Noah

“I can’t find my sweatshirt.”

“It’s hot outside.”

“Maybe, but I still want to wear another layer. It makes me feel protected.”

He comes up from behind and wraps his arms around me, hugging me, then begins kissing my neck. “I’ll protect you.”

“We have to go. Aren’t you the one always making me eat?” He spends a minute not answering and continues kissing my neck until I have no choice but to turn around and kiss him back. Kissing Ten is probably the best thing I’ll ever do. 

“Take mine.” He pulls away, removing his hand that had found its way up my shirt, and heads out the door.

“Fine.” I grab his zip-up from his desk chair and shrug it on and walk through the door. But then he stops and looks at me.

“Wait, I forgot something. Come here,” and he pulls me back into the room and shoves me against the door and kisses me.

“That’s what you forgot?” I say as he pulls away, slightly breathless.

“Yeah, I forgot that it will be an entire day until I could do that again.”

And he then turns around, heading for the dining hall.

And I’m left wondering what we are. What does this mean for our relationship? I want to ask him but I think I’m afraid of what he’ll say so I don’t.

When we enter the busy hall, Ten gestures towards the table and says, “I’ll get you food. Go sit.”

“You know I’m perfectly capable of getting my own food. I don’t know why you insist on doing this.”

“Just let me do it. It makes me feel better.”

What does he mean by that? How does getting me food make him feel better? I add it to the running mental list of things I want to ask Ten but I’m a little bitch. I roll my eyes and head towards the table that is already occupied by all the Cybats.

I still get strange looks from the other units but no one from the CCIU has ever made me feel out of place, even though I belong to another unit. I wonder if it’s because of Ten. He seems to be their leader, in a way. Anything he says goes. But still, they have always been so welcoming to me, and sitting with them for meals is something I look forward to. I sit down next to Terry who is nearly finished with his plate of food.

He looks at me for a long minute before saying, “You’re wearing Ten’s sweatshirt.”

I awkwardly pull at the fabric that hangs off of me. Ten was fairly larger than me and so his sweatshirt looked oversized on me. “Oh, yeah. I couldn’t find mine.”

He squints as if trying to figure something out. “Okay.” But he doesn’t sound content with that answer. But what was I going to say? After all, it is the truth. I wasn’t wearing it for any other reason. Though, the comfort I feel wearing his clothes astounds me. I think about how Ten may end up missing a few articles of clothing in the coming days.

I feel Ten slump down beside me, sliding the tray of food in front of me.

“Ten, settle a bet. Wade thinks he’s gotten his dick sucked more than you.”

I feel heat rush to my face, practically still feeling Ten’s cock down my throat.

“Wade, that’s impossible. I’m gay and go to an all-boys school.”

“So what? You don’t know how wild my summer’s get! Hey, Noah, what about you? Wild summers?”

“Um no.”

“You don’t get freaky? I feel like you would be a secret slut.”

Ten lets out a laugh and says “yeah, Noah, I can see you being dirty.”

I can’t believe he’s saying that right now. After we just- after I- I’m so flustered that I burst out, “I’ve only gotten head once.”

And then Ten stops smiling, a bit shocked. I want to turn to him and say, “Yes, Ten, you were the first person to suck my dick,” but I reason that wouldn’t go over very well.

“Damn. Was it at least good?”

“Eh.” And Ten nearly loses it. I want to laugh at how speechless he is.

No, it wasn’t “eh.” It was the best thing I’ve ever experienced. But it’s his fault for starting up with me.

“Shit man, that’s a shame.” 

“Yeah, it’s okay. Always room for improvement.”

“I bet guys are better at sucking dick than girls, though. Ten, can you confirm?”

“Nah, never been with a girl, you know that.”

Wade and Terry nod but I didn’t know that. I guess it makes sense because he’s never really left SFAMS.

“Who gives the best head from the guys here?” Wade looks around the packed room.

“Why? Thinking about messing around?” Ten jokes but Wade doesn’t look like he’s joking at all.

“If I were to venture over to the dark side, who would be my best bet?”

I shift awkwardly in my seat because I can feel Ten staring at me.

“In your league? Try Joseph from CIU. He’s usually down.”

“Who’s Joseph?” I ask trying not to sound too curious. Ten side glances me.

Terry not so subtly points to a short brown-haired guy sitting a few tables over. He’s got a pen in his hand and it writing at a pace I have never seen before.

“Oh, he’s cute,” Wade says as he stares at him.

Ten leans over me to grab a cherry tomato off of my plate, using the opportunity to whisper, “can’t compare,” into my ear.

If I wasn’t already blushing, now I was red. And really all I wanted to do was kiss him but I don’t think it’s proper dining hall etiquette.

“Ten, training starts in five. Let’s head out. Noah, see you at lunch?”

I nod and watch as the table clears, the boys heading for the CCIU gym. But Ten manages to linger behind.

“You didn’t tell me.”

“Tell you what?”

He whispers, “that you’ve never gotten head before.”

I look around us, then I look back at Ten and say, “You already said you wouldn’t, um, you know, because I was a virgin. I didn’t want you to not do anything with me.”

He thinks for a moment before he says, “‘Eh?’ Really?”

I let out a cackle and playfully punch his shoulder. “It’s okay bro, you’ll get it next time.”

“Noah…”

“Ten, you know you’re good at it. You don’t need my analysis.”

“But I’d like it.”

“You’re gonna be late.”

“Fine. See you at lunch.”

“I’m skipping. I have to work on my shot.”

“No, you aren’t.” He begins walking away, thinking that I obviously will listen to him.

“We’ve been over this. You don’t get to tell me what to do.”

He turns around, slightly annoyed, and says, “I do if you’re being an idiot. Lunch. See you there.”

I don’t say anything and let him leave. I don’t know if I’ll listen. I really do need to work on my shot. The first time I’ve shot a gun was a few weeks ago and I wasn’t learning fast enough. Honestly, I don’t even know why I want to get better at it. What am I trying to prove? That I belong here? I don’t even want to be here. I was practically forced to join SFAMS. Why do I all of the sudden have this overwhelming motivation to actually succeed? Is it my ego acting up? Is it Ten? Maybe I want to be good for him. Worthy of him, perhaps.

Fuck I really am pathetic, aren’t I?

The morning goes by slowly. The first hour was just boxing matches to warm up. The second hour was a class about military tactics. The third hour was instructed fighting techniques. The fourth hour was geographical conquest which I didn’t really get the point because we aren’t living in times where you can annex a foreign land. I don’t think that’s the goal of most armies. But, to be fair, what do I know about the army? I wonder if Ten knows secrets about the government and shit. When I think of Ten and secrets, something about it makes my stomach turn. Something isn’t right. He was raised here, but why? Why was he left at the steps of a secret government training facility? It doesn’t make any sense. But he doesn’t talk about it. I mean, maybe he’s just over talking about it. Maybe he doesn’t even think about it anymore. In that case, I should probably not be thinking about it either. But…I can’t help feeling that there is something…I don’t know…off about his story. I should really make a list of things to ask him about when I’m done being scared.

I skip lunch and I half expect Ten to hunt me down but he doesn’t. I try to tell myself that I’m not disappointed. This is what you wanted, right?

I work on my aim, but holding a gun, especially an assault rifle, doesn’t feel natural to me. And the noise rings through my ears in a way that nauseates me. I hate it.

“Found something you aren’t good at?”

I turn away from the target paper I had been analyzing. I only hit the center twice. Kennedy is standing a bit too close for comfort. Or, maybe I’m being overly sensitive. I don’t know.

“It’s not that hard.”

He smirks and says, “Ah, modest, aren’t you?

I shrug because I have no idea what he’s on about. He takes a step closer and I pretend not to be taken aback. His far larger than me, dark eyes to match his equally dark hair. He’s good-looking in a harsh kind of way, if that makes sense. He’s got a few scars on his face, suggesting of a violent past or something like that.

“You know, if you want help with your aim, I happen to have the best record in the CAU.”

“Really? You don’t have to. I’m sure you’ve got other things to do.”

He smiles, this time, teeth showing a bit. “Oh yes, tons. I’m a very busy man. But what are friends for?”

I give him a small smile in return.

Ten

“Why was Noah wearing your sweatshirt?”

“Listen, Terry, I’m sorry about before. I kind of freaked out on you and you didn’t do anything wrong.”

“It’s fine. I was out of line. I shouldn’t have said that shit.”

“You weren’t out of line.”

“What do you mean?”

Lunch had been disappointing. Noah didn’t show up and I almost went to track him down but I took the moment alone with Terry to apologize. The other boys had eaten earlier because of some other shit and it was just me and him.

“Nothing. Just- I mean, you’re my friend. You’re allowed to say things to me.”

He looks down at his half-eaten plate- and then back up with a sympathy smile. “It must be hard. You know, rooming with him.”

And maybe I should tell him that yeah, it had been hard as fuck, but now that things had changed between us, I only foresee other things being hard. But I don’t tell him. I just nod. I think a part of me wants to keep Noah to myself. Or maybe if word gets out, The General will make Noah switch rooms. Or I don’t know, maybe he would get in trouble. It’s better if I just keep this to myself.

“Do you want to hang tonight?”

“Oh…I don’t know.” Because I really was planning on spending the night making Noah feel so good that he can’t help but make those fucking beautiful moans and soft whimpers. Hanging out with Terry and the boys was always a good time but Noah had them all beat.

After I finished my lunch, I head toward the CAU shooting range. It isn’t hard to spot Noah, especially when Mires is standing over him. Mires is not someone who I know well, but he’s been around for a while. I sort of know of him rather than know him. He apparently has some skill with guns, but other than that, I don’t know much about him. I assume he is helping Noah with his aim.

I smile to myself because Noah is still wearing my sweatshirt, even though it looks ridiculous on him. The sleeves are all baggy and scrunched up and the hem reaches past his thighs. It so adorable that I almost don’t notice that Mires is standing very close to Noah, hands rested on his arm in a way I really didn’t like. I take in the guy’s posture, noticing the way he leans in so he’s fully against Noah’s back. He’s got this smug smile on that I wouldn’t mind punching off of him.

When Noah sees me approaching, he immediately steps away from the guy, making me wonder if Noah knew how it looked.

“Ten. What are you doing here?”

I don’t say anything, instead, I eye Mires, sizing him up.

“The famous Ten, I don’t think we’ve ever actually met. Kennedy Mires.” Kennedy. The guy who took Noah’s picture? Aw hell no. He puts out his hand for me to shake. I take his hand and shake it once.

“Yeah, haven’t heard much about you.” That alone wasn’t an insult, but my arrogant nonchalant tone made the comment undoubtedly a sting.

“We can’t all be as popular as you. I was just helping Noah with his aim. He’s already gotten better. Quick learner, this one,” he says and he places his hand on Noah’s shoulder and squeezes. He winks at me. I have to hold back a growl.

I choose to ignore him and look at Noah. “I brought you some food. I would’ve come earlier but I had to speak to Terry. Can you please eat it? I have to run, but really, Noah, it’s important.”

“Yeah, thanks, Ten. I will.”

“Dinner?”

“Yeah.”

“Good. See ya.”

I turn around to leave without acknowledging Mires. Fucking asshole. 

Noah shows up at dinner and I let out a sigh of relief. He sits next to me and I can’t help but reach under the table to squeeze his thigh. He jolts at the sudden touch but then smiles at me. I really want to go back to the room now. I really want to kiss him. I-

“Terry and I are hanging in your room tonight. We have things to discuss.”

I turn to Noah who looks at me with an expression that probably matches mine. He must have had similar plans for tonight. Good to know we’re on the same page.

“You know, I’m pretty tired from today. Was gonna crash early. Besides, Noah, weren’t you telling me that you needed some quiet to study?”

“Oh, um, yes.”

Wade looks at Terry and then Terry looks at me.

“What?”

“Nothing…it’s just-“

“Boys, how we doing?” Fucking Mires sits down next to the empty spot by Noah and slings his arm around his shoulder.

“Who are you?” Wade says one hundred percent serious, making it even bigger of a burn.

“Mires, CAU.”

“Alright so why are you sitting with us?” Terry speaks this time and I’m grateful my friends get bad vibes off of him too. 

“I’m not the only CAU here.” He leans into Noah and whispers something that makes him squirm and that makes me very angry…too angry to say or do anything rational. But before I lose it, Terry interjects.

“No offense, but you aren’t exactly welcomed to sit here. Maybe go sit with the rest of the CAU.”

“But Noah is also-“

“Sure, but you aren’t Noah. So how about you go back to where you are wanted.” I try to not sound violent but I knew from the way Mires reacted that I must have sounded pretty aggressive.

“This is some bullshit. Noah, you wanna come sit with people from your actual unit?”

Noah looks at me, eyes a bit wide, a bit scared. “Thanks, I think I’m fine here.”

Mires looks at Noah then at me and then back at Noah. For a moment, I think he realizes something, but then he just grunts a nice little “fuck you” and walks away.

“What was that about?”

“I don’t know. He helped me work on my aim for awhile today. He’s actually been really helpful. He’s the only CAU that actually talks to me. I kind of feel bad-“

“Don’t. Mires is a bitch.” It was only surprising because Wade said it. I didn’t even know he knew Mires.

“Wade?”

“Nothing. I’ve just heard he isn’t the best of guys.”

“But he’s been really nice to me.”

Terry looks at me for a moment, calculating, and then turns to Noah and says, “Some times people aren’t nice for the right reasons.”

“You mean you think he was only being nice because he wanted something from me?”

“I think he saw an opportunity and took it.”

“Ten?” I think Noah is questioning my silence on the matter. But I really don’t want to do this right now…or ever.

“I don’t trust him.”

“Okay.” And like that, the conversation ends. Wade continues being an idiot. Terry continues rolling his eyes. And I continue wishing Noah and I were alone.