he puts me down Alastors eyes meet mine, honestly all i want is Kiran to stop crying. I walk over to him and extend my arms, when i look back to thank baba he is one.
"Where were you, i was worried, you werent in the nursery."
"Can i have him please, i dont like to hear him cry."
"Answer me"
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