Ammi called me from my room to the dining table in a solemn voice. It was a voice I knew and a voice that filled me with fear. This was the voice she used when she told me I couldn’t sleep with Quaky, my teddy bear, anymore. And it was also the voice that she had used when telling me we would be moving from Delhi to Bangalore because of the “unfortunate circumstances”.
Both Mumma and Ammi were seated at the table, looking glum. I sat down in front of them feeling very aware even of the wooden chair beneath me. They looked at each other like they were sharing a secret. This made me angry earlier but now it just made me sad.
Ammi said, “We need to tell you something”.
Oh god, the dreaded words - “We need to tell you something”. It was these very words they used before they told me that many children had one father and one mother but having two mothers is perfectly okay too. What lay in store now.
Ammi continued speaking with a pained expression on her face, “Um beta, do you know that dogs, cats, even cows - get older faster than us? ” She started coughing then, gesturing to mom to continue.
Mumma was more direct, but sterner. “Coco became old like Dadu next door. He had trouble with his heart for a long time. A few days ago, his heart stopped beating.” She looks up then and the tears in her eyes signalled to me that this was serious, very serious.
I knew instantly what that meant - realization struck me like a lightning bolt. It meant that Coco was not in this world anymore, like Dadu next door who always had chocolates for me. I felt his absence the most at this moment. When I was sad, Coco would lick my face and jump around me like the dumb goofy dog he was. I was sad now and there was no Coco around me. I remembered how we played during the monsoons. We played games that I would invent on the spot and Coco would always agree. It was soon going to be the rainy season, but there would be no Coco to play with me.
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