Lyssa found a suitable campsite not far off the road. It hadn’t been used recently but there hadn’t been enough time for the plants to reclaim it either. She cleared a space for her to sleep later, kicking stones and branches out of the way.
Bouda was still too wound up to allow Lyssa to remove her tack peacefully. It was best to wait until she had settled to wage that particular war.
They had about an hour before the sun set so Lyssa took her dagger and went to find some meat to add to supplies she had.
Dusk was the best time to catch rabbits because there was just enough light to see by, and they felt safe in the growing dark. She wasn’t a great marksman but she was good enough to catch an unsuspecting rabbit.
Lyssa made her way carefully through the dense thickets as silently as she could. She found a relatively clear patch of grass and settled on the ground behind a bush.
She only had to wait half an hour, in blessed silence, before the rabbits started to appear.
She moved into a kneeling position and raised the dagger in one hand.
The blade flew through the air and hit the rabbit through the chest, killing it instantly. The others fled.
She retrieved her kill and headed back to camp, satisfied it would be enough for tonight. If she had been planning to stay a few days she would have set traps.
Unsurprisingly, she could hear Abi before she caught sight of the glow of a fire. At least the girl could build a fire.
“You need to let me remove your tack.” Abi was arguing with the horse.
The horse snorted and shifted to keep the girl in sight. Bouda wasn’t a placid animal that took to anyone who fed her, but she wasn’t usually this difficult either. She was a trained war horse and she tended to ignore those who weren’t a threat.
She’d ignored all Abi’s attempts to be nice up to this point. Otherwise Lyssa wouldn’t have left them alone, not if she thought Bouda had problems with Abi. She’d just saved the girl, so she really didn’t want Bouda putting a hoof to her head.
“Having problems?” Lyssa said.
Abi spun around to face her, and Lyssa would have said she looked guilty in that moment but the expression was quickly gone, turned into frustration.
“She’s being stubborn. I’m usually really good with horses.” The girl pointed an accusing finger at the horse.
“Don’t worry. She takes a while to warm up to people.” Lyssa moved between Abi and the agitated horse.
Bouda nipped her shoulder, and finding nothing to get her teeth into, moved to the warrior’s hair. She kept it short for practical reasons, most warriors did, but Bouda pulling it out in great clumps had been another.
Lyssa passed the rabbit and a knife to Abi so she could begin preparing it.
Abi pulled a face but sat down near the fire and set to her task.
Bouda was still uninterested in standing still to have her tack removed, so Lyssa changed her strategy and took some time to soothe the horse.
She brushed through her mane with her fingers and whispered words of the centaur language until the fidgeting had stopped. Then removed her saddle and brushed her down. She didn’t think they’d have to leave quickly, but she didn’t remove all of it and put what she could in easy reach.
Turning back to the fire she found Abi only half way done skinning the rabbit, and still with her face screwed up in disgust.
“You haven’t skinned rabbits before?” Lyssa held her hand out and Abi eagerly handed them over.
“I have, just not recently and it’s not the most pleasant job.” Abi held up her hands sticky with blood and fur. “I built a fire though.”
“Yes you did.” Lyssa couldn’t help the teasing tone of her voice.
Abi huffed in annoyance, but the corners of her mouth twitched up in a smile. The silence lasted for a minute and Lyssa almost congratulated Abi on lasting that long.
“You know those people will just find someone else to sacrifice.” Abi’s voice was quiet and soft but in the darkness it rang like an accusation in the warrior’s ears.
“Yes, that’s what god worshippers tend to do.” Lyssa agreed but tried to sound as dismissive as possible to end the conversation. She pulled out her knife, and searched in the bag for the rag she used to clean her weapons.
“But it’s not right. They shouldn’t be able to get away with it.” Abi leapt to her feet and gestured at the dark forest in what should be the direction of the bridge.
“There’s not much you can do.” Lyssa dipped the rag in some water and started to scrub the blood from the blade.
“No,” Abi agreed, “but there are things you could do.” Abi stopped pacing to stand opposite Lyssa, with only the low burning fire between them.
“I appreciate your confidence in my abilities but even I can’t be everywhere at once.” Lyssa stared back at Abi, maintaining eye contact, she would not back down on this point.
“I’m not saying everywhere but my village needs help.” Abi broke their eye contact first and kicked a rock in frustration. It bounced outside the light of the campfire and into the trees. “Ghanda is filling up with bandits and that bridge is the only way in or out. The trader hasn’t come like she usually does and we need to trade to survive.” She paced to the edge of the camp where the light faded and then back again to the fire.
“Were you trying to clear the bridge on your own?” Lyssa couldn’t believe Abi would be stupid enough to attempt that on her own, but she was starting to realise just how impulsive the girl could be.
“No, I was going to cross the bridge into Cahan and get to the next village to see if they could help us.” Abi’s voice raised in frustration.
“All by yourself?” Lyssa didn’t want to have this conversation, but she also felt a need to make Abi understand how reckless she had acted.
“Everyone else is too busy trying to fend off attacks and make sure the farmers are okay. I had to do something.”
“So you came across a boy being sacrificed and decided to attack the group of people head on instead of running for help.” Lyssa put the rag away and pulled out her sharpening stone to give the blade a better edge.
“I wouldn’t have got back in time, and I know him, he lives in one of the farms near my village. His name is Grusond and I couldn’t let the people from the other side of the river murder one of my people. Besides I’m not sure anyone would have come if I’d ran back home. There would have been lots of meetings at least.”
“Some in your village are starting to believe sacrifice might be the way forward.” Lyssa stated plainly what Abi was trying not to say.
“Yes, and we can’t do that. My mother’s told me what happened to other places that use sacrifice to appease the gods. In the end there’s no one left who’s free. The god becomes their life.” Abi sat down heavily as if her legs had just given out beneath her.
“Your mother sounds like she knows what she’s talking about.”
“She used to travel a lot and help people but now she’s settled down and it’s like all those stories she used to tell mean nothing to her because she won’t do anything.” The end of the sentence was rushed as Abi ran out of breath.
“I’m sure she’s trying her best. It’s harder when it’s your own home under attack. The way forward is not always clear.”
Lyssa was assaulted by memories of her own home. The fear of not knowing the best course of action had frozen most people as if winter had come early. They’d isolated themselves and stockpiled food until Lyssa had united the remaining clans and declared war. If only it had stopped there.
“Exactly,” Abi bounced where she sat, “I knew you’d understand.”
“Understand?” Lyssa snapped out of her memories, she had a terrible feeling she’d walked right into Abi’s trap.
“We need someone to protect us who doesn’t live here. Someone who can be objective and make the right choices without getting emotional.”
“Hold on…” Lyssa held up her hand to stall the enthusiasm, but it was too late and Abi barrelled right past her objections.
“You’re perfect, you can be our warrior. Hulna hasn’t had a warrior in generations. It’s not common in any of the Ghandan villages actually.”
“I appreciate your enthusiasm but you know nothing about me.” She closed her eyes and tried to ignore the pleading in her own voice. Where had she lost control of this conversation.
“You saved me. When you could have ignored the whole situation, they would have been done soon and you’d have been able to cross the bridge in peace but you didn’t even hesitate.”
“It wasn’t that hard to fight some villagers. Like I said you know nothing about me and you shouldn’t trust people just because they save you.”
“I know more than you think.” Abi declared, then shifted nervously, her gaze darting around the camp. “When you were gone and I was trying to help your horse I went through your saddlebags looking for feed for her. I wasn’t snooping, I promise, but I found something. It’s not much on it’s own but put it together with your fighting skills and that massive sword you carry. You're the Warlord of the Fang’s Edge.” Abi’s eyes were bright with wonder. She said it as if the thought there would be consequences for revealing this information had never crossed her mind.
“No I’m not.” Lyssa glared directly at the girl. A stare that had terrified a great many people into backing down.
“Maybe not anymore, but you were. You’re a great leader…”
“I did many awful things that you must have heard about if you know the story so I don’t know why you think I’d help.”
“Past is past. And you’ve already helped. You’re seeking redemption for all those things. You’re on a quest of healing, to try to make amends for everything you did in the name of that war god.” Abi was no longer looking at Lyssa. The girl’s eyes were fixed somewhere above the warrior’s head, seeing something only she could see, her hands raised as if to make the story in her head clearer.
Lyssa snapped her mouth closed when she realised it was hanging open in disbelief. This girl was having romantic fantasies about noble warriors and doing great deeds.
“You’ve read too many stories.”
“But it’s true right? You could have continued on as a warlord but you didn’t. You stopped. while you were in your prime. Evil people don’t do that.”
“Is this more wisdom from your mother?” Lyssa managed to stop herself from spitting those words but they still came out more snarled than she wanted them to. This girl was young and naive, there was no reason to be cruel to her.
“Yes, but not in those words.” Abi sat up straighter, but she also seemed less sure of herself now.
“Maybe I can help, but that’s a pretty big maybe.” Lyssa was on her feet and looming over the girl before she could stop herself. “I can’t solve all your problems by slaughtering everyone.” Lyssa waited until Abi’s eyes had stilled and all the girl’s attention was fixed on her. “I won’t slaughter everyone.” It came out as more of a growl of a beast than a human voice. As if the war god still had its hooks in her.
Abi sat there staring up at her with big wide eyes. She’d managed to scare the girl into silence. It didn’t feel satisfying.
“I don’t want anyone dead.” Her voice was no more than a whisper. “I just want protection for my village.” But still held a stubbornness that Lyssa had glimpsed on the bridge.
“That’s how it starts.” The words were strangled in her throat and Lyssa choked on them as she spoke.
She dropped back to the ground and lowered her head to focus on the skinning knife she still held in her hands. That was more emotion than she had meant to show. More emotion than she had shown in a long time. Something curled within her, different than the feelings of shame that had dominated her for the last year. Something that terrified her to unleash. She didn’t know if she could control herself if she acted on that rage.
Lyssa packed away her tools and said goodnight. Abi must have had enough sense to know when a conversation was over, because she didn’t reply or attempt to start a new conversation. She laid down on her own bedroll with her back to the fire and Lyssa.
It should have comforted her that Abi felt safe enough to turn her back on someone with Lyssa’s reputation, but it didn’t. It worried her how sheltered Abi was that she could trust so easily. It was a goodness that should be preserved.
Lyssa couldn’t leave these people to death and enslavement, but helping wasn’t going to be as straightforward as Abi thought it was going to be. The easy way was to kill.
Lyssa could have killed those people today, and any that came after for revenge but that’s not the warrior she wanted to be. And she couldn’t stick around for too long and make this her life. She had somewhere to be, a war to fight and a redemption to be earned. She would regain her honour before she died.
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