Invisible Moon

Chapter 5

Follow The Invisible Moon

"following the star using a compass and a map,

but following the Invisible Moon using nothing."

#WINisWIND

For normal people, if you wanted to see the Invisible Moon, it would be such a difficult task.

Many fans wanted to see P'In so badly but couldn't, as P'In always hide himself. While I wasn't a Unistar fan, and wasn't a P'In fan either, I was just a fading person who could see P'In.

Nevertheless, I still can't stop wondering.

I had been dreaming of becoming a popular person. I thought I must be so proud and happy. Wherever I went, always got attention. However, P'In was a celebrity, he got everything which a person like me could only desire, but his behavior was like myself in the past.

P'In was really strange.

I secretly followed P'In and kept a distance, until P'In stopped under a stairway of the overpass nearby my university. There was an old man with the dirty cloth sleeping under the old blanket.

"Good morning." P'In greeted and sat with him without showing any disgusted or scared expression on his face.

"Oh, today you come too?"

"For you." P'In said shortly, handing the meal box to that old man.

"Thank you." The old man took it.

"Trouble you again, you don't have to bring it to me every day, I don't want to bother you too much, young man."

"It's okay." P'In said while opening another meal box and ate together with the old man.

"Thank you so much, you are very good at cooking."

P'In and the old man were eating together, I wondered whether he was an acquaintance of P'In.

Whatever, looking at someone eating made me hungry as well, so I bought the deep-fried banana to eat along.

"Rainy season is coming, you can be sick, may I help you find a room?." P'In asked.

"I'm okay." The old man replied. "I don't want to trouble you. I'm waiting for my son to take me home. My family has a lot of debt, he is afraid that the usurer will come, it's not safe to stay at home. So he asked me for a temporary leave. My son promised he will take me back home after paying all the debt.

The old man's face looked so lively when talking about his son.

"If I move to other places," The old man continued. "I'm afraid my son can't find me. It's fine, young man, I can still wait here."

P'In listened quietly while eating.

I didn't understand why my tears came out a little as I heard the old man's story. Even though I was just a fading person, I still read a lot of books and news. Since I didn't have many friends, I let all the books become my friends. By the way, I knew this sort of thing could happen often in Thailand, especially in a poor family which couldn't get sufficient education.

In the case of this old man, if his son was indeed good, how could he let his father suffer like this. If he was really afraid that the usurer would harm his father, he should find a better place instead, not letting his father stay homeless like this. This wouldn't be more dangerous than the usurer?

It was obvious that his son had already abandoned his father, I didn't know whether he had real debt. But even if he could pay back the whole debt, he would never take his father back home.

The way this father thought made me feel depressed, just for making his son satisfied, he could endure suffering. Whatever his son said, father always trusted without a doubt. Even if the father had to be homeless as if a beggar, he still believed that his son would come to take him home.

This was the love of the father, I didn't know whether his son would realise, but at least, there was someone who realises — P'In, this celebrity Moon.

Supposing that it was me, I wouldn't dare be involved with the homeless, because I was afraid either. It was hard to know that they would harm us or not. But P'In wasn't only not afraid, but also gave him food.

Oh right, I remembered that I saw a post on twitter that said a person gave food to the homeless nearby my university.

I tried to find that tweet on my phone, it was posted last week, which meant this old man had been waiting for his son for over a week and P'In kept bringing food for him. I wondered whether P'In knew that this old man had been already abandoned, still, P'In chose to say nothing.

On the one hand, I really couldn't understand why P'In just let him wait hopelessly. On the other hand, I knew that hope was like the heart of our life, without hope — no point for living.

If P'In told him the truth, this old man would be disheartened, so P'In just didn't say but looked after him as much as he could, despite he was neither relative nor friend.

When P'In finished eating, he took the wallet and gave money to the old man — 60 baht.

"Evening I'll be busy, take it to buy food."

"Thank you, young man, I could live without difficulty because of you, you always helped me."

The old man accepted with gratitude.

"I promise, when my son comes, I'll surely repay you."

The old man still had hope.

P'In just stood up and kept walking without saying a word. I wondered whether there would be any way to help this old man. I had read and knew that there were some non-profit foundations which could help. But I would better wait and see, perhaps P'In might have already thought about this.

After that, I saw P'In carrying another bag on the way to the riverfront. And went into a small temple there. I followed.

Woof! Woof! Woof!

I paused for a moment, because as soon as P'In walked there, the dogs, almost ten, were running toward him, they ran, jumped and were wagging their tail joyfully. They all stray dogs. Just a few seconds ago, their eyes looked depressed, when suddenly they saw P'In, they all became cheerful as if seeing the owner.

In Thailand, stray dogs or cats could be found in many places, especially at the temples. There were many irresponsible animal owners in my country, yet the authorities weren't able to solve this issue. So the temple — some people considered Thai temples as the almshouses for poor people and animals — had no choice but needed to look after some abandoned animals.

Now the dogs were barking so loudly.

"Shhh..." P'In raised his finger touching his mouth, making the dogs to be quiet.

"Sit." P'In ordered gently, surprisingly, every dog seemed to understand. They all sat down and stopped barking.

The bag that P'In had been carrying, I just knew it was dog food. P'In put it out and fed each dog. The dogs seemed very hungry so they came to eat quickly.

After P'In fed all the dogs, he paused for a moment and counted the number of dogs. Then, P'In was looking for something.

"White." P'In walked to the wall corner, a white dirty dog was walking toward P'In.

The white dog seemed to be quite old, couldn't smell or see clearly, as it bumped into other dogs, and was hissed.

"White, come here." P'In called gently, the dog followed his voice.

P'In put the dog food on his hand and fed it. The dog came to eat slowly.

During feeding, P'In used another hand to pat the dog softly, and then he was smiling.

P'In...smile...

I was stunned, didn't know how to express my feeling — like my heart was shaking.

His smile full of kindness and purity, I had never seen anyone who could smile warmly this much.

It made me feel...impressed in P'In.

That was bad, why my heart couldn't stop shaking, I needed to hold myself.

After P'In finished feeding, he moved to a pagoda, there were many donation boxes — mostly for maintenance temple, novice monk education, sick monk, water and electricity fee, dog food, P'In put the money in every box.

Aside from feeding dogs, P'In also helped the temple. Why was he so kind?

After that, P'In walked out to the riverfront, and I followed.

A grandma-old woman was selling the fish bread, it wasn't very crowded here, only those who were waiting for the ferryboat, and this riverfront wasn't that popular, so there were only a few people.

"Hi, little In, are you coming to feed the fish?" The old woman greeted him.

"Sawaddee[1] Krub[2]." P'In raised his hand to pay respect[3]. The old woman raised her hand to respond as well.

"Pay respect to the monk[4], recently I could sell many because of you. There are not many people feeding fish here. But I don't know where to go, I can't walk that far."

P'In didn't reply, he just said.

"Ten packs of bread please."

"Isn't it too much, little In? I'm glad that you want to help me, but I'm worried you won't have enough money."

"I'm okay, evening I'll go to work." P'In said while he paid the old woman one hundred baht. So each pack was ten baht — quite cheap.

"I see, they take good care of you so well. I'm so glad to hear that, thank you, little In, blessing you."

After buying, P'In carried the bread packs toward the riverside, he picked up one, and put others on the ground. He slowly tore the bread into a small piece and threw it into the river.

"Oh!" I exclaimed. There are a lot of fish here, they looked very hungry. Just throwing for a second, many catfishes swarmed to eat — almost scrambling each other.

So many fishes! No wonder why P'In bought ten packs.

I could only stand and look until P'In spoke up without turning to me.

"Nothing to do? Come to help"

Huh? I raised my eyebrows and looked around — No one here, only me and P'In. Most people were waiting for the boat at the port.

Was P'In talking to me? Or he was just talking to himself? I wondered, kept looking for somebody else.

"I've seen you since giving alms." He said and was still feeding the fish.

Seen...since...giving...alms

The word 'giving alms' made me startled.

It was me?

Don't tell me — He was actually talking to me?

No way, I was such a fading person, how could he see me? P'In didn't even look at me, when did he notice that?

"Don't wanna help, it's alright." P'In said, then picked another bread pack and continued feeding.

"Oh, I'll help!"

I realised that I was stalking P'In for that long. If he even asked for help but I still ignored him, that would be impolite.

Then, I moved beside P'In and helped him feed.

When I was standing near him, I could see P'In clearer than before. P'In in reality looked so much better than the photo. Also, being mysterious like this, somebody might mistake him as the riverside angel.

"Do you usually do this?" I asked.

Included giving alms to the monk, offering food to the homeless, feeding stray dogs, donating for a temple, helping old people and also feeding fishes.

"Not really." He said, and tried to throw the bread far away, so the fishes wouldn't be scrambling.

P'In had a deep voice but sounded very soft and smooth. It was a pity that he didn't seem to be a talkative person. Why he had to be born with such a handsome voice!

But more surprised, P'In was talking to me!

This person is a Unistar member, The Moon of the country!

"Oh I see, if you do charity things like this often, it must be tried." I nodded, not surprised that he couldn't do every day.

"No people usually help me." P'In argued in a monotone.

Huh? I blinked my eyes.

Wait, what he meant from my question wasn't about charity, it was about no one helped him?

"What's about your fans?" I thought of the group of young women who participate in giving alms.

"There're many people, you could call them to help."

"No one followed." He said. Still feeding.

What? I scratched my head and the bread crumb was spread on my hair.

Because P'In didn't want them to see, right?

"If they could see you, they'd follow."

My words made P'In glanced at me calmly.

When being stared, I just realised—

"No, I'm not a stalker." I said immediately, afraid that he might misunderstand. How should I give the excuse?

Oh yeah, I remembered.

"Well, I'd like to ask for your signature."

I picked up the senior signature book from the freshmen welcome ceremony. Luckily, I brought it here.

"Well, it's not easy to meet you and you are my senior, please sign for me."

I pretended to ask, even if it was too bold.

P'In just looked at it, then put the bread packs on top of my book that I was trying to hand to him.

"Almost done." He said.

"Huh?" I was confused.

"Oh, It means that if I help you feed all these, you will sign for me, right?"

I said this so clearly but P'In didn't answer, didn't take my book either.

So I decided to be quiet, but couldn't take that long. I wanted to talk because it was a long time since there was someone that I could talk to. In the past, I didn't get any chance to talk, or else I was forgotten.

"P'In krub." I asked. "Why you become the university Moon, also a Unistar member, but you like to be alone."

I knew that P'In was listening, but he was also quiet for a long time until he pointed out a myna bird perching on a bridge nearby.

"Look the bird."

I was looking, it was just a common myna — black-brown feather with some white, its yellow beak was outstanding.

Why did he want me to look at the bird? It was just a common bird.

Then, I intended to ask P'In, but it turned out that —

"Wait, P'In?" I gasped. Dropping all the bread into the river, causing the fishes crazily scramble to eat.

Well, P'In was just gone! He just stayed right here a few seconds ago.

He suddenly said 'Look the bird.' and then disappeared. What was that?!

Aside from his hiding skill, he was also able to teleport?

I sighed and fed the last bread pack.

What about my signature book? He would sign it for me, right? Oh no, he didn't answer either.

I signed again, threw the bread for the fishes and looked at the myna, exhaustedly.

Look the bird? Suddenly, there was a thought flashing in my head. I seemed to understand what P'In implied. Even though it was just a short sentence without any specific meaning

Why was P'In the Moon, but Invisible?

As you could see the little bird, it could fly anywhere, without concerning anyone.

Invisibility was like freedom.

☽------------☽

Footnote

[1] Sawaddee means 'Hello' in the Thai language. It's a very common cultural way to greet people.

[2] Krub is the Thai cultural way for showing respect to the interlocutor, normally "krub" is used by Thai male at the ending sound.

[3] Raising a hand to pay respect, in Thai called 'Whai', It's a very common cultural way to greet people, very polite and respectful. Normally, when younger people 'Whai (raising a hand to pay respect)' to the older, the older would raise a hand as a response to show that the older people receive their respect.

[4] Pay respect to the monk, some older people in Thailand would say that after receiving 'Whai' from younger people, it's like giving a blessing.