To my birth family,

As promised: my hair tangent begins.

Hair is something we take pride in having or not having.

I like having long hair. When I was a kid I went through a phase when I wanted to be Rapunzel, though Mum kept telling me she was a fictional character and that I had to at least trim my hair.

In high school I donated my hair to charity (apparently they can make wigs out of it for cancer patients), cutting off a nice 8”, which made my head feel a lot lighter. Left with a long bob, I found showering to be much quicker, and it was easier not to get caught in doors.

Now that my hair’s grown out again I keep it clean and brushed as best I can. Sadly, I’m not that creative when it comes to hair dos. I often go with the basic ponytail for school and a bun for work.

One thing I always had in common with all the girls was the bangs phase. Every parent thinks it’s cute for their toddlers to get bangs. I mean, yeah, it’s less hair to brush every day and it makes for a cute photo, but why is that the go-to cute look? I mean, parents even make boys have bangs, but they call them mushroom cuts (I commented on a classmate’s bangs when he was younger and he got mad at me and said firmly, “It’s a mushroom cut! Bangs are girly!”).

Because of bangs’ associations with children, especially girls, I let mine grow out leading up to the end of high school. My classmates had all grown their bangs out, and I didn’t want to stand out. Toward the end of high school, however, bangs made a resurgence.

A couple of my schoolmates got bangs, which made them look younger. I also watched asian dramas where it’s hard to find female leads who don’t have bangs. Is it a cultural thing? I mean, I’ve met tons of Chinese girls who don’t have bangs, but in the media it’s like bangs = Chinese girl. Maybe I need to talk to a mainlander to get it.

So yeah, I followed the trend, too. When I look in the mirror I’m reminded of a Chinese comic I once read where the female lead’s bangs make her look like a jellyfish, so she’s nicknamed as such.

No one calls me a jellyfish, but it’s fun to imagine being one. But I can’t swim very well.

I’m thinking of donating my hair again, so when you meet me I might be back to the long bob, or “lob,” as Mum calls it (I didn’t believe her at first when she said it was a thing). It’d still be long enough to braid, so if you’re the type of people who like to play with hair you won’t be disappointed.

Anyway, I’ve been wondering: Did ancient Chinese really use all those accessories in their hair, you know, the stuff in the dramas? Wouldn’t those fancy pins weigh your head down and give you headaches?

Hopefully my next letter to you will be less . . . Lillian. I’ll talk about Su for a bit. Siblings are always a good conversation topic, don’t you think?

Sincerely,

Lillian