"I will try," Frozen Milk acted high and mighty, like a true Lord he seated himself on the toilet.

The merchant clapped and praises rained down on Frozen Milk while in his heart he grimaced and ridiculed the humiliating sight that Frozen Milk was.

"Very well!" Frozen Milk was too immersed in his acting, "this toilet is very suitable for this 'Excellency' here."

"Yes, yes! Oh yes, Your Excellency!" like a leech the merchant climbed high on the ladder of Frozen Milk's ego and continued to bask at the top with sunglasses and a cocktail.

Frozen Milk slammed the money on the table. He was a Lord that magnanimously gave his subject his bread money.

Frozen Milk was loaded but where did all the money come from? If one was a lowly cannon fodder, one must aspire to become bigger.

Frozen Milk changed from the exploitable cannon fodder to the cannon fodder that exploited others. In other words, he turned from scum to lumps of cumulated scum.

In other, other words, he stole the money.

At first, Frozen Milk wasn't proud of it but then he justified it as his need to survive and actually got so good at it he became richer than a city lord.

But where did all the money go? Like now, Frozen Milk was swindled many times, always believing he could never be fooled.

His ego was one of his punishments. The readers would be overjoyed.

With the big, golden toilet where parts of the gold paint already peeled off, Frozen Milk triumphantly marched down the streets. He basked in all the awe and admiring stares of the passer-by.

At least in his head. What actually went on in everyone's head… everyone could already guess.

Finally, Frozen Milk reached the bottom of the mountain. This mountain was the one where the monks resided and deep in the mountains was a large paradise.

But the path up the mountain was steep and dangerous, so Frozen Milk contemplated how in the world he would carry this toilet with him.

Just then an angelic voice appeared and freed Frozen Milk from his suffering only to push him deeper into a lava pit of tormenting nightmares.

"Do you need help?"

"Ah yes, pl-" Frozen Milk turned to the source of the voice with an arrogant bearing when his face contorted into that of a monster-hybrid-demon-whatever creature he as an author could think of.

How was this possible? Frozen Milk cursed and cursed and cursed inside his head.

He stood there frozen when BING:

"Congratulation host! Host unlocked the second challenge! Please get along with the protagonist!"

"Wai-" but the system already disappeared.

"Fuck," Frozen Milk screamed in his head. That damned, self-pleasing system popped up and went as it wanted like a female playing hard to get with her crush she obsessed over!

"Is there a problem?" the handsome protagonist smiled at Frozen Milk and in an instant all thoughts and feelings of his evaporated.

Frozen Milk was just a shell, a shell for fangirls to claim and possess so they could lick all parts of this other-worldly protagonist who just seemed to emit pheromones 24/7.

"Damn," Frozen Milk had to stop his drool again. Why in the world were his main characters so bloody attracting?

What was with this sex appeal this guy oozed out? The protagonist was fully clothed, yet it still felt like he was literally violating Frozen Milk in a pleasurable way in his head.

"Are you shy?" the protagonist winked at Frozen Milk and came closer.

No, no, no! Now, Frozen Milk knew how it was possible for the protagonist to bed all 5000 women. 

He actually thought it was impossible and only wrote this fact to take the piss out of the tropes, out of his readers but now standing in front this walking cliché, Frozen Milk could really see what kind of unimaginable things his protagonist was capable of.

And oh darn, how Frozen Milk could imagine himself to be pushed down and do *** things or the protagonist do *** things to him.

Frozen Milk was truly falling down an endless pit of self-hate and fascination.

Yes, yes, he was the author.

Yes, yes, he was actually proud to have written this book and since this book was still not finished any ending was possible.

Hehehehehe, Frozen Milk was ready to die of blood loss.

Hehehehehe, his poor nose.

FUCK, WHERE ARE THE BEAUTIES?