Turns out Kasey was waiting at my apartment.

“Where have you been?” she calls. “I thought you just had to give Aiden Callahan a ride somewhere.”

“It very much turned into a whole thing,” I announce, dropping my bag and tossing my keys onto my kitchen counter. “Are you in my bed? I’m making something to eat. All I’ve had since lunch is a caramel macchiato.”

Kasey appears in the doorway of my bedroom and leans against the wall, watching me extract some bread from the pile of stuff on top of the fridge.

“Are you seriously going to start talking about food and not tell me what happened with Aiden Callahan and the Whole Thing?”

“Aiden Callahan and the Whole Thing sounds like a band, but not one I’d really want to see in concert.” I drop some slices in the toaster. “I don’t even know where to start. There was a lot.”

“Lay it on me, darling.” Kasey takes a seat at my kitchen counter.

“First of all, he shaved and got a haircut. He’s sort of - very hot now.”

“He was hot in high school,” Kasey answers, quirking her eyebrow. “You didn’t realize that? Is that all that happened?”

“How could you think he was hot in high school? He was a total asshole.”

“You can be a total asshole and still be hot. It happens.”

“Alas. Life is unfair.”

“Jamie, did you literally come in here that worked up because Aiden shaved his beard?”

I launch into an explanation of everything Kasey missed today, and she listens closely, her eyes bright with interest. The story eventually comes to an abrupt end when my toast goes up in smoke.

“So then I just drove off,” I finish, talking over my shoulder while using a pair of tongs to run the burning toast under the tap. Kasey is thoughtful, with a finger pressed to her chin.

“Did he say why he was moving here?”

“He said he was trying to come back for the funeral.”

“Yeah, that’s why he came back, but why is he actually moving back?” Kasey leans up onto her elbows as I go about fixing myself a bowl of cereal. “Did you really not ask him?”

“We’re not like, buddies, I don’t know what is and isn’t cool for me to ask him!” I answer, affronted. “We are enemies. He’s my nemesis. We’re nemeses. Nemisi? What’s the - hang on - Siri, what is the plural of-”

“Oh, yeah, you’re just two arch-nemeses who spent the afternoon apartment hunting together, at the end of which you made a recommendation that he took, and then he thanked you for it, and then you gave him a ride home and offered to give him a ride back, which he politely declined, right?”

“Right…”

“That’s real heavy arch-nemesis stuff right there. Batman and Joker could never.” Kasey pauses, and when she speaks again, her tone has changed. “Jamie, you really do look far away. Are you alright?”

“I’m fine. It’s just been a really weird week. I guess I’m kind of tired.” I rub my eyes. Distant memories I’ve long kept pushed down are now starting to slowly stir in my mind: me as a teary-eyed kid, leaning against the back wall of our school with my arms wrapped around my knees, crying hard. A younger Kasey is at my side, muttering to herself and rubbing my back through my shirt.

I’m gonna punch that guy in the fucking face someday, she’s saying, Don’t listen to him, Jamie, he’s a dumbass who thinks he’s special cause he’s tall… Are you listening to me, Jamie? Jamie?

“Jamie.” Present-day Kasey waves a hand in front of my face. “Where’d you just go?”

“Someplace shitty.” I shake my head, trying to clear away the memory like it’s smoke hanging around my face. Kasey’s eyes fill up with some expression that makes me look away; she’s always been the protective one of the two of us, and she was one of the few who dared to fire back at Aiden in high school. She was basically five feet tall, but that never stopped her. Even to openly scowl at Aiden felt as dangerous as slapping his face (at least back then) - and yet Kasey would plant herself between the two of us and tell him off and poke him in the chest while doing it.

Eventually I asked her to stop. Aiden was always worse when he caught me without her, after she did that. He technically never laid a finger on me, or on anyone at school, and yet his presence used to feel like a constant threat. He would lurk around with his girlfriend Melanie hanging onto his shoulders and his every word. One of the most surprising things about Aiden’s immediate departure after high school was that Melanie was still very much in Ketterbridge when he quietly packed everything up and took off. In my mind, she was the only one who didn’t seem surprised, but she was mad.

“I wonder what Melanie is up to these days,” I murmur, half to myself.

“Melanie?” Kasey’s lips twist. “Aiden’s ex-girlfriend? Why?”

“No reason.” I run a hand through my hair.

“You’re in a mood,” she observes. “It’s a good thing. Remember this facial expression, cause you should use it more often, at least for a few weeks. People are going to start wondering why you aren’t sadder. You put on a good face at the funeral, but you’ve just been yourself ever since. I’m surprised no one’s said anything about it already.”

“Kent said something, but it was like he forgot about it right after.” I tap my fingers on the counter.

“God, Jamie. I’ve never known you to be so quiet. Are you okay? You’re freaking me out.”

“I’m freaking you out? You freak me out.”

“You freak me out!” she insists, and I drop my head onto my arms, unfortunately forgetting about the bowl of Froot Loops I had set out for myself on the counter. Some of my hair definitely got in it. I set it aside with a deep sigh. Kasey turns and drifts to the window.

“I don’t know. I don’t know why I’m being weird.” I dump the cereal down the drain regretfully and set it next to the soggy piece of burnt toast. “I guess I’m probably hungry. What’s easier to make than cereal and toast?”

“Jamie.”

“I know. I’m fucking hopeless. I think I’m just gonna have some Cheez-Its.”

“Jamie.” Kasey turns to look at me from her spot by the window. She points through the glass to something I can’t see from here.

“What?” I ask, turning to reach for the Cheez-Its.

“It’s Aiden. He’s outside.”

~~~~

I have no idea why I assumed that he would be looking up at my window. He is not. He’s just standing in the middle of the empty street, wearing a snapback - to keep the rain out of his eyes, I guess? More bizarrely still, he’s got a map unfolded in his hands, and he’s standing there staring at it like he’s an explorer at the wheel of a ship. The dark green leaves of the trees lining the street sort of complete the picture: in the wind, they almost look like waves.

I can tell even from here that his face is screwed up in concentration. As I watch he traces a finger over a line on the map, then shakes his head and seems to start over. It’s the last glimpse I see before grabbing my raincoat and rushing to the stairs.

“Hey,” I call through the rain, pulling up my hood as I jog over to him. He lowers the map, surprised, and turns to face me. “That’s my window. Right there.” I point up to it. Kasey has disappeared. Aiden’s gaze skips up to my apartment, then back to me, puzzled.

“Okay?”

“I mean, I assumed you were looking for me. Out here in the rain, outside of my apartment window? You’re not as coy as you think, Aiden.”

“That’s enough out of you.” He points a threatening finger at my chest. I realize it was a joking gesture one second too late: my Aiden-instincts from high school kick in and I flinch, taking an involuntary step back. The teasing smile that had been on his face drops away instantly, and he clears his throat, folding up his map. I get the sense he’s gathering himself to try and say something, but the awkward silence lasts too long and I can’t help but fill it.

“So, are you lost? Because that’s embarrassing, if so. Kent’s place is literally down the street.”

“I already dropped my stuff off at Kent’s. I was, um.” He tucks the map into his tan-colored jacket and zips the front closed. “Just trying to remember where everything is.”

“Oh, okay. That’s funny, cause I feel like you’re definitely looking for something specific and you just don’t want to tell me what it is.”

“You are so nosy, you know that?”

Looking for Melanie’s place? I catch it right on the tip of my tongue. A flash of embarrassment races through me. I can’t believe I nearly said that.

“How about this, Aiden, if you don’t want to tell me what you’re doing, I’m just going to guess and then assume that my guess is correct.”

“Fine, go ahead.”

“My guess is that you’re wearing AirPods under that snapback and you’re out here dancing to Natasha Beddingfield’s Unwritten and-”

“No. Nope.”

“Feel the rain on your skin, no one else can feel it for you, only you-”

Aiden surprises me by planting his forefinger over my lips, holding them shut.

“There. That’s better. So much better, in fact.”

He yelps when I lick his finger, retracting it at once and then glaring at me.

“That’s better,” I amend. “So. Where are we going, then?”

“We? We are not going anywhere.”

“Cool, so you’re just gonna roam around until the rain dissolves your map?”

“It’s none of your business where I’m going, Jamie.”

I hesitate, an unpleasant thought occurring to me.

“You’re not - trying to find your way back to that bar we saw earlier, are you?” I ask, dropping my volume.

“What? No.” He rubs his eyes in frustration - either something he does a lot, or something he only does a lot around me (I suspect the latter, but it’s fine).

“Okay, so why don’t you want to tell me where you’re going? You may have forgotten this, but everyone in Ketterbridge pretty much knows everything going on with everyone else in Ketterbridge, so I’m going to find out anyway. Unless you’re already trying to skip town, in which case, you forgot your backpack with your one towel in it or whatever-”

“Jamie,” he interrupts. “I was trying to find my way to the cemetery.” I pause, surprised, and he continues before I can say anything. “You know, to pay my respects? I don’t remember where it is. I’ve only been there once, and that was in high school, and I was very drunk.”

I don’t know exactly what to say to that, and for a dreadful moment silence takes over, while I just stand there flexing and unflexing my fingers. Aiden waits, watching me, until I am forced to be the one to speak.

“Okay, I have to ask, Aiden. What’s the deal? You’ve been gone for like ten years-”

“I’ve been gone for eight years,” he corrects. “Why does everyone think it was so much longer?”

“Eight years, then, and then you just show back up in town when you hear about the funeral? Why do you even care about what happened to her? You two never even liked each other, in fact you guys hated each other for all of high school, so why would her death be a reason for-”

“Because!” Aiden cuts me off, sounding strained. “She died before -” He stops, his jaw working, and takes a breath. “It’s just that... now there's someone who I'll never get the chance to make things up to. What happened made me realize that I don’t have all the time I thought. To - you know, to make things right.” He sighs, pressing his fingers to his brow bone. “And I didn’t want to tell you where I was going because I figured you probably don’t want to talk about her.”

So he’s… in town to make things right? Eight years separate the Aiden I knew from the Aiden that’s here right now, and I can’t help but wonder just what the hell went down during those years to change him this much. I mean, he’s clearly gotten sober, and that’s a big change. But there’s no way that accounts for everything that’s different about him. The Aiden of the olden days was as remorseless as they come. Never a word of apology, never an indication that he was sorry or regretted his behavior. It feels weird to think that it’s the same person looking at me now, because this person looks genuinely sorry.

Then again. I’m also wondering if he’s really exactly the same and this is all some long build-up to a joke, or some small aspect of a bigger, shady plan he’s got going. There’s a possibility. But some part of me insists that even Aiden Callahan is not a bad enough guy to use the recent death of one of my best friends for such a scheme. After all, he doesn’t know that she’s currently up in my apartment, probably watching from the window and making rude comments I’m too far away to hear.

Maybe Aiden would lie to my face. Maybe I’m giving him too much credit because he’s cute, like everyone did in high school. The truth is, I don’t know who he is anymore.

“Come on,” I tell him, pulling my keys out of my pocket. I turn and set off up the street, and after a moment hear his splashing footfalls trailing after me.

“Where are we going?”

“To the flower shop. If you want to visit her grave and pay your respects, you have to bring flowers, and I’m the only one who would know what kind she’d like, so you’re in luck.”

“Why do you keep helping me, dude?”

“What do you mean?” I ask, moving briskly through the rain.

“I mean, given everything that happened the last time we saw each other, I expected that you wouldn’t even give me the time of day, and I figured that was fair. But here you are giving me rides and helping me find apartments and pick flowers for the cemetery and-”

“I guess I’m just a super cool person.”

“You are super cool,” he agrees, and I glance over at him, surprised. This particular statement from Aiden is going to need some further reflection later.

“No, I agree, like obviously I am. And not just cool in a helpful way, I’m just an overall cool guy. Just so you know.”

“I think there’s a Froot Loop stuck in your hair,” he answers, and extracts it for me.

We make it to the flower shop quickly; nothing in Ketterbridge is all that far away from anything else. Aiden waits behind me while I unlock the store. We’re closed for the day, which means I’m opening the door into darkness, but this is my favorite way to be here. The sweet-smelling, shadowy darkness of the closed shop that means I am in one of my favorite places, and there with only my favorite people. Of course, now I’m here with Aiden, but this is an unusual case.

“Alright,” Aiden says, stepping into the shop behind me and pulling off his hood. “What kind of flowers would Kasey like for her grave, then?”