Kaelum was doing the almost mindless labour while using the breathing technique that Tiela had taught him. Not only did the breathing technique make it easier to carry the heavy wood, but he had also realized that a bit of mana was starting to form in his mana heart as a result of him using the breathing technique. It wasn't much, but it was his very own mana!
The mana would flow from his mana heart, through the veins Tiela and him had opened up and then loop back around and do it again when he used the breathing technique. Building up a bit more mana every time it completed a revolution. He was excited to have his own mana. It felt similar to Tiela’s cold mana.
The excitement he was feeling from the mana flowing through his partially opened veins was somewhat dampened when he thought of what Karrow had told him this morning.
Immediately after Karrow told them that the princess had left, Tiela receded into his soul space and hadn’t said another word. Being left alone with her thoughts, Tiela had no idea what to do. She felt like she lost her chance and wasn’t in control of anything, it reminded her of when her mother died and she felt just as helpless.
She just found out that Kaelum had gotten his first job and while she tried to hide it, she felt a sense of betrayal. She knew it was stupid, but she had unconsciously just assumed that Kaelum would be going along with her to help. Hearing that he got a job that would tie him down to Arum made Tiela realize that her cause was her own, she wasn’t even sure if Kaelum believed her. She felt more alone than ever and she had just lost her one chance at stopping the disasters in the future from happening.
It’s not like she could just ask Kaelum to up and leave his life to chase the princess. He didn’t owe her anything and he wasn’t even committed to her cause. Even if she asked him to, she wasn’t sure that Kaelum would go for her.
But she also couldn’t just waste away in his soul space, she truly had no idea what to do. Now that she thought about it, they had done nothing but bicker and banter over the past few days.
She hated to admit it, but she felt closer to Kaelum than she had become with anyone over the course of the wars before her death. While she was sure that the teenage boy barely tolerated her, let alone had friendly feelings toward her. After all, he was just trying to get rid of her, and the only thing he got in return for trying to help her was injuries from Aquila.
While Tiela’s thoughts were racing around her mind, Kaelum was left feeling a little lonely hauling wood on his own all day, but his ego wouldn’t let him call out to Tiela. Also, he had no idea what he would even say to her.
Tiela wasn’t letting any of her thoughts slip through the bond, so he had no idea what she was feeling right now.
Alone with the mindless labour, Kaelum thought on what this all meant. The princess left Arum, so now what? Was he supposed to just follow her around the kingdom and keep trying to sneak into her bedroom?
No, that hadn’t worked so far, and it would probably end in him getting killed. Further, Kaelum asked himself, did he really want to? He hadn’t seen this so-called future Tiela spoke of, and he wasn’t even sure if she was telling the truth. Sure, it was weird that he had another soul inside of his own soul space, but that didn’t mean that she had actually seen the future. She could just be some crazy wandering soul or something.
She did teach him a real spell, which was cool and she looked a lot like the princess… So, say she really was telling the truth. Could Kaelum really go talk to the princess and change the future? Him? He was just some random orphan, Tiela’s own words.
This is the kind situation that would happen to a knight or a king or something, not Kaelum. Kaelum had no trouble admitting that he couldn’t even hope to affect the end of the world. Aside from his dodging and sneaking skills, he didn’t have much else in the way of talent. Well... he did have the ability to eat spoiled food without any trouble, though that was just a result of his diet. Aside from that, though, he couldn’t think of any other skills or talents, though it hurt to admit it.
He was used to spending his days rummaging through trash and stealing food or playing tricks with Peake and the others. It should have been a powerful knight that Tiela got stuck with, not him. But the reality was, she was stuck with Kaelum.
So what could Kaelum do? For just a second, he entertained the idea that he could be like one of the knights from the fairytales, only for a second though. Kaelum knew better than anyone else how impossible that was for someone like him. Sure, he had learned a spell and even had a little bit of his own mana now. But Kaelum knew there was more to a knight than a single spell. Knights were people with huge powerful magics and medicine and powerful families. Kaelum had none of that.
But even if he could become a powerful knight, which was a big if. Is that what he wanted? Sure, being a knight sounded cool, but it wasn’t like that was his dream. Kaelum had no idea what he wanted.
If he were asked what he wanted last week, he would’ve replied that he’d like to have more pastries. Kaelum had never actually dared to dream of anything greater than finding semi-fresh pastries in the trash, and even that seemed like a pipedream sometimes.
His thoughts turned to Tiela, he hates to admit it, but he actually really likes talking with the mysterious ‘princess’. She’s a really interesting person and even if she pretended to be a know-it-all sometimes, she did say a lot of interesting things. From talking about other countries and the future, to her knowledge of magic and all the wacky spells you could perform.
Thinking of their conversations, Kaelum realized he talked more to her in the past three days than he had in the past year with anyone else.
Other than talking to Peake on occasion, he didn’t really talk to anyone else. He hadn’t realized just how lonely he was until now.
While he would never tell her that he actually liked her and thought of her as a friend to her face, he couldn’t help but admit that he felt close to her. Being able to feel each other’s feelings and thoughts on an almost constant basis removed most boundaries between them and they couldn’t help but feel comfortable around each other.
Kaelum realized at this point that he had subconsciously placed Tiela into his list of friends in his mind. It was a shortlist, and just a few days ago only had Peake listed. But now he considered Peake, Tiela, and Karrow to be his friends.
If nothing else, Kaelum wanted to help his new friend. He didn’t have a lot of them, after all. But he’d never actually tell her that.
With all of these thoughts raging in his head, Kaelum didn’t notice Karrow come up to him while he was working.
Karrow saw the look of deep thought on Kaelum’s face, thinking that Kaelum probably assumed that he would never see the princess again after today. Karrow thought that he would likely give up on his dreams of becoming the princess's knight after today.
Karrow once had a dream of his own, he wanted to avenge his clan and right all the wrongs that had been done to them. He had been a genius when he was younger, but once he reached the third tier, he had never been able to ascend into the fourth tier beyond it. Stuck at that illusory wall
Stuck as a third-tier mage, his dreams were all for naught. He wasn’t unhappy with his life now, but he hated seeing someone give up on their dreams. He could see the struggle on Kaelum’s face while he was in deep thought and decided to give him a nudge in the right direction.
Kaelum was still deep in thought, all of the questions swirling around his head had boiled down to ‘could he do it’? Kaelum scoffed, thinking it was silly that he would even consider it. Kaelum was-
Suddenly a rough hand grasped his shoulder and he heard a sentence nobody had ever said to him before.
“I believe in you.” Said Karrow with a tone of utmost assurance and sincerity. He truly believed in him.
Karrow looked deeply into Kaelum’s eyes and said the words that would change his life with the most confident tone Kaelum had ever heard. “I believe that as long as you don’t give up, you can accomplish anything, Kaelum.”
What a stupid thing to say thought Kaelum. It seemed to be raining in Kaelum’s eyes, he wiped the tears from his eyes while cursing the rain. Kaelum would never admit that the reassurance from the rough man was the first he had ever heard from someone else. He’d also never admit how warm it made him feel inside, or even that it brought him to tears.
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