When he came to he found himself in a hospital bed. The first thing he realised was that his whole body was aching. His mind slowly cleared and when it did he pressed the button to call a nurse. He didn´t have to wait long before one appeared.

"Mr. Dean, how are you feeling?"

"Fine, I guess." He shrugged, once again becoming aware of the state his body was in. He avoided looking into her eyes, because if she looked into his eyes he was sure she would easily see through the lie. He was vulnerable right now.

So instead of looking into her eyes he assessed her as a person. She seemed to be between 25 and 30 and had her long brown hair done up in a ponytail, looking content with her job and life. At peace.

"How did I get here?"

"Luckily one of your neighbors, Mr. Robert I believe, found you. Just in time."

"Oh."

"Is there someone we could call?"

He didn`t answer, because there was. She was, now that this with Elias was over, officially the last person he had. But for the death of him: he didn`t want her to come.

"My mother. But she is extremly buisy and I wouldn`t want to bother her."

"Nonsense. Any mother has time when her child is in a hospital."

He nodded defeated.

After he gave the nurse his mother`s number he was left to wait anxiously. When he finally couldn`t stand it anymore to just sit around he looked around for his cell phone but couldn`t find it. Had he left it in `their` apartment? Shit, that could be, he thought. Or the nurse had took it. He pushed the button again. The nurse soon appeared.

"Did I have my cell phone with me?"

She shook her head. "I stored everything away you had with you, but there was no cell phone. I`m pretty sure of that. Should I go look anyways?"

"No, I believe you would remember. Thanks."

He was fucked.

Sadly, before he could worry too much about this problem an even bigger one walked right through the door.

"Mother."

"Son..." She trailed and eyed the nurse, who apparently got the hint and left.

"I told you he was no good." 

He groaned.

"And now see what happened. Do you want to press charges?"

"No, he was drunk." He stated dryly. "I`m done with this chapter of my life."

"If you would have listened to me in the first place, then this wouldn`t be a chapter at all. I..." She went on and on with a lecture about how all his decisions had been mistakes. He chose to not listen and instead focused on the pattern of the sheets. After what was probably an eternity she stopped and looked at him, like really looked at him, maybe for the first time in years.

"You did love him, didn`t you?"

He just nodded, knowing that if he spoke tears would start falling.

"Well there is still a mess to clean up, but I suppose you`re punished enough as it is. A nurse told me that you should stay at least one or two more days. I will send someone to your apartment to get your things and then you can move into mine for the time being." `Her` apartment was an overstatement. But relieved he didn`t have to take care of the things still in the apartment, among them his cell phone, he didn`t argue.

He spend the rest of the day fading in and out of consciousness.

***

Early the next morning one of his mother`s `goons` arrived with his cell phone and a change of clothes for when he could leave the hospital. He informed him that his mother didn`t have time for him today and that his other stuff was already at his mother`s apartment. The goon wasn`t all that much of a small talk person and left again after not even ten minutes.

Once again alone he had time, way too much time, and with nothing else to do he was forced to think. Did Elias ever really love him? When did he start cheating? Was it his fault? Was he just not enough? He couldn`t answer those questions and doubting himself didn`t help his case. But then again: did he want to know the answers? Maybe Elias hadn`t loved him but he had never  before raised a hand against him, not even in his drunkest states. Did that mean he loved Zac? Sinking deeper he felt hollow. Empty. Numb.

After a while, or so he thought, he stopped those thoughts. Not thinking of his mental well-being, for now, he focused on his physical well-being: He didn`t have a job nor an apartment. And he couldn`t stay at his mother`s for long. He decided getting a job would be his number one priority after he was out of the hospital.

He sighed. Oh how he wished that he could just stay in this bed forever and not think about his life outside of it. He was ready to drift back to sleep when the door opened and a nurse followed by a doctor entered. 

"Hello Adlai. I`m Dr. Saunders, I will do a physical check-up to see if you can leave the hospital."

Not knowing what to say he just nodded politely.

The older man did his thing, asking him questions now and then. Giving short answers he wasn`t really paying attention. Was he ready to be thrown into the life outside of this room? Certainly not. But one can never be ready, right?

"...looks normal. Adlai? Mr. Dean?" He refocused his eyes, looking at the doctor.

"Yes sir?"

"I`m finished with the check-up. You can leave anytime now. I will get your discharge paperwork ready, but seeing that it is already 7 pm I would encourage you to stay another night."

Wait.

"7 pm?"

"Yes?" The doctor seemed confused. "Would you like to leave now?"

"Oh, no." He had just been surprised. he hadn`t even eaten anything for lunch. Had he been so deep in thought? Or had he fallen asleep in between his thoughts? At least one of the above must have happened.

"May I have dinner?"

"Yes, right, of course. I forgot. You didn`t eat. Christine will bring you something. You were sleeping when it was lunchtime and we didn`t want to wake you."

He nodded slowly, still a little out of it.