Urgh.

That dratted Isaac—does he think I’m blind and do not realize how he stares at my boyfriend? Or does he simply not care?

…Gods, I know I sure wouldn’t mind the opinions of others if I had his physique. With the way I am now, the worst I could do to him is yap at his face like a little chipmunk and pray he won’t decide to smack me in the face.

Friend… honestly, I did not think I would be here at this point in time. The future had seemed so bright when I last checked in, it is strange to think it all fell apart, and so quickly at that, too. David has started his lessons—that part is good, he seems happy, I am glad—and I’ve gotten even more contracts and offers that I can count! However… I’m not sure if it would be wise to accept, or if I could fulfil those contracts, should I say yes.

I despise jotting this down, friend, truly I do—for it makes everything seem all the more real. But I’ve been suffering from quite the annoying pains lately, and I don’t know what to do.

I called my doctor back once David departed for his part-time job, and ignored the image of Isaac flirting with him once he would get to the shop.

My doctor told me to come in next Monday. I probably shouldn’t be keeping David in the dark like this, but he has exams coming up, and he’s already been stressed out enough, I don’t need to add any more burdens to his plate—especially ones that do not particularly concern him. (Yes, if I were forced to take a break this time around, I would still have more than enough saved up to support us both for at least another year. What worries me is not being able to draw anymore. I have always found solace in art. I cannot imagine my life without it.)

Perhaps, friend, this current situation that is happening with David is what people mean when they say a honeymoon phase is over. I still love and cherish my darling angel, but we’ve fallen into a strange routine. Our schedules don’t match up anymore. Sometimes, I sleep in during the day and wake late at night, whilst he is an early bird, who arrives at his coffee shop by the time the sun has barely risen.

We still do make efforts to touch each other, yet, it is always quick. Our lovemaking sessions are nothing like what they were when we first got together almost two years ago. I know we both still want each other’s bodies—at least, I do—but we are too tired, and drained, to indulge in such pleasures most times.

Friend, as much as I would like to keep speaking with you (it has been too long, I have missed your presence in my life, dearly) I believe it would be wiser for me to take a small break. My wrist is throbbing with strange pins and needles. I need to contact my boss again; he is the only one I’ve told about my current predicament, and judging from his latest email, it seems he wants to assign me an assistant. I can’t say I am too pleased about that. I prefer working alone. But, if I haven’t a choice… I suppose I will make do.

Yours,

Alexander