“I’m here,” I call out as I walked into the house. It's a one-story house. It's a little small, but for the family that was taking care of me, it was really nice. They have just over a year-old little girl.

“You’re here earlier then I thought you would be Sean,” Mrs. Carlson said from their bedroom, “I thought you would have had swimming practice first.”

I chuckled a bit as I slipped off my shoes, “No that doesn’t start for another couple of months.” I responded.

“Can you take Lilly into the living room so I can take a shower please,” Mrs. Carlson asked walking over to me with the little girl on her hip.

She handed her off to me and I took her into the living room where Mr. Carlson was playing one of his video games. They had plenty of time considering that the reservations that they made weren’t till six tonight. I set Lilly on the floor and sat down with her. She instantly crawled up onto my lap and cuddled with me. Surprisingly it didn’t take long for her to like me. Mr. and Mrs. Carlson were really happy about that. And I’m pretty good with kids as it is. Younger kids, like anywhere between two months and about two years. It’s when they start getting into the terrible two and up is when it starts getting more difficult for me to deal with them.

“So how was school?” Mr. Carlson asked not taking his eyes off his game because he was in the middle of a battle.

“It wasn’t too bad. Standard first day of school really,” I shrugged.

“Didn’t get into any fights at all?”

“Nope,” I answered quickly. I really didn’t want to tell them that yes, I actually did. I didn’t want them to get upset with me.

“That’s great! I was terrible when I was in high school. I was constantly getting into fights,” He answered.

“It was interesting I saw a lot of my old friends and one of them is actually the captain of the swim team," I said. I honestly can't believe myself for calling Andrew a friend. Sasuke was more so my friend then that sleazeball of a roommate.

“So are you definitely planning on joining the swim team?” He perked up sounding very proud of me.

"I hope so. I have to make it through tryouts in a couple of months from now first though,” I responded playing with Lilly.

“If you make it you’ll have to give us your schedule so we can come see you swim,” I felt a small smile creep on my lips when I heard those words. It was nice to have someone actually interested in what I do.

“I’ll make sure to do that,” I smiled a little down at Lilly.

They show me that there’s plenty of food in the fridge and cupboards and that I could have whatever, but not the alcohol obviously. While I fed Lilly dinner they headed out on their little adventure together to celebrate their anniversary. I told them to have fun and they reminded me to get whatever homework I needed to get done before going to sleep or at least get most of it done. Not gonna lie I don’t wanna have to wake up earlier than I already have to in order to get the rest of my homework done.

I was able to get Lilly to sleep around seven thirty and I started on my homework. I didn’t really have all that much considering it was the first day of school and most teachers don’t assign homework the first day. I got it done around nine and then took the monitor into the bathroom with me so I could take a shower. I don’t know why but water has always made me relax. I guess it’s only been the real comfort I have. It lets me think.

It’s nuts how I couldn’t remember what Sasuke looked like. I know that we’ve both grown since I left in middle school but still, I should have been able to instantly recognize those red eyes of his. They stand out so much. It’s not something that one would be used to seeing every day. And what happened when he kicked me…was he the one that started that fire? If he did how did he do it? There were so many questions that I really wanted to ask him. But, I didn’t have his number, heck I don’t even know if he has a cell phone. I don’t, I should save up and get at least a pay as you go type phone, that way if something happens I have a way to get a hold of people. I’ll think about it. I don’t want to bother the Carlson’s with this type of thing. They are already doing so much for me with allowing me to stay here while I try to finish school.

No, I have to finish school That's not an option. I told them I would. It's the first step for me to decide on if I want to try to go to college or if I just want to go right into the workforce. That second option is probably more than likely going to be the case so I could get an apartment and then save up to one day maybe go to college if I can’t get a really good job before then, but I’ll just have to see what happens. Why is it that there so much that I feel like I'm left in the dark about? Why is it that I have to struggle through everything? Can't I get a break at least once? Putting on the strong and tough act…It's so tiring, it wears me out. But I can't show it. I need to stay strong, I need to get through this. Sighing quietly to myself I lean my head back into the water more and close my eyes, “I should get out before I’m in here all night.”

I finish up my shower and pull on the spare t-shirt and shorts that I brought with me from school, grabbed the monitor and pulled the fuzzy blanket off the couch then I went to my room, which was the spare bedroom in the house. It was right across from Lilly’s room so it was better than I lay down in here. After tossing the blanket on the bed I went and made sure the porch light was on and locked everything up before heading to bed myself. It was a habit for me to wake up early so I wasn't too worried about setting an alarm. Also, Mr. Carlson has to get up early for work anyway so he said that he'll make sure that I'm awake in time to get ready and go to school.

It was nice with it being so peaceful in the house. It makes it a lot easier to fall asleep and get a good night sleep. I was going to need it considering that I was going to be taking an advanced placement English course this year I needed all the rest I can get. As I relax my body my mind drifts off and I fall asleep.

"No way, Sean is that you?!! Fuck yeah, man!! Welcome back!” Slowing down to a stop I look to see who called my name. Andy and two people that I don’t know if I’ve met before come running over to me. “How are ya man!”

“Hey Andy,” I answer a little out of breath, “I’m okay, how about yourself?”

“I’m doing good! This is Sam and this is Nick. When did you get back?” Andy seemed so happy to see me. I don’t know why though.

“I got back a few days ago. The Carlson’s took me in, but I’ll be staying on the school grounds in the dorms this year,” I answer putting a hand on my hip.

“That’s awesome man!! Glad to have ya back! Hey come with me we can totally get ya to dorm with me this year! You still swim?” Andy slung an arm over my shoulders and pulled me in. We started walking towards the school.

“Well, yeah, but I really need to get-” Andrew cut me off.

“Fucking damn straight!! Let’s go to the pool and see what ya got!! I'm the captain this year for the swim team! With the four of us, we can be the strongest melody relay and kick ass and fuckin' take names!!"

I'm sorry Sasuke. I'll come to visit as soon as I can get away from Andy…

"Sean, how could you?" I stop dead in my tracks when I hear Sasuke's voice. Everything around me fades and turns to black. Turning around I see Sasuke standing there, his fists clenched and tears in the corner of his eyes.

“Wait, no, Sasuke, it’s not what you think,” I reach out to him but he doesn’t move.

"Just stay away from me. How could you throw in your lot with them? They're a bunch of assholes." He turns his back to me and starts walking away, "I guess this just means that you're throwing away your old friends."

“No, Sasuke, please, I’m not, I’m not throwing away anyone, please Sasuke listen to me,” He starts walking away from me, “SASUKE, FUCKING LISTEN TO ME FOR A GOD DAMN MINUTE!”

"We're done, Sean. I guess you don't want any help finding your family after all. Goodbye," My heart pounds and I feel myself stop in place. I'm reaching out to him but he keeps getting further away and I can't get my legs to move.

“SASUKE!!! SASUKE!! WAIT, PLEASE!!” I scream after him my throat burning and my chest tight. “What have I done?”

Gasping I launch up off my pillow. It’s pitch dark in the room. I look down at my hands. I’m shaking and there’s a cold sweat that’s trickling down my face and body. Looking over at where I placed the monitor it’s not there anymore. They must have gotten home. Sighing quietly I pull my legs into my chest and wrap my arms around and rest my forehead on my knees. “I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” I mutter to myself as I sit there and let the tears form at the corners of my eyes and my chest tighten. I’m so stupid. I hurt my best friend. He’ll never want to talk to me again. I’m so stupid.